Paper Monitor
13:17 UK time, Friday, 25 June 2010
A service highlighting the riches of the daily press.
Yawn! What a lovely sleep... so refreshed, much more so than usu - argh! Is that the time? Slept through the alarm, and then some. So sorry.
Right.
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[Shuffling of newsprint]
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[Gurgling of coffee machine]
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[Human moment in bathroom]
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[Glugging of chai chilli soy latte]
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[Spitting out of chai chilli soy latte. Slurping of espresso]
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Where were we? So, with England due to face Germany in the footyball on Sunday - has a brain-teaser on what the stats predict for this clash - the traditional sniping between the Sun and its Teutonic counterparts is well underway. (Also see )
"Ze media war is just beginning - Germans launch blitzkrieg on our 'lame little girls'" - thunders the Sun's older sibling, the Times, noting that "for once, the German tabloids have been even more childish than their British counterparts".
"'Yes!' said the splash in the Berlin tabloid BZ, 'Now we are going to sort out the little English girlies.' Girlies, like Wayne Rooney. 'He's still waiting to score in the World Cup and he's a long way from top form. They're really lame, these Three Lions.'"
But the Times predicts the British headline writers will fight back:
"Whole generations of newspaper sub-editors, brought up on Commando Comics, Biggles and Hogan's Heroes, reach for German phrases as headline fodder: Hände hoch! (Hands up), Kaputt (broken), Fritz ( Fritz) and variations of the words Huns and Jerries."
So what have the red-tops come up with today?
"GERMANS WURST AT PENALTIES" - the Sun
"HERR WE GO AGAIN" - Thursday's Sun
"Job done... now for the Hun" - Thursday's Daily Star
"Pasta la vista baby!" - today's Star, gloating as Italy crash out
No doubt there's more in the tank for Saturday, Sunday, Monday...
The 
