This Is What We Do
Walking along a rain-swept street in Glasgow yesterday afternoon, I spotted a girl with a microphone standing in a shop doorway. I can only derscribe her appearance as 'drookit'. I was going to sweep past her with that grim, distracted expression that I perfected for those tabard-clad youngsters with clipboards. You know, those teenagers who try to persaude you to sign over the deeds of your house to a charity. Then I realised that the soggy spectre in front of me was one of our own researchers. It was Becca Smith, in fact, who I encountered only a few days ago at the recording of Let's Do The Show Right Here in Milngavie.
"Soundbiters this time, " she explained, cheerfully and damply, "I'm recording a vox pop for one of the rounds in the quiz."
I nodded sympathetically. The dreaded vox pop! How many times in my career have I been sent in to the streets to guage public opinion in this most unscientific and journalistically bankrupt style? As a young radio reporter the instruction to "get your coat on and go ask people what they think" usually came because there was no other way of illustrating a story - no one else was prepared to speak.
I remember once being sent out to Clydebank shopping centre to find out what people thought of the Royal Family. This, I think, was on the day that Sarah Ferguson was all over the newspapers because she'd been photographed having her by a close friend (as you do). With no Royal-watchers or toe specialists available in time for the lunchtime news bulletin, I was sent to ask Clydebank shoppers for their views.
Eventually I found myself wandering by the canal where a trio of red-nosed wine connoisseurs where taking turns to sample a fresh new vintage in exactly the way that doesn't. So what did they think of the Royal Family?
"Chop all their heads off, " was the collective view and this was followed by detailed suggestion on what should be done with the left-over body parts. This formed part of the piece that I eventually put on air. It was, I reasoned, an authentic point of view from members of the public. I had a duty to include it.
Until, that is, others members of the public started calling in to complain.
Of course most of them were sober.