Paper Monitor
13:08 UK time, Tuesday, 11 December 2012
A service highlighting the riches of the daily press.
Contrasting approaches to covering Europe today. With one thing in common.
The Sun offers the views of Danielle, 21, from Grimsby in its News In Briefs column aka Page Three. Danielle hits out at the largesse of Brussels bureaucrats who we're told are spending £340,000 of British taxpayers' cash on eco traffic lights in Mauritius.
"The author PJ O'Rourke was right when he said, 'Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys.'"
Thanks Danielle. Or Sun sub-editor acting as Danielle.
The Daily Mail reports in which he describes his approach to Europe as "tantric". Even the PM knows that Europe needs a bit of sexing up for a domestic audience.
"This is a tantric approach to policy-making - it will be even better when it does eventually come," Cameron is quoted as saying. He adds: "That wasn't in the script.'"
Ooo-er missus.
Benedict Brogan's column in the Daily Telegraph takes its cue from this: "," goes the headline.
Scour the piece for sex - tantric or otherwise - and you'll be disappointed. Not even a soupcon of Herman van Rompuy, president of the European Council, whom the tabloids know as Rumpy Pumpy.
An online reader comment sets Mr Brogan straight on his analogies. "It's not tantric activity that's needed, it's coitus interruptus."
Clearly, sex and Europe are a painful mix for some readers.
The 
