SO NOW A LITTLE LIGHT RELIEF.
Every day there are many things I have to say on the show should the right time arise or the news reader not show, the thing is....
.... our show is sooo busy it's already full as an egg.
New ideas have to be sat on, the clock has to be watched, records (quite rightly) have to be played.
That's why the blog is so cathartic...
Stuff we have no time for today....
CATEGORY... EXTREME BUT EFFECTIVE.
A mate of mine made all his important stuff happen on the 22nd of September... it's his mum's birthday and now his wedding anniversary, the day he renews all his insurances and his car tax and m.o.t., his gym and golf club membership and anything else that takes place on an annual basis, this way, he says, he only needs to focus on just a few days a year....
CATEGORY... SIMILAR TO ABOVE.
Another friend of mine who's heard we're on a wedding diet is going the opposite way, she says, she doesn't want to look at her wedding photos for the rest of her life wishing she was still that slim... so she's going on a diet after the wedding so' when anyone sees her photos they will comment and how much weight she has lost.
CATEGORY....I HEARD THIS ONCE.
The RUSSIANS have a machine that can control the weather, thus guaranteeing good conditions for any state occassion. Apparently they used it at the MOSCOW olympics !
Ahh if we only had another hour or two.
CLP 2007.
X.
P.S. This is also to serve as a break from the heavy climate change jive we've been having all week.
Comments
Phew!
I heard the Chinese have a machine that can do that too ...
What a great idea, looking really awful in photos so you always look better in real life.
Mind you, I think I do anyway ...
x
"Jive"? "Jive"? Informed debate, I think you'll find Christophe! Mind you, I do know what you mean.
I became very fat after I married. Everyone said I was 'comfortable'. The truth is, I was utterly miserable!
Now, having seperated from my husband, I have lost more than five stone. Some people (the same as the previous ones, you should note) say it's because I'm stressed.
To be perfectly honest, with me, it was none of those things. It's more about control. When married I didn't control anything, not even the food I ate. Now, I control everything (but not in a freakish way!) and as a result am much happier and healthier!
Did you know that it's lucky to have a lizard in your house?
S xx.
P.S. It's nearly hometime - yippee!!!!
AHhhhhhh now I know why its been raining and sunny bits all day - there's something big going on in Russia - and I thought it was just the mini subs under the north pole happening.
Office is too quiet something is brewing.
The blog to me is always interesting, informative and downright amusing.
All the best to everyone
P
Everything on one day - that is extreme! I know a few friends who have got married on own / parents birthdays but that is about as far as it has gone. Mind you I did get married on Easter Saturday - but that never worked as it is a moveable feast -no wonder the marriage never lasted!
So if the Russians could control the weather - is this something we could use to help us now or is it just one of the causes of global warming.........??
Nev
I too have a machine that controls my weather. It is my very own, personal, micro-climate.
However I only use it when it is raining to keep dry.
It is called an 'Umbrella'
...and from the look of the partly clouds outside, I may well need it shortly...
sacha distel
love
hazel
x
As a young lass I used to put my empty egg shell in my egg cup upside down when my meal was done - it never fooled my mum, but I found it hilarious all the same.
So maybe the show isn't quite as full as it may seem...........
x
What a shame, Chris Langham lets rally around he a great comedian,
Juliet keep taking the tablets.
Yes CLP it has been a heavy and serious blog this week, but there are so many funny people on here (HL- I only wish that I could look in the mirror and see someone else looking back at me!) It lightens things up a little I think.
It's not been too bad a day today. I actually managed to get my bank to refund £150 of bank charges today. I tried to contact them via internet banking website, tried the call centre in some far flung place in the world, had no luck so went straight down to my branch. Saw a lovely lady who refunded the charges. Admittedly I was over the overdraft limit but found the charges totally disproportionate. I feel alittle better today having stood up for myself.
I hate having my photo taken and I'm not at all photogenic. I prefer natural pictures that aren't possed for to be honest. Black and white is better too. Soft focus and oh yes some airbrushing.
Love Deb x
hazel #5 - I have one too. It's called my 'happy bubble'.
I float around in it and try not to let the stresses of our building work (house extension), work and grumpy clients pop it.
There's a bit of a Bridget Jones' thing going on in my life and I lurch from slightly embarrassing episode, to slightly embarrassing episode! Hey! keeps you young.
BBx
p.s. always recycle. who wants to see more and more landfill sites?
p.p.s. it's a drop in the bucket, but at least we're trying.
Gaby
Thanks for your comments. It`s great that the blog has helped you over the last year. Their are wize and kind people on this blog.
Thanks to everyone else who has thought of me.
Socks, pulled up! Deep breath! A new journey starts with a first step!
Best wishes to everyone.
m xxx
Hmm the Russians and the Chinese eh? Well I am just watching the Avengers and we had a machine in the 60s that could shrink humans down to 3 inches tall. Now that would be cool.
JK Nonegreen
Blimmin' heck!
I actually won a game of squash (not salsa) this evening.
Nearly killed myself in the process, mind.
It is faintly reassuring that despite the pounds creeping on stealth-like when I'm not looking that I can still pull out a good game now and then.
But, when do you pack it in? Do I carry on until I have a cardiac or it simply becomes too emmbarrassing? Or, do I walk away, hang up my racquet, buy a cardie (sorry Chris) and accept that I am no longer 23?
I'll be 37 next month, by the way.
The forecast - I know we said we wouldn't do weather - is mighty fine this weekend, so I have cadged a snazzy soft-top from work and I shall get our tickets for The Cranleigh Show tomorrow, which, if you have forgotten, is Friday!!!!!!
I hope the sun smiles on you all.
Peace & love
MfR
PS Blowing through the jasmine in my mind
PPS Riding around in your jeep or your benzos
PPPS Little darlin' I feel the ice is slowly meltin'
I think I might have to start on the wedding diet soon, does it matter if I'm not getting married. Mine can be holiday diet
My friend and I were talking about going away for a few days where we went in April, just to the coast. I have really been looking forward to it as I've been pretty stressed recently as you all know and I have just enough money saved up for it. So then tonight I was talking to her and she said she can't go now and she just kept going on and on about her boyfriend. I'm never jealous and I do want to know all about it but we haven't spoken for over a week and lots of stuff has gone on in that week and she didn't once ask how I am?You are free to say that I am being selfish and get over it but I think some of you regulars will get where I am coming from.
Ok moaning over. Was just watching Lost in Translation for the 100th time on film 4. Do any of you remember that guy I was telling you about. The one who I've known for ages and I saw him in the city and I just wanted to kiss him? He got me hooked on that film.
Speaking of men. Out of the 3 blokes I have been flirting with I'm only really hearing from one at the mo. One has just stopped being flirty, the 2nd is still being really nice and I'm trying not to think about him too much as he's really nice and could really end up liking him a lot, and the 3rd I haven't really heard that much of but he's the only one I've invited to my drinks thing next week as we know a lot of the same peopleand he's lovely but I don't think its going anywhere. We shall see next wednesday when I turn 23!! Blimey another year gone!
Well little bloggers and blogettes I will try and post tomorrow on here. Hopefully going to Cromer for a paddle tomorrow, wheather permitting! Love Missy xx
Well, it's been four days now. Getting to work at about 0719. It's bleedin killin me.
AND I'm supposed to be going out tonight.
AND I'm supposed to be going to Pride tomorrow.
AND I'm supposed to be going on a Ghost Hunt tomorrow night.
Yep. All on the same day. I know that tonight isn't TECHNICALLY the same day, but to be honest, I think it will DEFINITELY be tomorrow before I go to bed. Or not I suppose. Possibly not til Sunday.
...and it all seemed like such a good idea at the planning stage...
So, one, we have plans. Two, we have them all on the same (more or less) day. Thank goodness it is only happening ONCE.
...but to start with, this morning, at 0530, I was wading through rose bushes, wearing a dressing gown, crocs and a grimace, trying to retrieve my cat who couldn't quite jump up to the window to get in. Lets see what happens during the rest of the day, shall we, children?
here kitty kitty
love
hazel
x
ps Missy, let your friend get it out of her system. From what you've written it appears that she sees you as a true friend...it doesn't mean she isn't interested in you, but needs to be a bit self absorbed for a little while...but yes, I do know EXACTLY where you're coming from! Hope the paddling is fun, and don't forget to put your hanky on your head!
pps MfR, give my love to Taylors Crescent x
ppps Gaby
hi chris how come women lose weight when they seperate or get divorced....what is that all about. i have a machine that controls me its called a laptop and one day ill find out how to put it to good use....
Yo Christoof & ALL Blog Dudes,
Bingo Star ere.
Firstly i'd just like to offer very BIG appologies for me blog comments yesterday about world peace.
I know it sounded too much like I was in a Miss World competition...... well not actually in it as a contastantint..... more as the host!!!
I don't think a bikini would suit me anyway. Visions of Mylene Klass pop inter the mind again.
CLP - What are you trying ter do ter me. The word cathartic is too big a word for me. I don't know what it means, as a result i'm being caused great tension trying ter find out what it means.
I'm gonna 'ave ter look it up in a dictionary.
But I don't own one so am gonna 'ave ter go ter me nearest library ter view it.
Which section of the library der yer think it might be in?
Plus I don't know were me local library is so gonna 'ave ter look it up on a map...... BUT I don't 'ave a map!!!!!
Christoof I can't take this tension!!!!!
PS - Wilsmar #52 comment on 31st. Very funny comment... made me laugh big stylee.
But i'm takin' yer advice seriously too. Hence i'm switching me big plan from baked beans ter....... JELLY BEANS!!!!!
PPS - I've got a friend, 'er nickname is 'Cherryberry'. I know realise thanks ter CLP's jellybean artical that this is were she 'as got the name from!!
BLOG FRIENDS.... you see just 'ow damn informative CLP's drivetime show is.
CLP - THANK YOU FRIEND!!!!!
Adios radio friends!!!!
Oh PS again - Coincidence, I was nearly gonna mention that about controlling the weather. Can't they make it snow nowadays, like at ski resorts. Couldn't they do sumit like dat ter stop the ice caps melting. Mind you ter snow it 'as ter be abit warmer than very cold. Yer know what point am tryin' ter say though CLP. Chow!
Hiya,
Re: wedding photographs - when I look at ours, my husband and me look like we were allowed out of nursery for the day, just to get dressed up and stand in front of a lovely cake! Was I ever that young? In order for me to be slimmer than my wedding photos, I'd have to be four years old! Ah, and blue eye shadow was sooo in, in 1976!
Missy - friends: a minefield. If she said she would go away with you, she should honour that. I can't tell you how many times this has happened to me - it really is pathetic. But we daft women do go a wee bit crazy when we meet someone we fancy and foolishly drop our friends. And yes, she should have asked you how you are. My train of thought is always "confront it". I think you should speak to her, not in an angry way, but explain how hurt you are. You are not being selfish. As for your men friends, just try to relax, not easy I know! Isn't it typical that you want No.2 but he's just at the "nice" stage? Keep it cool, the last thing you do is let him know just how interested you are!!
C xx
Good morning everyone.
I am in SUCH a good mood today. I feel briliant!
In two weeks' today (17th) I will be turning 39 - so happy berfday to me! (MFR - as a Leo, I shall probly 'bang on' about my berfday as much as Cuba - apologies in advance but that's the way it is!!)
Then at the end of the summer (september ish) I'm going to re-join a certain chubby club in an attmept to shed some pounds (quite a few to shed!) so that I can be 40 and fab next year.
Although Mr Diva is really sceptical about this plan!
Hey ho let's go!
CtD x x x
hi-de-hi bloggers...
...not feeling great his morning as I worked last night but can't seem to sleep? Gonna try to stay up a bit longer and then try again before I go back in tonight!!! Isn't it horrible when you 'try' to sleep?
Anyhoo - good news about my knee - I don't (at the mo') need it opened up and re-looked at. The physio is going to give me intensive work and a programme of stuff to do in between appts - and he hopes to have me 'pain free' within 4-5 weeks. Thank you all for the messages yesterday - very much appreciated x
martin - continued best wishes mate, the advice on here seems top notch, I really hope for the best for you.
HL - you've had me larfin' out loud this week....brilliant
missy - I must've missed the timetable for next week? Where n when are we all meeting for the birthday drinks?
.......or is it just a a select few ;(
If there is a weather operating machine somewhere for Norwich - thanks to whoever for setting the dial to hot hot hot today!
Have a great weekend everyone
KWx
Morning eejits.
What's all this then. Strawberry Airways, wedding diets, Russians controlling the climate, I spend a day on the road to nowhere that is the N6 to Dublin and back to Galway and look.
Can I say I did me bit for carbon footprinting by not havin' the heater on and avoidin' beans with me Full Irish.
As for the Russians with their weather machine, Christoffe really. Have you bin' to Siberia recently? Anyway, I don't trust them Russians. Especially in this weather when half of 'em are carryin' brollies. One Oops Sorry Missus up yer skirt from some chap called Igor and you're flat out deed. Come to think of it, it was the Vodka that did for me when I woke up in a flower bed with me vest on inside out and speakin' fluent Ukrainian after welcoming my rocket scientist friend and his missus back to Blighty last year. Wait till I see him next, fancy tryin' out 'is weapons of mass destruction on me just because I was a crap Nancy Sinatra to his Frank.
As for the Wedding Diet. I reckon everybody should install them mirrors like they have on Blackpool Pleasure Beach's Hall of Mirrors. How funny are they.
Leastwise when you're leavin' for the church and you clock your bridesmaids lined up like a row of melted candles with fuzzy wicks, you'll not know there's owt wrong.
I well remember when I used to make wedding dresses, one Saturday morning I had a distress call from a bride. Seems I'd used a dodgy batch of zips and there were 3 bridesmaids stood lookin' like busted summer puddings. So off I hared, 90 mph, with needle and thread, to stitch 'em into said frocks. The result was total hilarity, a good few extra champagne toasts and no nervous breakdowns; mind you, it wasn't an easy task at 3am the following morning when I had to cut said girls free after the day's frivolities and a skin-full of Tizer.
Every cloud has an acid lining, see.
Clodagh.xx
Oh yes by the way, marvellous news.
Over here the winner of the All-Ireland Air Guitar Championships comes from County Wicklow and is a ringer for Podge. Or Rodge. Not sure.
Anyway look out for HIM at the World Championships.
And if you're not familiar with Podge and Rodge, get yourself a DVD of the first series, and in particular the Hallowe'en Special Song by Fester and Ailin', called 'Never Stick A Banger Up Your Arse On Hollowe'en.'
...It's not funny, it's not clever and it's not good for the carbon footprint.
Clodagh.xx
So, Christophe, it would appear that I missed your show dedication last night...to all people having a hair cut?
Well, the badger and I BOTH got our hair cut last night. By our lovely friend the barber at his flat with the sea view. No room for a pony though.
Badger is being re-striped this evening as part of our preparations to delve into the rainbow pink underbelly of the weekend celebrations...
short back and sides
love
hazel
x
I heard a story that if you get up an hour earlier in the morning you can do 2 hours more stuff a day. I tried it for a while, and got up, went for walk, smiled at the bunnies and the rabbits, stood in awe at the waves and the clouds and then went home to do breakdfast.
However, I find that much as I appreciate the early morning sunrises and seeing bunnies and birdies and the clouds and the waves, I actually really love sleeping. My bed is so gorgeous, and of course, I'm in it, next to The One that I Love, which is the best place in the world to be. Everything else can wait!
On a side note, can everyone send good thoughts to my Wee Nunk? He's 84, and had been building himself into a right state about his holidays in Isle of Man (my cousin, his daughter lives there), and drove down to Heysham, got on the ferry with my wee nant and arrived. I spoke to them on Tuesday night and they were on a high, because they had had a fantastic drive down and treated themselves to a plate of chips on the boat..... and then, yesterday morning he went and had a bleeding heart attack!
He's okay (touch wood) right now - my cous says he is being sarcastic again, so he must be on the road to recovery, but a whole load of good thoughts heading in his direction will bring him home safely to us at the end of their holidays!
Cheers Folks
DWNB
Em M - hope you're okay....
....long time no blog?
KWx
Perhaps the Ruskies and Chinese have loads of spare underpant material to contol the weather because its always August in mine.?
Gingembre - good news about your knee. If surgery can be avoided, that's great. A lot of work with the physio lies ahead, but getting rid of the pain will make it all worthwhile! I wondered if EmM was on holiday, but you're right, it's been a while since we heard from her.
DWNB - sending positive thoughts to your lovely Nunk (how sweet!). Hope he gets home to you all soon.
C xx
Clodagh - who are you callin' an eejit?
LOL!! That's one of my fave words but always laugh when I direct it at someone!
Air Guitar Championships - a subject covered by Marian Keyes in (I think) her last book. Had me in stitches as her descriptives were so vivid you could see the expressions and grimaces through her writing!
Good stuff.
CtD xxxxxx
Gingembre- A very select few this year. All us Norfolk bloggers should meet up and drag Chris and the missus along with us!
Wow I never knew Meg Matthews was from Norwich!
DWNB, Your poor Nunk and on holiday too! Sending you and Nunk best wishes and good thoughts x
Gingembre, it's horrible isn't it. I seem to want to sleep when I shouldn't and can't, and then when I get a chance for an early night I stay up late. What's all that about?
Loving this sunshine, looks like the BBQ we're planning for the eldest's 16th birthday on Sunday is going to be ok!
Have a lovely day....
Deb x
If they can control the weather. Why is it always so cold?
hey Chris. Talking about Jelly Belly's yesterday, I had to go and buy some today. One reason was to have a friend try them. Thanks for reminding how great they are. There is a great candy shop in Ilkley that sells all flavors including "jalapeno pepper". Love listening to your show on our way home. Never had a jelly bean till you've had Jelly Belly's!!
MLH #30
To keep their vodka nicely chilled :-)
SJ, that is so spooky. I was just thinking that it was to stop the ice cubes in the vodka from melting! x
Ola boys and girls.
Gingembre, fab news about your knee.
Hazel - this twin/triplet thing just gets spookier and spookier - I LOVE crocs. In fact have just found out that a certain retail shop is going to be selling slipper crocs (really lovely and furry) so they're on my chrimbo list already - so exciting!!!
Missy, hope you had a lovely time beside the seaside, beside the sea today.
Well, I'm off on my jollidays for a week, so take care one and all. Oh and CLP & GOTS, not sure when the big day is but just in case you're off on your nuptials before I get back - a huge big MWAH to you both and lots of confetti!!!!!!!
xxx
OK, I'm obviously missing summit here.
Wot's CROCS???
I just thought they were the reptile-alligator things we saw at a croc reservation in Cuba?
Please enlighten me - I hate to miss out!!
CtD x x x
PS: I love all things pyjamary, slippers, fluffy etc etc xxx
CtD, Crocs is the coloured cloggie thingamajigs that loads of bods are wearing at the moment.
Real ones cost between £30-35 which is extortion especially as you can spend about a fiver and get ZACKLY the same and more pairs. They are possibly the lightest footwear in the world, and you can actually RUN on a pebbly beach whilst wearing them, and don't get stones in yer shoes either.
They really are truly ridiculously comfortable and definitely worth investing in. I've probably walked about a gazillion miles in mine since I've had them, and they don't seem to wear out either.
Enuff. Am not on rake off.
Will put in for Croc Slippers for Xmas list also.
Have a lovely holiday Tinsel, and anyone else off too!
and make it snappy
love
hazel
x
ps Gingembre, no hokeycokey-ing or Up Mother Brown-ing my lad. Have you had these knees long Sir?
Tinsel & HL - just to frighten you re: the twin/triplet thing, I've got some bright pink crocs which are like flip-flops - they're great!!
jillygoat x
...noooooooooo it's TIGERS that are
GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRREAT!
but the Crocs frighten them away...
Have lovely weekends all
love
hazel
x
I've seen something similar called Gekko's. Are they a cheap imitation of these Crocs then?
D x
HL - just the 38 years...
...and counting!
I've got a pair of those reptile shoes (gekko's I believe)...
...does this make us quadruplets now???
flapi
KWx
HL - thank you. I consider myself suitably filled in - I think I know egggsactly what you describe - I think they look like lego (other brick building toys are available ....)
Will have to investigate if they're THAT comfy. My tootsies go thru torture thanks to kitten heels and pointy toes. Today's shoes are PINK (missy - fab!!!!)
Have grand weekends everyone. I'll pass on your regards to His Purpleness tomorrow night - he's bound to espy me in the crowd of 20,000, right?!?
CtD x x x
PS: how can you just leave me standing alone in a world so cold?
PPS: Maybe I'm just too demanding!
the Americans can control the weather also! 1970 woodstock festival thet seeded the clouds to cause the rain over the beautifull festival of love peace and understanding.
But they couldnt stop the love could they!
great show Chris
steve xx
CtD. YOU, you awful Eejit, hurrah!!
Can't stop....Al Qaeda are waitin' for me in the bar and given the state of the Amy Winehouse hairdo that's less of a beehive and more of a wasps' nest I'll not be able to convince 'em I've bin doin' me hair. But I couldn't resist dippin' in.........
DWNB. Aw bless 'im. I do hope he's feeling ticketty boo now; I bet he's loving the attention.
I know how you feel though, having spent me entire Christmas in the hospital in Dublin with my 83 year-old Old Trout mum. Cost me a feckin fortune at the Westbury for Christmas, gave her a whistle-stop tour of Ireland, then back in Dublin on the last day she goes and does a Jonathan Edwards on Grafton Street and ends up in St. Thomas' hospital for 4 days. And guess what the highlight of the holiday was. The bleedin' hospital. She's never shut up since. Well next year I'm puttin' her on the boat, takin' her back to Dublin where I shall give her a right good kickin' and book her in for New Year this time.
Aaaargh there's me phone. Bottoms up one and all, have a blast and if you can't be good be careful.
And if you can't be careful, remember the date.
Clodagh.xx
How about "Burns the Bread" in Glastonbury