MOTORBIKIN' HOME TO MOMMA.
So, look the thing about me is...
... I always give it a go. that's what the sports teachers at school always used to say about me. I was "£$% at practically every sport but I so wanted to be good. Why I was no good at sport I have no idea but no good I was.
In other walks of life, the "having a go" attitude really does work, as so many people can't be bothered. Thus for anyone who can, there will almost certainly be a reward of some sort.
And so it was with me "having a go" at coming to work on my motorcycle yesterday.
The motorcycle, a more risky form of transport than the car but in many other ways a far more advantageous one.
My "bike" is a baby, it's only 125 cc in capacity and maybe not the best machine to navigate almost 60 miles on via one of the busiest dual carriageways in Britain, the wonderful A 3.
Getting to London was fine, going home - an entirely different matter. In short I nearly died, nothing to do with my abiltity to ride, or the reliability of the bike, or any inconsiderate other road users carving me up but simply because...
IT TOOK ME SO BLOODY LONG I NEARLY DIED OF STARVATION.
It was too dark, too rainy and too windy and I'm never doing it again. When the big bike comes alright but until then...
TAXI !
clp 2007.
x.
Comments
Elo CLP & ALL,
Bingo Star ere.
I'm so glad yer not gonna be using the bike everyday ter get in ter BC 'ouse.
I've read you often get the train via Waterloo.
Hence I was thinkin' of going ter Waterloo station armed with a pen & paper.
Not ter reingnite me days of train spotting but ter get yer ter sign yer graph.
It's the only way man, security at BC ' ouse won't let me in - know what am sayin'!!!!!
Mind you security at a railway station, if i'm seen 'anging around Waterloo station, as a train spotter, i'm likely ter get arreasted by MI5 and accused of working for Al Qaeda - more stress that I ain't need!!!
Chow!
PS CLP Any chance of playin' Waterloo Sunset by Elliott Smith or Artic Monkeys and On The Run From MI5!
Didn't I tell you. It just takes too long, and it's too cold.
I just had a go at eating some more Turkish delight! We have a box in the office and it is rather good. Especially the ones with Pistacios.
Yummy
DWNB
Hi Chris (and everyone)
Well, you are becoming such a wise owl, aren't you? At long last! Yes, absolutely no faffing about on that bike until you get the real McCoy! Must have taken you hours to get home - pet lamb.
I only managed to hear a wee bit of the show last night. Did the wee girl Tabitha (who could not remember a single bit of the song she had sung in the choir) call back? I felt so sorry for her, and for you, because you really wanted to hear her sing!
Hope everyone else is o.k. I really can't believe how fast this week is going!
C xx
What you need my friend is one of those foldable moto bikes that fold in to a taxi-boot; remember the Topgear guys had them when they tried their hands at London cabbies - though not sure theyd be that comfortable on a 40-mile journey to work!!!!
DB
It's so hot one and all
Maybe it's because........ I'm steaming tonight .. well stripping tonight well wall paper of course.
I'd stick to a Taxi Mr E far safer.
Is it possible in life that things run there course, what was important yesterday is no longer today. It messed with your mind for so long it sort of became an obession to seek and find an answer.
PC's behaving badly .... well perhaps.
Oh dear poor you, i can just picture you.
I keep sending these really hilarious messages in (OK they're not really but I can pretend can't I?) and they just keep vanishing. i can't have been BPed cos they're very inoffensive but....
So.... hi missy and gingembre and everyone else, hope you're all ok, I'm not too bad but a bit tired, will maybe try again tomorrow,
Em xx
FUNNY! .....you should have saved some of Jane Asher's cake for the journey! Or is that an offence? ....not eating whilst in charge of a bike......Jane Asher's cake......???????
Also not the best weather to start taking your small one out on the A3........ save it for a country lane on a sunny weekend.
JoJo
x
Right, that's it. I've sent three hilarious (no really!) messages over the last couple of days and none have appeared! I'm starting to get a complex now. One was about the novels of Jane Asher and I can't even remember what the others were about but I'm sure they were very interesting. Anyway this is my last attempt.
Em xx
You need your head testing for riding down the A3 on a 125! I often do the journey on my fireblade, and on a dark rainy night you need something big and fast or you just get blown into the gutter by the idiots in cars!
Hello,
CtD, I know exactly the place that you mention, it's in Chingford just outside of Epping Forest.
I've been racking my brains this afternoon, chewing the end of my pen was more useful! I'll blog you later with the places that sprung to mind x
Is it me or is the weather getting warmer again today? My boss suggested that maybe I'm going through 'my change'. Cheekly s*d!
Back later,
Love Debbie xx
PS. DWNB, I have just started on a box of turkish delight with hazlenuts. The chef where I work is turkish and brought some back with him. Loverly! x
Christoffe Namby Pie.
Hurrah bless yous, yous is like me good self in the school sports department.
Me, I was by a long chalk the worst sportswoman in the history of Upholland Grammar School; the only sport I would ever co-operate with was tennis. And I was crap at that, too;..BUT the best dressed. Hurrah. Frilly knickers, twizzy skirt, pom poms on the plimsolls, bloody marvellous.
Just couldn't hit an elephant's bum at 5 yards that's all.
And don't talk to me about hockey. The best friend Linder and meself used to have Womens' Problems every week to avoid it. In our defence, however, it was traumatic as the boys used to have to pass the hockey pitch via a ditch en route to the rugby pitch, meaning they were on eye level to the ground, and I won't go into what used to go on within said ditch. Suffice to say there used to be something of a haze over the area accompanied by the sound of guffawin' until the sports' master turned up with 'is whistle and 'is baseball bat, and it was dead tricky bullyin' off with one hand holdin' your skirt.
And this despite my coming from a long line of wrestlers on the Dear Departed Father Eric's side. Oh yes. Maybe it's all them Saturday afternoons at Grandma's watchin' one or other of the uncles flingin' Mick McManus round the ring that's given me the phobia.
I wonder if that's where the daughter gets her strength from. Only last night she picked me up and sat me on top of the kitchen cupboard till I gave in and lent her me Jimmy Choo bag.
So listen up. Get this 'ere blog sorted or I'll send her round.
Clodagh.xx
Em M- They same thing has been happening to me. The blog poice don't like me at the mo as my posts haven't been turning up. I'm fine thanks, hope you are to
I wasd never good at sport but wanted to be, same with art. I always had the ideas but when I drew anything it was awful. But then I tried different sorts of art. Like Photography and now knitting! Haven't felt too good today. My own fault for spending the afternoon with the fella yesterday. I think coz when I'm with him I almost get an adrenaline rush that I feel good and then boom it hits me that I'm worn out but silly me always try to keep a smile on my face when I feel awful all day! Never mind must stop moaning!
Hope you are all well. Christmas cards and decks are starting to pop everywhere. I LOVE it!! Hope you are all well, missy x
Look. Help me out here.
The psychopath cousin Barry is still at it.
And before I go any further, it most certainly was not me who texted the show earlier to say they are in love with their cousin.
He's still tryin' to fix me up with one of his accomplices who, as it happens, is a top bloke, a sweetheart, but trust me this is never gonna happen.
I've been gettin' texts all day both from said bloody nuisance and from the chap in question until I finally snapped and told him exactly where I am going to ram his phone, with appropriately colourful language enough to make Gordon Ramsay blanche.
He's just texted me back.
"Now then petal. That's not very nice. I am just with my father now, (my 93 year-old uncle) will let you know what he thinks of your message. He's just getting his glasses."
Some people just never grow out of adolescence. Well I've had it. I'm sendin' the daughter round.
Anybody know any hit men?
Bingo. Help.
Clodagh.xx
Chris, Why didn't you go the whole hog & take direct access? wouldn't be messing about on a 125.
Save it for the Summer Chris :)
x
Blogs broke....again
As a private hire driver I put it to all you bloggers and to Mr E that my comfy warm and air conditionned VW Sharan is much much much nicer to travel in than a horrible old taxi. In fact it is the ultimate way to travel possibly only topped by a similar vehicle but chauffer driven.
So there
JK Nonegreen
aren't the blog police/blog gremlins a pain???
Anyway, hope today finds you all fine & dandy. Got a lady coming round this morning to take piccies of our house as we're gonna sell and move (hopefully!). Just been touching up the paint work then tidy away the gazillion toys we seem to have. Once she's gone I have the task of the holiday ironing - aaarrrrgggggghhhhhh
Oh, then a 12 hour night shift tonight starting at 7pm - hmph
Supawelldone to Celtic, shame about the silly fan, hope it doesn't cost them any points.
OMG - the sun just re-appeared - wahay
Em M - hey you, hope you're well x
KWx
Morning all. I haven't been able to blog ALL WEEK!!! Hope this one gets through.
Missy, glad to hear all is going well with the man!! But no, please, no Xmas deccies yet!
Txxx
Ello, Ello, Ello Ter All,
Bingo Star ere.
Clodagh - If yer after a 'itman I can put yer in touch with me mate Bertwynd Hurricane.
e's 87 but VERY, VERY volatile..... especially if yer park uneven where 'e works part time at Birkenhead market car park...... frighten anyone just with a stare!!!!!!!!!
I'm glad ter 'ear with me ear that it's not just me 'aving problems posting on ere.
I thought it was just my computer gone ape.
BLOG TECH DUDES..... PLEASE FIX THE BLOG SOON!!!!!
ALL BLOG OPERATIVES..... I'VE FOUND 'OW ME POSTS SEEM TER GET THROUGH - AFTER YERV WROTE YER WRITTED BIT- CLICK ON POST. THEN THE BLUE COUNTDOWN LINE TAKES ABOUT 2-3 MINS UNTIL YER GET THE SORRY CAN'T DISPLAY PAGE PAGE ARRIVES. IMMEDIATELY CLICK BACKSPACE AND THE POSTIN PAGE NORMALLY COMES UP AND YER TEXT WRITTED TEXT POPS BACK UP.
THEN DO IT AGAIN - CLICK POST AND WAIT FOR THE BLUE MARKER TER COUNT VERY SLOWLY UNTIL YER GET ERRRR THE PAGE CAN'T BE DISPLAYED AGAIN OR 502 ERROR PAGE AND THE BLOG SEEMS TER ALWAYS APPEAR LATER!!!!
HOPE THIS 'ELPS BLOG FRIENDS.
PS SOMETIMES WHEN YER PRESS BACKSPACE THE STUFF YERV WRITTED 'AS GONE AND AGAIN IT SEEMS TER APPEAR ON THE BLOG!!!
PPS PLEASE GET THE BLOG FIXED SOON BLOG TECHS, BEEB TECHS OR CAN'T THE BEEB AFFORD ANY NOWADAYS DUE TER WRIGHTIE & SIR TEZZA LOGANS 'OLIDAY PAY DEALS... LOL!!!!!!!
ITS DAMN ANNOYING THIS GREMLIN IN THE SYSTEM LATELY - am tellin' yer, am tellinnnn'''' yer!!!!
Chow!
Hey Chris, and hey all you lovely Thirsty Thursdayers...hoorah! I had a WONDERFUL holiday thanks for asking...and BIG FAT THANK YOU to my lovely Mummy for taking me!
Christophe, motorcycling is only dangerous if you don't take care. You're only as wide as your bike, and as long as you look well ahead as well as behind and beside you, you'll be right as ninepence...and once you get used to your trip, it won't seem that long. It's just suffering from 'Bikers Lap' during wet weather...is a tad off-putting...especially if you have to walk somewhere afterwards. Chafing etc.
Anyhoo, it once took me 45 minutes to get from Crawley to Brighton (approx 23 miles for those of you who may care) on a wee 100cc machine...and I actually felt quite proud that I had accomplished this feat, and all without the aid of a safety net...until my uncle told me he used to be able to do it in 17...with Gran'ma in the side car. Sails. Wind. Gone.
On the other hand, I was relatively good at sports at skule, until I discovered it was SO uncool, all the running and suchlike, so I purchased ten No.6 and snuck off behind the tree.
I trust I find you all as well as can be expected?
love
hazel
x
JK...do you wear a hat and everything?
Morning all,
Hurray! Loving this sunshine! Me and little'un are just chilling this morning before he has school this afternoon. Then me and his dad are picking him up and we are all going to nanny's for tea. If the weather stays like this maybe we could pop to our local after and let him run around the garden there. Really wear him out!
Gingembre, so pleased to hear that you do ironing too. I'm sure Mr Debbie thinks that he is the only male on the planet that does it!
CtD, have blogged you, hope it helps!
Have a lovely day everyone, hope you're all well.
Love Debbie xx
PS. I am only going to press the 'Post' button once! x
Aha - I remember it well, the cold, the misery and they sliding along the road on my side with the skin being ripped off my leg - such joyful days.
xx
Well I've had one message get through so hopefully this one will do the same.
Christmas - Things i love - decorations (especially lights), food, nativity plays and carols.
Things I hate - having to spend time with and buy presents for people I'm not too keen on and who aren't very fond of me, having to buy presents for kids who get loads when I'd rather just buy for my own kids and my friends and family could just buy for their own kids. We have so many things (especially games) still in their boxes which will never be used. It just seems a waste. What do other people do when it comes to present buying? I must buy for nearly 50 people and its soul destroying.
Sorry for moaning. I really used to love Christmas but I've really gone off it in recent years.
Love from Scrooge xxx (As my husband calls me!)
Ah see bless you Bingo I knew yous'd be there with the name of an 'itman. Excellent.
Can 'e 'it a squirrel in the nuts at 30 yards? This would be marvellous news if so because I'd dearly like to stuff it and place it on Barry's headstone together with the words, "Here lies Barry. Sorely missed. Like most of his squirrels."
Clodagh.xx
Dear Scrooge (a.k.a. Em M #24)
Christmas-gift-buying is a real problem when you have a large family. And I would imagine you are not the only one feeling like this. Couldn't you have a word with your in-laws and your own immediate family and just agree on gifts for the children only? We agreed this years ago because it was just getting ridiculous, not to mention costing a fortune. Also, you start to run out of ideas, i.e. my husband received the same aftershave THREE years in a row from the same relative! I think she may have bought a job lot from Derek Trotter!
Good luck!
C xx
P.S. Hazel Love - good to see you back, glad you had a lovely holiday!
Em, I am so with you there. I used to love Christmas but the last couple of years I have felt the burden building up about.....now! When you still hope for a day where you can get the barbeque out and the supermarkets have an aisle dedicated to Christmas already.
And when you check the mince pies on that aisle you'll see that the sell by date is the end of October, what is all that about! Ridiculous.
In Mr Debbie's family there are nieces and nephews in their early twenties and they are working now. We all still buy for them when I think that we should agree to stop now. It get's so expensive and yes, I would rather spend the money on my boys. So, yes I suppose I'm scrooge too!
It was Christmas that my PND hit originally so don't suppose that helps.
Don't I sound miserable, sorry!!!
Hazel, glad that you had a lovely holiday, nice to see you back x
Love Debbie xx
Arfternoon chums. Happy Fursty Fursday one and all.
HL - welcome back babe - how are your white bits!?
Good result at chubby club last night - lost another 2.5lbs which takes my total to 8.5lbs in 6 weeks. Well chuffed! Now on a mission to shift that magic first stone by the end of October.
Christmas. Don't get me started! Can't wait. Very excited. Love it. I start to go into hyperdrive at the beginning of December. NOt a big fan of new year tho - always seems a bit of an anti-climax. Bit like last week's fish and chips!!
Stoooopid busy in the office today so I'll post this now (good job its not reliant on the royal mail!) then get back to that there grindstone.
Love you all, my luvlies.
CtD x x
OMG, the hellenic Hazel Love pops into the Sir Evans blog from her holibobs!
I have been listening to one of the shows from earlier this week, and imagine my surprise when Dave from Milton Keynes dissed the mighty Oasis and their new track! I would just like to point out to all that know me and that I live in Milton Keynes, this person was not I, I would never diss the Oasis, one 'cos I like their toons, but mainly because I like my teeth left in my mouth, and my Gluteas Maximus un-bruised.
Christophe, I have toyed many times with getting a m.bike and riding to work, apart from two things, firstly there are not enough herds of cattle to cover my copious frame in leather, and two it looks b. cold and dark in the winter! I have enough of an issue with the actions and omissions of other road users in my 4 wheeled transportation in relative safety, to avoid the two wheeled variety and additional risk to life and limb!
Fair play to you though for giving it a go!
DD out
PS Motorbikin, vroom!
Guten Tag one and all
Well the weather is almost as nice as Majorca today. Very busy with a full weekend of Special Birthday do's. Not before my trip up to London to see my special daughter. What to wear in this heat though... think it will have to be the purple mini dress and black plastic knee length boots.
Then off to Camden to buy some josh sticks and maybe some Christmas presents.
Have a nice day y'all.
All this talk of motorbikes.
Given me lack of prowess in the sporting arena and me sense of balance that owes more to Norman Wisdom than Jayne Torvill, the closest I've ever got to a motorbike is ridin' in the sidecar of the Dear Departed Father Eric's with me mother Renee while she banged unsuccesfully on the window tryin' to get 'is attention, Eric blissfully happy in the skid-lid and goggles, ignorin' 'er.
Happiest days of his life, he used to say.
However. I've just treated meself to a very tasty black leather biker jacket from Top Shop, and I look Bloody Gorgeous. Hurrah.
Just don't sit me on the pillion, I'd be off and wrapped round a tree at the first bend and besides, I'd never make it on in the first place in me skinny jeans and Louboutins.
It's the tennis story all over again.
Clodagh.xx
Ello Ter All Again,
Bingo Star ere again.
Clodagh - I'm vey sorry but me mate Bertwynd Hurricane 'e iz a born 'itman but when it comes ter little furry things e's an out n' out animal lover.
'e can often be found sittin' up in the trees of the local nursing 'ome feeding 'is nuts ter the squirrels.
Just last week a waz walkin' along under the trees when I suddenly 'eard "nutty nut..... nutty, nutty nut, nut...... nut nutty" comin' from above.
I looked up and all I could see waz a illuminuse yellow sock and a bright red sock 'anging from above with two big NCP boots attached.
(NCP - National Car Parks standard issue).
I immediately knew who it waz blog friends!
I shouted "yo Bertwynd man...... it's Bingo... ere"
Next thing 'e shouted "shut up, SHUT UP... yer frightenin' me DAMN squirrels".
So as yer can see, i'm afraid Clodagh, 'e's not the man for the job. 'e takes iz wildlife very seriously - know what am sayin'!!!!!
I've 'eard e's even a member of the RSPCA - Royal Society of Provention of Cruelty ter........ ACORNS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Chow!!!!!!!!
PS - I'm just off ter buy some nuts for my resident squirrels too!!!!!
Chris
Just seen the bad news (well for us listners) you are on holiday.
That means Mr Maconie for two weeks, Ohhhh Nooo.
No fun and games until you are back then.
Good afternoon bloggers
Sorry I haven't posted for a few days, as CtD would say I’m stoooopid busy :o)
Chris – Belated congratulations on passing your theory test xx Agree with the other bloggers save the bike for summer. I was cold just reading your post!
CtD & Wilsmar thanks for the dinner menus I would have invited myself round if you lived nearer hahaha…….just kidding :o)
CtD Congratulations on the weight loss……well done!
Gingembre – Glad you had a nice holiday, and what lovely thoughts/words you shared about MrsW. Good luck with the ironing!
Well done to Celtic, and Rangers they both had great results this week. As for the
Celtic fan, trust me he will be found and if we lose points he will be hung, drawn and quartered! Not by me of course (just incase Clodagh thinks I’m a hit woman hahaha) but he will get his comeuppance!
School sports, not my scene either but dancing well that was a totally different story. Couldn’t wait to finish school to get to my ballet, tap or ballroom classes. I still have all my medals and certificates, sad I know but hey ho!
Speaking of dancing – Strictly is back on Saturday, can’t wait love it!
Hazel Love – Welcome back, so pleased you had a lovely holiday xx
Missy – nice to see you, take care honey xx
Sammie – Thanks for the invite, likewise if you are ever in the Glasgow area. Hope things are more settled for you now xx
Bingo – You kept your wee visit to Scotland quiet until after the event! Hope you had a good trip.
Happy thirsty Thursday everyone! I’ve had an unintentional detox since my op but I made up for it at the weekend with a lovely bottle of Sauvignon! :o)
Take care all
Mary xx
Hi All & CLP
I just think you have picked the wrong time of year to start biking 60 Mile, come spring & summer it will be more of a pleasure. I so wish I'd taken my bike test. I just can't afford to start all over again, and age is not on my side.
Chris it seem's so long since we heard Marguerite Pattern on the show? it must be 9-10 months, please can we have the sweet lady back on a Thirsty / Grub Thursday. She is great, i went out and bought 2 of her books after hearing her last time.
Great Show.
Kev C
Just a dash in and dash out.
I've also been having 500 errors so nearly given up attempting to blog at all.
I went to hear the lovely Jez Lowe last night and he was brill.
Northern humour and song just can't be beaten and he did the Radio 2 Ballad programme.
If you ever hear of him appearing near you - go and hear him.
Phoenix out
(fingers crossed, toes crossed .... hoping, hoping)
Afternoon each
Off to my French class tonight with my darling daughter. Does anyone know how long it takes before I'll stop feeling like a rabbit caught in the headlights when the teacher speaks to me? Je ne comprend pas (I think) sums it up.
Beautiful afternoon here in the Lothians. I'm expecting an indian summer for my holiday in the Cairngorms at the end of October - it better not snow, I don't do snow on holiday.
Anne x
Bingo NO no don't be feedin' yer nuts to the squirrels!!!
Well, not the grey ones anyway, theys is vermin and you know what. They eat small birds. Oh yes.
If Barry catches yous at it 'e'll be linin' up the double-barrel Scousometer and bushack. Yous'll not sit down for a fortnight.
Achtung mate. Caelm down caelm down.
Mind you I like the sound of that NCP car park attendant up a tree. Tip us the wink as to where 'e is, I'll 'ave a whale of a time with me electrified cattle prod that I got from the Ploughin' Championships in Tullamore last week.
Clodagh.xx
One wonders whether Mr Dickens would have written 'A Christmas Carol' if I had died at Easter time?
I know I'm not in the right bit? Please can you help Warrington, to be more procise - Woolston. I am a mum of four children, love living here, have nearly always lived here.They want to close Woolston High School, the community will fold, people are pulling thier children (I will be one of them too after half term) even to the extent that children are being taken from the primary schools or even moving out of the area, so that their children wont have to go to Padgate High!I know you must get lots of begging people, but even if you know of anyone who can help us.We are in the process as a community of starting a fighting fund to enable us to get a barrister, because the handling of the case has too many grey areas!
Yours "What ever you can do!"
Rachel
The show is really great miss you when you are not on air but yes still tune in.
I have a friend is badly sighted and was listening one evening when you mentioned your restaurent in chiddingfold west sussex as this is on the way back home from Northamptonshire thought my friend and I would try it have we got the right place as when I asked I was told Chris does not own it anymore
The show is really great miss you when you are not on air but yes still tune in.
I have a friend is badly sighted and was listening one evening when you mentioned your restaurent in chiddingfold west sussex as this is on the way back home from Northamptonshire thought my friend and I would try it have we got the right place as when I asked I was told Chris does not own it anymore
Chris - you're a brave man to ride 60 miles.
(bike) Size isn't important when you commute into London; after years of motorcycle commuting in and around London, I would suggest that you confine your rides to fair weather and daylight. It's much more fun and safer too.