Your Letters
"Ms Chasen, who worked on such films as Driving Miss Daisy the 1994 remake of Lolita" (Ronni Chasen murder: Film festival offers reward). Hmm, I'm going to have to watch that film again - I thought it was about some old fella driving around some old lady in a posh car. Obviously I missed something.
JennyT, NY Brit
I hope that "[John] Lydon, nee Rotten" (Paper Monitor) would be more amused than offended at having his gender reassigned - the masculine of "nee" is of course "ne".
Toby Speight, Scotland
No, no, no, Paper Monitor! "Lydon, nee Rotten" is about-faced - since "nee" literally means "born" and Johnny was not always Rotten. Perhaps "aka" might have been more appropriate. I'll get my studded leather jacket.
Shiz, Cheshire, UK
Monitor note: Have you two met? If not, Shiz, this is Toby.
The secrets of Britain's abandoned villages - sad. Loved the poem.
Cindy Eve
There was a village of concrete houses in Haverigg, Cumbria. They were named Concrete Square and had been built to house iron ore miners in the 1870s. Bulldozed in about 1970.
George Harris
Did anyone else read Apparently an Official Fatty's address as Munch, rather than Munich (Wednesday letters)?
Basil Long, Nottingham
Sue, who suggested a royal registry office wedding followed by bowls of cheesy footballs in a Windsor pub (Wednesday letters), I had a registry office do last week. Us and two witnesses, then off to the hotel next door for food, then to the in-laws for a party. No stress = perfect.
Alexis Stewart
I remember cheese footballs - oh happy memories.
Jenny Mackenzie
Desk-fast sounds far too clumsy - I use "al desk-o".
Rachel, Wayzata, US
Aha! (Loudly with a flourish, which I can't portray with punctuation marks alone.) The ´óÏó´«Ã½ asked me to complete an online survey about Magazine Monitor, which I wouldn't normally do because only sad people do that sort of thing, but it gave me the opportunity to tell on you.
And I told Sir that you are getting later and later with your letters and it probably means that you are being paid too much and are staying out late at night and sneaking into work a couple of hours after everyone has started, and now I feel a bit bad about being a sneak, so you may want to get into work on time tomorrow and look busy for a bit.
Sorry.
Richard Martin, Queuing, Just outside Westminster Abbey
Monitor note: Already?