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Your News: A chin-up adhesive strip

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Jennifer Tracey | 07:00 UK time, Sunday, 22 February 2009

Do you snore?

Do you snore... especially during iPM's Your News slot? Sleep isn't the only topic that listeners choose to share with us in their one-sentence news snippets. Cat puke came up this week (if you'll forgive the imagery).

Send us your news in a single line by email or leave a comment below.

Here's the script from last week...

I started my new job today after being made redundant. Who says you can't get a job during an economic meltdown?

I was half way through my second hour of teaching at what is known as a Top University when I realised my dress was on inside out.

The cat has been sick on my keyboard. Judging by the contents, I'm happy that there's one less mouse around here.

Scattered Grandma's ashes in the park, had my clutch repaired for free, and started tests to see if eleven years of anorexia have left me infertile.

My wife and I rescued an elderly neighbour who had tried to commit suicide by turning on her gas oven and then going back to bed.

Trying to cure my snoring: going to sleep after spraying drugs down throat and nostrils, putting in a mouth guard and something called "a chin-up adhesive strip".

Lost my job, joining the thousands of others.

I mended holes in two gloves this week - not done this since 1983.

I have a Muslim lover. My family don't know. They hate Muslims.

I am not sure about this 'back to school at my age' malarkey - I have two essays and three practical reports to complete in four weeks' time.

The Village Hall Wine Club night was so successful that I cannot remember anything about it.

If you have a sentence of news you'd like to share with us this week, email us or leave a comment below.

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