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I'll Never Be On The A-List

Jeff Zycinski | 00:49 UK time, Thursday, 12 July 2007

One of my favourite bloggers, the Dilbert cartoonist , has really put a crimp in my day.

He's been quoting (which originally appeared in a Daily Telegraph article) which seems to suggest that people with surnames near the start of the alphabet are more likely to be successful than those with surnames near the end of the alphabet.

That's fine and dandy for Scott Adams, George Bush and Billy Connolly but not so good for the Zycinski clan.

And you know, this theory rings true. I'm thinking back to my schooldays. My name was always last to be called from the register. I was last in line for the school nurse and probably got the final dribs and drabs of the polio vaccine.
I was last to be issued with school reading books and always got the dog-earfed copy that had belonged to that boy with the nose-bleed problem. I think his name was Eddie Zipp.

This discrimination carried on throughout my life. In the days when people actually kept little address books, they would often use the 'Z' page for shopping lists, based on the belief that they were unlikely to need it for an actual person.

That must have been why they forgot to invite me to all those parties.

Now it all makes sense.

Thanks a lot, Scott!



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