Paper Monitor
A service highlighting the riches of the daily press.
Paper Monitor is a little miffed. Did it miss the call to Monitor Towers from the people at Collins looking for celebrities to champion little-used words at risk of being left out of the dictionary?
You just can't get good help these days. The PA at Monitor Towers - whose cousin is Punorama - has the hump and so rarely, if ever, passes on messages. That must have been what happened. Otherwise Paper Monitor would be signing up to further the usage of "recrement" (waste matter, refuse, dross) or "fatidical" (prophetic) or even "muliebrity" (condition of being a woman). Well, maybe not that last one.
Reading about the star recruits in the Times begs several questions. What does Christine Bleakley, the comely presenter of The One Show, have that Paper Monitor does not have? Or Stephen Fry, himself a plumpious morsel, for that matter.
Humpf. Or should that be hur-RUMPH. Paper Monitor would ask the word boffins at Collins, but has got the monk on. So sharn't.