Paper Monitor
10:11 UK time, Monday, 12 November 2012
A service highlighting the riches of the daily press.
Heads will roll - how many times have we heard this in the news over the past couple of days? Type it into Google news and you'll get the point.
The Sun, however, manages to put the phrase to use in the context of the Tower of London and the story of how apparently including ones to unlock the drawbridges. Thousands had to be spent on changing the locks.
The paper's sub-editors were clearly enjoying this one - with many a historic Tower-based pun. Bungling guards were "facing the chop". "Off with his head" blasts the first line of an editorial on the opposite page, before the rather painful: "Clearly they need to beef up security."
A box in the story informs readers that the Bonfire Night burglary was "not the first Bloody time" this has happened. In 1671, a "mallet-wielding Irishman" [Paper Monitor did initially read this as "mullet-wielding"] Thomas Blood nicked the Crown Jewels. He didn't get away with it. Take a look at the engraving of him that accompanies the story and you might want to read that as "mullet-wearing".
While we're on the subject of puns, turn to page 25 and you simply won't be able to miss the: "Dude gets nude to paint food" strap above a .
"Van Scoff" shouts the headline. And how did the subs arrive at it?
Got to be something to do with the artist's name, surely. He's going to be called van something. Nope, he's called Tjalf Sparnaay - but he is Dutch like that other famous Dutch artist.
So the connection is made, and a reference is written in: "And rather than paint nudes like Van Gogh, he likes to portray everyday objects - food in particular - while in the nude himself.
It's an art that headline writing, it really is.
The 
