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Paper Monitor

11:33 UK time, Friday, 22 July 2011

A service highlighting the riches of the daily press.

Paper Monitor always has a grudging respect for journalists who use their own private lives as material for their work.

It's quite one thing to have your thoughts on Eurozone contagion or anti-social behaviour in Rotherham splashed across the newspapers. But it's quite another to have your innermost private thoughts manhandled by subs and spread all over the feature pages.

In the Daily Mail, . Talking about meeting up again with her first love after 33 years. She's blunt, to say the least.

"He was probably 5st heavier than when I had last seen him, carrying a lot of extra weight around his face and midriff. His hair was grey, and he was sporting a half-baked beard which, I assumed, was there to hide his jowls."

OK, so at this point Paper Monitor is wondering if Rosie Knight is this feature writer's real name. And if jowl disguise man is reading. He is named as Tom. It's safe to guess he wouldn't be pleased.

There's also an anecdote about the first love inviting Rosie back to his posh house to have a swim in his pool while his wife was away.

Staying with the Mail. The website has being sold to American and British soldiers. The Queen and Osama Bin Laden are represented.

There's a bit of controversy from commenters at the bottom. But Paper Monitor, who knows a thing or two about chess, can only notice that the bishops and knights are too similar.

On to the front page of the Sun, there's a literary reference. Their coverage of the new bailout for Greece. It's "Grecian earner". Paper Monitor wonders how easy it is to make the link to Keat's Ode on a Grecian Urn.

Paper Monitor, in any case, derives more enjoyment from the pun on the main story inside the paper.

"I owe youzo."

Oh, you're spoiling us.

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