Your Letters
Interesting as a sounds, what if something interesting were to happen on, say, the west side of the building? If everyone rotated their flat in the same direction simultaneously, I can see it going the way of Pisa pretty quickly.
Edward Green, London, UK
Is it the definition of irony that my employer, a major UK defence contractor, offers an ethical pension scheme that "will not invest in defence related security"?
Anon, England
If the Large Hadron Collider actually does result in the planet being , how long do we have to sue before we are compressed into the singularity, and are there any lawyers who specialise in damage to entire planets caused by this sort of situation?
Nigel Macarthur, London, England
Re . That'll be the day.
Martin Ruck, Oxford, UK
I can see Parrot Problem 1 () added to Parrot Problem 2 () and you get a solution. Who's a pretty boy!
John, Wigan, England
? Huh! When I was in the cub scouts, our scout assistant used to take most of the cub football team in his open top three wheel Bond. I'm sure we managed eight or nine plus the driver (with only two seats, as I recall) in the 1950s.
Richard Swailes, Woodford Green
Might I suggest that there is no way on God's good green - or sludgy watery brown - Earth that a tent is going to float, regardless of how well it is fashioned into a boat, makeshift or otherwise (). A slight mis-remembering of the event do you think?
Kevin, Derby
To Christy from Chicago (Tuesday letters), with regard to your second point, bees and wasps weigh considerably less than red-wing blackbirds and both are more than capable of inflicting pain. When it comes to creatures inflicting hurt, nature proves that size really doesn't matter.
PS, Newcastle, England
Christy, a rifle bullet weighs one eighth of a red-wing blackbird. It isn't necessarily the weight, it's the speed too.
Mark Esdale, Bridge
With Paper Monitor's stylistic preference for using uber, as in uber-coach, uber-writer and uber-fans, shouldn't it have been uber-pants (Quote of the Day)?
Simon Rooke, Nottingham, UK
I wonder if that joker, Adolf Hitler (Quote of the Day), was making a punning reference to the abermensch (I am assuming his joke in German used unterhosen and aberhosen). The abermensch is a philosophical concept used in part by the Nazis to justify eugenics and the Final Solution. How droll. Those long evenings in the bunker must have flown by.
Adam, Belfast, UK
Re - "Lexus chain store massacre". Where's Punorama when you need it?
TG, Belfast
So, Kieran Poynter was put in charge of investigating the HMRC data disc loss. Rather disappointingly, I personally think that Kieran's brother, Fynger, should have been given the job.
Christian Cook, Espom, UK
Why is it that I almost always get the right, yet I have never once managed to answer seven questions correctly in 7 days 7 questions - perhaps I buckle under the pressure?
Chick, Gatwick
Paper Monitor prefers Tom Jones to Thom Yorke? Well, it's not unusual.
Adam, Belfast, UK