Paper Monitor
A service highlighting the riches of the daily press.
It's a pun-fest in the papers, thanks to two stories that simply beg the sub-editors to razzle-dazzle us with their word wizardry (and a treat for those readers who miss Punorama).
First, there's THAT dress:
"GAGA LOOKS OFFAL" - Sun
"MEAT IS MADDER" - Guardian
"CUT OF GAGA'S DRESS STUNS ACTIVISTS" - Daily Express
"GAGA LOOKS LIKE A DOG'S DINNER" - Daily Mirror
"LADY GAGA RAISES THE FASHION STEAKS - AND MAKES MINCEMEAT OF EVERYONE ELSE" - Times
Then there's the return to the Man Utd team of the man with the most versatile surname in Fleet Street.
Rooney is a word mangled to cover multiple syllables such as re and you. Hence...
"I'VE GOT NO ROOGRETS" - Sun
"SHOW 'EM WHAT ROO CAN DO" - Daily Star
And in the Coleen and Wayne saga, we've got:
"ROO-UNITED" - Sun
"I WILL HAVE ROO BACK" - Mirror
Have we forgotten anyone?
Oh yes, the Independent, which prefers to use the Ronseal Method and just tell it like it is:
"FERGUSON: ROONEY READY TO RETURN"