Your Letters
Re: Sheryl Crow's proposal of a limitation on how many squares of can be used in any one sitting. How much toilet paper is she allowed to use when she talks out of her backside?
Dan Abrey, Oxford, UK
In reference to Sheryl Crowe's advice on limiting ones use of , I've not used any today as I've printed out her blog and used that instead. I'm sure she'll regret her one sheet policy the morning after a curry.
Michael, Leicester, England
Who is Sheryl Crow to tell us how much to use! "One square per restroom visit, except, of course, on those pesky occasions where two to three could be required." I can only assume that the celebrity-worthy toilet paper she buys is a lot thicker / more absorbent than the rest of us are accustomed to. It's probably hand-embroidered as well.
Richard, Basingstoke
Cheryl Crow calls for a limit on use. While I have absolutely no reason to doubt Ms Crow's sincerity, she might perhaps enlighten we breathless minions as to how this particular regulation is to be enforced?
Angus Gafraidh, London UK
Maybe daughter Ireland would have more respect for her father if he had given her a sensible name.
MJ Simpson, Leicester, UK
would be a poor choice for a new Bank Holiday because we already have two in March or April and another two in May. It would be better to have one in the autumn, which needs cheering up -- how about 5 November?
Stephen Turner, Cambridge, England
Regarding average Britons having sex 4,329 times, who among us did the sums to work out if we're above average. I presume this is in a lifetime and not a year otherwise I'm way behind.
K Walker, Runcorn, UK
Over what period of time am I meant to have sex 4,239? I need to know whether I can take it easy for a while, or whether my wife will be thinking of England rather more often than usual.
John Whapshott, Westbury, Wiltshire, England
It's always satisfying when items in 10 Things make some kind of sense with regard to demographic trends. This week, we learn that Brits have sex 4,239 times, though presumably this is falling given the apparent greater attractions of chocolate, which in turn would be consistent with the need for the increase in coffin sizes. Whether or not this has anything to do with termites being cockroaches remains a mystery.
Steve, London
I am proud of your magazine, follow your way.
Haileyesus Teferi, Addis Ababa, Ethiopia