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Archives for May 2005

In Touch: the opera

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Crippled Monkey | 00:00 UK time, Tuesday, 31 May 2005

No, Peter White hasn't taken up singing. This is just advance notice that Radio 4's In Touch has a guest presenter on Tuesday 14 June, when blind soprano and Operatunity winner takes over the microphone. Crippled Monkey assumes she'll be speaking rather than singing.

Zatoichi? Anyone?

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Crippled Monkey | 00:00 UK time, Tuesday, 31 May 2005

On my way into ´óÏó´«Ã½ Ouch Towers this morning, I found myself thinking, "Damn, there just aren't enough Japanese movies featuring blind albino samurai swordsman who can also give a good massage on the side".

So you can imagine my surprise when - in one of those moments where you're browsing the net and click on a a link to another link via yet another link - I discovered that exactly such a movie exists! It came out last year, and it's called . According to the review by our colleagues on the ´óÏó´«Ã½ Movies site, it "[refuses] to explain the blind swordsman's remarkable skill with a blade" - quite right too, let's just accept it as a fact that all blind people are experts in the art of samurai sword-fighting, shall we? - but it does feature "artery-spurting violence in grisly detail". If you're a younger reader of Ouch, you should also note that it's an 18 certificate and "contains strong bloody violence". Nevertheless, I'm intrigued. Has anyone seen this movie? Should we be classing Zatoichi as a new disability hero of the silver screen?

(Insert hilarious one-legged joke here)

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Crippled Monkey | 00:00 UK time, Tuesday, 31 May 2005

I know that the media tends to love stories where really obviously disabled people come up against ridiculous treatment from those in authority, and that I, Crippled Monkey, probably shouldn't be encouraging them. Still, a story from yesterday's Daily Mirror does provide a classic example of this, with the headline: . When it came time to renew his disabled parking badge, Ron Craig, who is an amputee, was asked by his local council to provide medical proof that he still only has one leg. Ron, from Shipley in West Yorkshire, is obviously a master of understatement, as he was reported as saying: "I can assure them that my leg has not grown back". Ouch salutes you, Ron.

The future of disabled loos: revealed!

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Crippled Monkey | 00:00 UK time, Monday, 30 May 2005

Right, enough of this weblog tittle-tattle. Let's get to the really important issue: toilets. Researchers at Vienna's Technical University in Austria have been working away in their labs day and night, and have just unveiled a new loo - a super-loo, a loo to beat all loos - intended for people with MS and other disabled folk. This toilet adjusts itself to the user's, um, 'dimensions' either via a smart card that is inserted upon entering the toilet, or using voice-recognition technology. So far, so Tomorrow's World.

But it's the headline for this story - in the technology section of CNN.com - that really gets me: .

Does that sound as scary to you as it does to me? I'm really not sure that I'd like to use a toilet with a brain. What if it malfunctioned? What if it started talking back? What if it rebelled, like HAL in 2001: A Space Odyssey? And lastly: am I worrying about this a little too much?

The new disability minister reads Ouch!

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Crippled Monkey | 00:00 UK time, Friday, 27 May 2005

Geoff Adams-Spink, the Disability Affairs Correspondent for the ´óÏó´«Ã½ News website, has just been to an event marking the first anniversary of Scope's Time To Get Equal campaign, which included the launch of a report on independent living. Anne McGuire, the new Minister of Disabled People, was also there - and she revealed that she reads Ouch! Find out more about the report (and what Anne had to say about your favourite disability website) in Geoff's article, which is in our Behind the News section.

Oh, and a big Crippled Monkey hello to you, Anne, if you're reading.

Accessible movie round-up

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Damon Rose Damon Rose | 00:00 UK time, Friday, 27 May 2005

Planning on going to the cinema this holiday weekend? Don't forget that more and more of Britain's movie theatres are getting all accessible, with subtitles and audio description now added to a lot more movies than ever before.

Take a look at to find whether your nearest flea pit supports subs or AD. You can also discover what accessible movies are showing where.

Some of the accessible films around the UK right now include: Star Wars Episode III, The Pacifier, House of Wax, Kingdom of Heaven and The Hitch-Hiker's Guide to the Galaxy.

For audio described Bank Holiday movies on TV this weekend, take a look at both and the websites. The latter also has info about signed programmes.

The signed movie on Sky Box Office this week is: I, Robot.

Blogwatch

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Crippled Monkey | 00:00 UK time, Friday, 27 May 2005

Time to see what's happening out there in the wonderful world of disabled bloggers. Today, we're sending you to check out a brand new site that's only been going for a few days - it's called , and it's the blog of Katie, who lives in Hertfordshire. She says: "Can you imagine what it's like to live with a learning difficulty and to have a mind filled with lots of different opinions, feelings and ambition? Read my blog and you will see". And we're really not being swayed by the fact that Katie calls Ouch "my best favourite site ever" - although we do like compliments. Lots of compliments. The more the better, in fact. But before you say nice things about us, pop over to Katie's blog and say hi.

The OCD House and other TV shows

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Crippled Monkey | 00:00 UK time, Thursday, 26 May 2005

Channel 4 announced their new season of programmes yesterday. One programme that jumped out at us was one provisionally entitled The OCD House. Here are some more details direct from the press release:

"Three people with extreme obsessive compulsive disorders (OCDs) agree to live together as part of a ground-breaking experiment in an attempt to cure them through a new kind of group therapy.

"Wendy Johnstone hasn't shared a bed with her husband or even touched her twin children for five years, confining herself to one room in her home which no one is allowed to enter. Gerard McAree is terrified of any human contact for fear he might incriminate himself. He can't leave phone messages, refuses to write anything down and walks around in public with a mouthful of water to stop himself from talking. Sophie Prossmer spends three hours a day washing her hands and can't bring herself to walk on grass.

"Over the past 20 years, all three have tried medication, assorted therapies and even contemplated lobotomy in order to rid themselves of their OCDs. In this last ditch attempt at salvation, they agree to share a house in London and put themselves in the hands of a team of therapists from the Psychiatric Unit of London's Maudsley Hospital.

"Wendy, Gerard and Sophie's journey to overcome the debilitating effects of their illness proves more intense and surprising than anyone, including their doctors, could ever have imagined."

The OCD House is due to air some time before the end of August.

While we're on the subject of that other big public service broadcaster, they have a couple of other shows that feature disabled people over the next 7 days. We thought you'd like to know about them:

Sunday 29 May, 11.00pm: DV8: The Cost of Living - the 'legless dancer' stars in cerebral dance drama production that has toured round the world and now comes to TV. Set in a Norfolk seaside town, it features a series of inter-linked scenes and striking dance vignettes that show the main characters' encounters with other people living on the fringe.

According to one commentator, the title refers to: "the price we pay for competing in a society obsessed by image."

Tuesday 7 June, 9.00pm: Make Me Normal - Documentary. Follows four children at the Spa School for autistic children. Moneer (12) has Asperger's Syndrome, and reacts violently to the death of his mother. Roy (18) is in his final year at school and wants a girlfriend. Roxanne (12) wants to be normal and finds it painful coming to terms with the condition. Esther (18) has a special gift for explaining the autistic world. (text taken from Radio Times).

Have walking stick, will dance

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Crippled Monkey | 00:00 UK time, Thursday, 26 May 2005

Great new article in our Features section today, as Ouch favourite Kate Ansell finds out whether being a groovy socialite CP'er about town is compatible with attending Salsa classes. Yes, that's right, Salsa - complete with all the fancy footwork. It's like Strictly Come Dancing all over again, innit? Could Kate be the new Natasha Kaplinsky?

Mind the Archers

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Crippled Monkey | 00:00 UK time, Thursday, 26 May 2005

A big shout out for our colleagues over at ´óÏó´«Ã½ Radio 4 (where they probably don't use phrases like "a big shout out", but never mind), where the long-running soap The Archers has won the Champion of the Year award for 2005, which is given by the mental health charity for the person or group making the biggest contribution to challenging the stigma surrounding mental health problems. Storylines praised by the charity included Helen Archer's eating disorder and gamekeeper Greg Turner's depression.

It's not the first time that The Archers has won plaudits for its mental health portrayals, either. Last year, the Greg Turner storyline scooped the Soap and Drama Series category prize at the Mental Health Media Awards. Not being an Archers listener myself, I'd be interested to hear your thoughts on how the series tackles the subject.

Some myths about web accessibility

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Vaughan | 00:00 UK time, Thursday, 26 May 2005

Quite often when we post stuff about web accessibility here, we say something about it being for the techies and geeks out there, but that it might also be of interest to everyone - after all, you're using the interwebnet superhighway thingummybob to look at this site, aren't you? This latest link is no different - so do take a look at a new entry on the blog , which goes under the title Accessibility myths and misconceptions. Roger Johansson, the writer, tackles commonly-held beliefs such as "Accessibility is just for blind people", "Offering a text-only version is good enough", plus a particular favourite for us here on Ouch - "Accessible websites are ugly and boring". No, they're not - or at least, they shouldn't be. (Link via )

Disabled actors: who needs 'em?!

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Crippled Monkey | 00:00 UK time, Wednesday, 25 May 2005

Over the past few weeks here on Ouch, we've been asking you to nominate your Greatest Disabled TV Character (the nomination stage comes to an end this Friday 27 May, with the top ten being put to the vote soon after). Of course, one of the things about asking you to choose a character rather than an actual performer is that the actors behind the roles will end up being a mix of disabled and non-disabled people. It's going to be interesting to see how that balance pans out when we unveil the ten most popular characters.

In the meantime, though, the situation for disabled actors looks less than promising if the from Scope - as part of their campaign against disablism - are anything to go by. In answer to the question: "Do you think it is unacceptable for a non-disabled person to play the part of a disabled person in a drama or film?", an astonishing 78 per cent of respondents thought that, yes, it was acceptable, while only a third of respondents thought there were too few disabled people currently on TV.

Crippled Monkey wonders: so if the majority of the general public think there are quite enough disabled people on the telly, where on Earth are they seeing all the crips that are supposedly filling our screens? Is there some secret TV channel I don't know about, which shows programmes featuring wall-to-wall disabled people 24 hours a day, 7 days a week? Maybe someone's launched Ouch TV on the quiet, without giving me my own show? I think we should be told.

Radio 1 DJ named in deaf film drama

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Crippled Monkey | 00:00 UK time, Wednesday, 25 May 2005

British film is about superstar club DJ Frankie Wilde (Paul Kaye), who increasingly loses his mind as he becomes deaf - thanks to a long standing hearing disorder.

Empire Magazine it as "part satire of the drug-fuelled clubbing scene, part harrowing disability drama".

Named after a Radio One DJ - whose celebrity surname conveniently rhymes with 'wrong' in a way no other word does - the film is set on party island Ibiza and is largely improvised. We see Wild gradually not being able to mix, cut 'n' scratch while on stage, and he loses the ability to do studio work too. Directed by Michael Dowse, it is a follow-up to rock spoof FUBAR and also stars Mike Wilmot and Beatriz Batarda.

It is said to be rather dark, carries a 15 certificate and gets its cinema release this Friday 27 May. If you go and see it, tell us what you think.

Éù Related link: official movie website.

New Ouch Top Ten

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Crippled Monkey | 00:00 UK time, Tuesday, 24 May 2005

Yesterday's entry about Five's programme The Boy With The Incredible Brain gave us here at Ouch an idea. A dastardly and probably unforgiveable idea. Be sure to click this link to read the new Ouch Top Ten in our Play section: Ten documentaries on Five this autumn.

'Blind' restaurant comes to London

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Crippled Monkey | 00:00 UK time, Tuesday, 24 May 2005

Paris has got one, as have Zurich and Berlin. Now London is to get a taste of the 'blind eating' experience with the summer opening of the latest branch of Dans le Noir (which, my GCSE French tells me, means something like "in the dark". Clever, huh?)

So, yeah, what happens is this: the restaurant is completely dark. Pitch black, in fact. Because all those sighted patrons won't know Braille, you get to choose your meal from the menu whilst mooching around in the bar beforehand, but once you enter the blacked-out restaurant you get guided to your seat by the blind staff, who also serve the meals. Any move you make while in the restaurant has to be done with the help of your guide - even getting directed to the Gents or Ladies.

Oh, and wine is apparently served in unbreakable glasses, in order to protect against spillages. Bless!

Speaking in , Edouard de Broglie, the man behind the idea, says that it's all about improving the culinary experience: "The preconception of what food tastes like because of how it looks is gone. All your other senses are abruptly awoken and you taste the food like you have never tasted it before. It makes you rethink everything. You become blind and the blind waiters become your guide". Wow, profound stuff. And completely true, of course. My friend who's blind says his Pot Noodles taste a hundred per cent better 'cos he can't see 'em. Really.

There's only one thing I'm wondering about. Will blind diners get a hefty discount on their bill? I think we at Ouch should test this out by getting a coach party together for a night out in Clerkenwell when the new restaurant opens in the summer. Who's in?

US anti-depressant implant pending approval

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Crippled Monkey | 00:00 UK time, Tuesday, 24 May 2005

Interesting yet a tad scary this in a 50s sci fi movie way. According to the International Herald Tribune website, the US Food and Drug Administration an electronic implant that treats severe depression in those for whom other treatments have failed.

It has caused some controversy, however, with many experts not sure why it has come this far down the road to approval with so little scientific evidence that it works.

The device is similar to a pacemaker. It is fitted in the chest and sends electric pulses through wires to a point in the neck known as the Vagus nerve. This nerve has wide connections through the brain and is said to be involved in reflexes and other auto responses.

Electronics instead of chemical drugs could, however, be a fantastic thing!

Monkey is reminded of a little walkman like device called an Alpha Stim that I had the pleasure of testing about 5 years ago. No surgery involved: you attached clips to each earlobe and it delivered a small electrical current - apparently across the brain - and was said to reduce depression and anxiety, amongst other claims.

And when it comes to surgery, how about a bit of , an alternative to the usual knocking out chemical injections or gas?

Crippled Monkey looks forward to becoming a cyborg in the not too distant future and, yes, would be happy to accept '7 of 9' for his bride.

Dinklage meets Lassie

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Crippled Monkey | 00:00 UK time, Monday, 23 May 2005

We saw him in Elf and in The Station Agent; he also played on Broadway. Well, now he's gone canine.

Peter Dinklage starts the remake of Lassie Come Home today. It is a seven week shoot in Ireland and the Isle of Man. Dinklage plays Rowlie alongside co-stars Peter O'Toole and Samantha Morton. It is directed by Charles Sturridge (Longitude, Shackleton).

Also starring League of Gentleman's Steve Pemberton and Jemma Redgrave.

Monkey thinks it's fantastic to see an actor of restricted growth outside of Hogwarts and Middle Earth and is watching the rise of this man's career keenly. Go Peter! Oh, and there's a good interview with him here on the ´óÏó´«Ã½ Films site too.

The Boy With The Incredible Brain

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Crippled Monkey | 00:00 UK time, Monday, 23 May 2005

Crippled Monkey has noticed that there is another one of those "The Boy With" disability programmes on TV tonight. Step forward The Boy With The Incredible Brain.

It's a documentary about 26 year-old Daniel Tammet, who they're billing as a "British Rain Man". He learnt how to speak Icelandic in 15 hours, can recite pi to 22514 places, and can tell you the day of the week on any given date in the last 100 years.

One of few known savants in the world, Daniel is different because he can explain how he does it, unlike the Raymond Babbitt character played by Dustin Hoffman. Scientists believe he could unlock the door to autism and to memory recall in everyone.

More about our man: Daniel traces back his extraordinary mental ability to a set of seizures he had as a child. He runs an online learning company called Optimnem. He appeared on the David Letterman show recently. He lives with his partner Neil, a computer programmer who he met online, in a quiet part of Kent. And he did rather a good with The Guardian back in February that is really worth a read.

The documentary sees Daniel undergo many scientific tests. He also plays his first game of blackjack in a Las Vegas casino and meets Kim Peek - the real-life inspiration for the film Rain Man - who demonstrates his incredible photographic memory.

Tune in to Five tonight at 9.00pm. Followed swiftly by a repeat of The Woman With The 14-Stone Tumour.

Star Wars and disability

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Crippled Monkey | 00:00 UK time, Friday, 20 May 2005

goes nationwide this weekend, and it would have been nice if we had a Jedi disability article or something. Sadly we didn't manage it, despite much wracking of brains. At Ouch we often find ourselves desperately trying to come up with a disability angle on current news stories. I have to hold my hands up and say that on occasions we've gone a bit too far, finding highly tenuous disability links on occasions. Though we got loads of positive feedback about it, some emailed us and told us that our recent Doctor Who article, for instance, went too far, seeing disability stuff that perhaps just wasn't really there. Naw. So, I am alerting you to the following web page with a certain amount of sympathy, you understand.

I really couldn't help laughing a little when I read this article from Kathie Snow. Entitled , it really ekes out every tiny weenie link to disability, wringing the subject matter thoroughly dry. Take this passage for example:

"If Spiderman could be compared to a person with 'acquired differences', some Star Wars characters could be thought of as being 'born' with differences. Many don't look 'human' - like the blue creature who gets around by flapping the short wings on his back - but they're still contributing, participating members of the community-at-large."

Now don't get me wrong, I think it is genius and this way of thinking really opens the door wide open to Ouch. Kathie should come and work for us. We've already had two meetings this morning about becoming an all out Pokemon website, occasionally including features about Loony Toons characters. No one can say that Daffy Duck and Bugs Bunny are normal, can they? And, folks, in a lot of ways all cartoon and film characters have their own disabilities, don't they? Ouch Toon launches Monday. It doesn't though.

Enjoy all those crippled aliens if you go and see Star Wars this week, won't ya.

Glasto tickets still available!

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Vaughan | 00:00 UK time, Friday, 20 May 2005

A couple of weeks back, we mentioned that 250 tickets for the last day (Sunday 26 June) of this summer's Glastonbury Festival had been made available to disabled people. Now, we all know that Glasto tickets have a tendency to sell like hot cakes, so you'd think they would have been snapped up long ago, wouldn't you? Wrong! About three-quarters of them are still available. So what are you waiting for?

There's more about how to get hold of the tickets in this on the Glastonbury website. And if you want the official line on disabled access to the Glastonbury site, check out the festival's .

Access to the ´óÏó´«Ã½ Proms

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Vaughan | 00:00 UK time, Friday, 20 May 2005

The festival of classical music that is the ´óÏó´«Ã½ Proms is on the horizon once again. This year it runs from 15 July to 10 September, with over 70 concerts taking place at London's Royal Albert Hall. Themes for the season include the sea, fairy tales, and composer anniversaries.



´óÏó´«Ã½ Proms logo

So this is a good time to remind you of all the various access facilities that are laid on for the Proms. These include: wheelchair access to every Prom and Chamber Prom, guide dog facilities and an infra-red hearing system. The Proms guide is also available in audio cassette, CD, braille and computer disk versions. But the best thing is that there's a 50% discount on most tickets for disabled concert-goers - quite a bargain.

For more, check out the Proms website. There are details on ticket booking for disabled Promenaders, plus lots of information on disabled access to the various venues.

Welcome to our new blog

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Crippled Monkey | 00:00 UK time, Friday, 20 May 2005

And finally our new wizzy weblog is live. We've been giving hints about it in our weekly newsletter for a little while now but now it's here. What do you mean you don't subscribe to our newsletter?

So now, as well as reading all the entries in our blog, you can also comment on them. Click on the bit that says 'comments' and has a number beside it, and you'll get through to the page where you can leave a message about this individual entry. It also gives you the chance to shout about your own weblog or site, within reason; see our weblog frequently asked questions page.

We've been testing out the new weblog system for months. We think it's working well and is nice and simple to use. If, however, you discover any difficulties with the new service then send us an email.

We hope you like it and will also continue to send us ideas for what we should include as entries to the same email address above. Oh, and you'll notice everything is posted in categories too now, which will help you find what you're interested in.

Has anybody seen our Minister? (Part III)

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Crippled Monkey | 00:00 UK time, Thursday, 12 May 2005

Your intrepid political correspondent Crippled Monkey here, continuing to sniff out the ongoing saga surrounding the appointment of the new Minister for Disabled People.

So what do we know? Well, Anne McGuire MP has definitely got the job, because the Department for Work and Pensions says as much in its issued on Tuesday. Why then, for a time, did we and everybody else think that Liz Blackman MP was the lucky person who had been appointed?

Sadly, the role of Minister for Disabled People isn't quite high profile enough to gain much coverage in the media, but the Glasgow-based newspaper The Herald today reports that , stating that "the surprise shake-up came after Liz Blackman, a junior minister at the Department of Work and Pensions, declined to take up the post". A paragraph at the end of another report in adds: "Liz Blackman was initially offered that job and Downing Street had announced her appointment on Monday night. But she later turned it down". Hence the confusion.

As this was a political appointment rather than a Department for Work and Pensions matter, I called the Downing Street press office to enquire about the reason for Liz Blackman declining the disability job. Was I about to uncover a juicy bit of scandalous Westminster gossip? Er, no. Apparently, Ms Blackman "decided to concentrate on her constituency work".

Did Basil Fawlty have Asperger's?

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Crippled Monkey | 00:00 UK time, Wednesday, 11 May 2005

And what about Mork in Mork and Mindy? Did Mr Bean display signs of autism? Or Taz from Taz-Mania? Lisa Simpson and Moe of Moe's Tavern in The Simpsons? Even Dilbert of, er, Dilbert fame?

These are just some of the famous people and characters from TV, films and even cartoons who are listed on the page. Fascinating stuff, even if I don't believe half of it, particularly when the page announces that the people featured on the list are there because: "some may have autism or AS, in their mild or severe forms. Others may be elsewhere on the autistic continuum. And others listed may just be unusual individuals".

Unusual individuals? Well, that narrows it down, doesn't it? Although I'm not sure that it's what you'd called a politically correct term.

Here at Ouch, we kinda love lists like this, mostly because they tend to bring up the unlikeliest of names. Up until now, our favourite has been the collection of from reddisability.org.uk, where you can find out which stars of heavy metal rock music have asthma (yes, really). But if you've found any more of these line-ups of the great and good of the disability world on the net - the sillier the better, of course - do let me know about them by sending the URLs to the usual address.

Has anybody seen our Minister? (Part II)

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Crippled Monkey | 00:00 UK time, Wednesday, 11 May 2005

Right, listen up everyone. Crippled Monkey wants you to forget everything I told you yesterday. It seems that the rumour about the new Minister for Disabled People being Liz Blackman was just that - a rumour. Those damn Westminster leaks. But now the true identity of the new person in the job can be revealed (cue dramatic drum-roll), and it's Anne McGuire MP!



Anne McGuire MP: yes, she really is our new minister

I sense you don't believe me after the previous revelation turned out to be a red herring. But look, it's true! I got it from ! (OK, it's just a Department of Work and Pensions press release. And no, I'm not suggesting for a moment that the good folks at the DWP are horses.) It even features a footnote mentioning that our old friend Liz Blackman won't be taking up a ministerial post. Glad we've got all that sorted out, then.

So what can I tell you about Anne? Well, she's MP for Stirling in Scotland, and has been in parliament since 1997. This is her , but she's also one of those MPs with her own , which includes further . Oh, and you can also read a (note: this is a Word document) she issued in December last year, welcoming the publication of a new Disability Discrimination Bill.

Right, I'm going to have a bit of a lie-down, as it's been a confusing couple of days. This is Crippled Monkey for ´óÏó´«Ã½ Ouch, standing outside the House of Commons, doing a very bad impression of Andrew Marr.

Has anybody seen our Minister?

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Crippled Monkey | 00:00 UK time, Tuesday, 10 May 2005

In these busy days of post-election reshuffles, the big names and the senior posts tend to dominate the news headlines (yes, Blunkett's back!), which means it's all too easy to lose track of who's moved where lower down the government ranks. So Crippled Monkey thinks we have a new Minister for Disabled People, but I'm still not entirely sure.



Liz Blackman MP: possibly our new Minister (maybe)

Word is spreading - not least on Ouch's messageboard - that the lucky winner of this post is Liz Blackman MP. Now, I've consulted my usual sources and dug up , which reveals that Liz is the member for Erewash in the East Midlands. This means, fact fans, that she was the winning MP in the constituency where Robert Kilroy-Silk's ambitions for his Veritas party came to .

But apart from that, what else do we know about Ms Blackman? Well, she's the chair of - the All Party Parliamentary Group on Autism - as well as serving as a member on the All Party Parliamentary Groups on Disability, Fibromyalgia and Learning Disability, Not sure yet as to what her direct knowledge or experience of disability might be. We'll wait and see, I guess.

Of course, having said all that, there still doesn't seem to be any direct statement that Liz Blackman really is the new Minister for Disabled People. The Department for Work and Pensions' so far lists her as one of two "Parliamentary Under Secretaries (Commons)". But since it's been confirmed that the previous disability minister, Maria Eagle, has to the Department for Education and Skills, I'm presuming that someone must have taken over the job. Oh, aren't the goings-on at Westminster just so confusing?!

This is Crippled Monkey reporting from outside Parliament, for ´óÏó´«Ã½ Ouch. More news as I discover it. Maybe.

I just audio-described to say I love you

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Crippled Monkey | 00:00 UK time, Monday, 9 May 2005

Visually impaired music fans need wonder no longer about what's going in music videos - well, one music video at least, but it's a start - as Stevie Wonder's new single, So What The Fuss, is going to be accompanied by an audio-described track. Two versions of the video will be released to broadcasters: the normal one, and the second audio-described version.



Stevie Wonder: now available in audio description

But perhaps the best bit, as the story on reveals, is just who is going to be voicing the audio description. Not just any old TV announcer, oh no. It's going to be done by hip-hop star Busta Rhymes. He's apparently very big with da kidz, you know, but there's no confirmation yet about whether he'll be rapping the descriptions or just speaking them in his normal voice.

Oh, and while we're on the subject of Stevie Wonder - a hugely successful artist and songwriter, with years of hits behind him - how is it that journalists can still only think to use hackneyed old sight-related puns when it comes to writing stories about him? Yes, we know he can't see very much, thank you. I'm not referring to any publication in particular, of course. Oh no. And definitely not The Independent with their headline. Groan.

Attention all bookworms

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Vaughan | 00:00 UK time, Friday, 6 May 2005

Although I hate to drag people away from Ouch's own superb messageboards, if you're visually impaired and an avid bookworm, you may like to know that the new discussion forums are now online on the website. There are forums on access technology, public libraries and tactile formats, as well as a general Web Booktalk area where book lovers can discuss everything and anything to do with books and reading.

Crimewave retaliation

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Crippled Monkey | 00:00 UK time, Friday, 6 May 2005

A priceless little story tucked away in a corner of yesterday's edition of The Times. Two Ipswich students in wheelchairs were the victims of an attempted mugging. The only thing is ... they weren't actually disabled, but were rehearsing a dance routine "to highlight the vulnerability of disabled people" (The Times's words, not mine). When the mugger tried to grab the video camera they were using, the two female students leapt from their wheelchairs and gave chase. The criminal was quite surprised (to put it mildly) and immediately fled the scene.

That Andy from Little Britain thing is getting everywhere, isn't it?

Richard Gere meets his (disabled) public

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Crippled Monkey | 00:00 UK time, Wednesday, 4 May 2005

I know we brought you a story from contactmusic.com only yesterday, but they're back with another cracking celebrity/disability crossover story: . Boo! Hiss!



Richard Gere

It seems that the star of Pretty Woman and An Officer and a Gentleman was attending a charity dinner in Washington DC last weekend, when he was approached by a couple of teenage wheelchair users who wanted to have their photo taken with the Hollywood actor, but he refused their request. (You can say "Boo! Hiss!" again now, if you like).

So far so unremarkable. You're probably thinking along the same lines as Crippled Monkey: "Yeah, but why should Richard Gere immediately consent to getting his picture taken with a couple of teenagers just because they're - shock horror - wheelchair users?"

Unfortunately, the ever-so-smooth Mr Gere then had to take it a bit too far, didn't he? When told how upset the star-spotting teens were, he apparently replied: "I'm hard of hearing and I have a bad hip. We all have problems".

That's it, then. You heard it here first (well, second). Richard Gere is officially disabled! Sort of. Admittedly he'd kept it rather quiet up 'til now, but now that he's announced it to the world, Ouch says: welcome to the club, Richard! Ahem.

Snow, swingometers and sign language

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Crippled Monkey | 00:00 UK time, Wednesday, 4 May 2005

If you're a BSL user who has turned 18 years old since the last general election and tomorrow is going to be your first time entering the polling station, you may want to check out the step-by-step guide on how to place your vote - complete with BSL interpretation - presented by king of the swingometer, Peter Snow. It's available on the ´óÏó´«Ã½ News website (look for it under 'The Basics in Video' menu).

Nick Nolte acts blind

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Crippled Monkey | 00:00 UK time, Tuesday, 3 May 2005

An amazing, caring, heart-warming story from Hollywood this afternoon. New movie The Beautiful Country features a blind Vietnam veteran, played by (sighted) actor Nick Nolte. You'll be pleased to hear though that he didn't just turn up on set and stylishly bump into things with his arms outstretched, whilst staring wildly and blankly ahead. Oh no. Just read from contactmusic.com.

This outstanding piece of journalism really helps us to appreciate that Nick Nolte is one hell of a regular guy. The star of Cape Fear, Lorenzo's Oil and Hotel Rwanda apparently "spent weeks studying the sightless" for this part. And thanks to an American blind association he actually got some blind training - a kind of reverse rehabilitation if you like. Dehabilitation?

Many have observed that blind people must have a Zen-like existence because of the lack of complexity in their lives due to less visual information going into their brains. The article claims Nolte found that the hours on set gave him "an odd sense of peace". He added: "If you keep yourself blinded for eight hours you find a peace that you never imagined".

Beautifully, it seems the superstar decided that training alone wasn't enough and, when it came to the actual filming, needed to really blind himself with the help of two specially made contact lenses, "one that covered the iris, which was solid black, and a milk-white contact lens over the rest of the eye".

When the movie world goes to these lengths to re-create disability accurately, you realise there's really no need for disabled people. Good on ya Nolte, you unusually sensitive method man. Tomorrow I will be spending the day pretending to act.

Glastonbury disabled tickets

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Crippled Monkey | 00:00 UK time, Tuesday, 3 May 2005

Further to last Wednesday's post about a number of Glastonbury Festival tickets being set aside for disabled mud 'n' music lovers to attend the final day of the event on Sunday 26 June, Ouch's very own Flash Wilson - a dedicated Glasto reveller - has been in touch to let us know that more details are now available on the official Glastonbury Festival .

It's on a strictly first come, first served basis, and it's likely that these things will go like hot cakes, so get applying. And don't forget - Kylie is the headline act on the Sunday!

Blogwatch

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Crippled Monkey | 00:00 UK time, Tuesday, 3 May 2005

"Crippled Monkey!" I hear you shout. "What's happening in the wonderful world of crip blogs?!"

Well, please keep your voice down, as I'm only just recovering from the excesses of the long Bank Holidayweekend.

One of Ouch's blogs we like, the very artistic , got in touch to let me know that the American disability magazine has just posted a new feature entitled , which lists a number of blogs by disabled people - and also mentions us here at Ouch. Nice to know we've been spotted. So why not spend the day investigating the ever-growing disability blogosphere?

And while we're doing the blog round-up thing, Christopher Phillips emailed us to let us know about his blog called , which covers the interesting combination of religion, spirituality and disability.

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