Paper Monitor
11:56 UK time, Friday, 22 June 2007
A service highlighting the riches of the daily press.
After splashing out yesterday's Financial Times - now a whopping £1.30 - Paper Monitor is feeling a little light in the pocket today. And down in the mouth too - not only have we passed the longest day, but our good friend and colleague Punorama has swanned off to wallow in the mud at Glastonbury.
But no-one likes a moaner, so it's time to buck up. What nuggets might bring a smile to Paper Monitor's face?
The Times reports that the nights aren't in fact drawing in - yet. "As the Sun reaches its northern limit, above the Tropic of Cancer, it teeters a bit before turning round."
The paper follows this up by printing a picture of George Clooney in his swimming trunks. He looks very fetching, for those who like that sort of thing, and for those who don't, the accompanying article paints him as a Nimby. Something for everyone.
Not so in T2. Continuing its push to appeal only to parents who live in leafy suburbs and follow a variety of religions in order to get little Tarquin and Arabella into the best schools, today's lead feature is headlined: "WHY FOUR CHILDREN IS THE NEW STATUS SYMBOL".
To further induce choking on a chocolate pastry (calorie offsetting its healthy breakfast of porridge topped with strawberries), the piece quotes one mother as saying: "For women, it reinforces just how super they really are: four children, a size 10 and still got balls in the boardroom."
Meanwhile, the Daily Mail has what surely must the headline it's been waiting a decade to write: "CHERIE, THE LAPDANCING BOSS IN THE PINK SUIT, AND HER VISIIT TO HIS 'EROTIC NIGHTCLUB'." How the subs must have salivated when handed that picture...
And, still not beaming quite broadly enough, we turn to the Daily Telegraph. What a bonanza. Not only is it Paper Monitor's one true love (if only it knew), page three has a story about words (our second one true love). And not just any words, but the "10 most irksome words spawned by the internet", a list which includes blogoshere.
Ah, treat 'em mean, keep 'em keen. Paper Monitor is undone.
The 
