Paper Monitor
11:38 UK time, Friday, 11 February 2011
A service highlighting the riches of the daily press.
Firstly, Paper Monitor is pleasantly noticing today's palindromic date.
It's also hard to avoid the conclusion that this is football tattoo day.
The Daily Mirror has a big shot of Liverpool and Denmark defender Daniel Agger's back. And it is quite a decoration he sports.
It's dominated by a number of bloodthirsty looking Vikings, wearing horned helmets. But as any fule kno (or QI viewer, or GCSE history student), Vikings probably didn't wear horned helmets in battle.
Still, it's a formidable piece of ink, topped with a graveyard full of Viking heroes, including perhaps the most famous Dane to make a big money transfer to England, King Canute.
The slogan is "mors certa, hora incerta", which idiomatically translated means: "Death is certain, so avoid spending too much time in Runcorn".
The paper also features the Beckham back tat, Djibril Cisse's elaborate chest and Stephen Ireland's distinctly dodgy wings.
Over in the Sun, they have. Actually, it's better because they identify all four of the famous Viking graves depicted.
Also in the Sun, there's the revelation that that says Ma Vie Mes Régles can be translated as "my life, my periods".
It's supposed to mean rules but it has a double meaning. And he got the accent on the "e" the wrong way round. Return to your Tricolore, dunderhead.
But the Daily Star has perhaps the most poignant football tattoo of all, illustrating a piece about the lengths football fans go to to see their teams.
They feature a picture of a Jordanne Doody sporting a cursive "West Bromwich Albion FC" on her stomach.
Grinch of the day award goes to the Sun, who use the approach of Valentine's Day to do suspected cheating men.
She's paid by suspicious spouses to go up to their husbands and flirt with them to see if they'll crack.
Hope you have a happy one too.
The 
