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Can't

Comments

1. At 12:38 PM on 22 Sep 2006, big sister wrote:

   What the heck is Eddie on about?
   (And what was that message about abusive emails?)

2. At 01:11 PM on 22 Sep 2006, wrote:

   That's the sound I make in the bath sometimes.

3. At 01:30 PM on 22 Sep 2006, Rachel wrote:

   Ed, Eddie, Edward, Ted....

   You're just not taking this blog stuff seriously, are you?

   We want some emotional outpourings from you.

   Can't you wax lyrical about how Enid in ´óÏó´«Ã½ accounts gave you a knowing look and how that made you blush and run away before anyone saw?

   Or, how about your feelings of turmoil, victimisation and anger when Terry Wogan, for the 4th time this week, beat you to the last portion of jam roly-poly in the canteen yet again...

   Go on, you know you want to ;o)

4. At 02:58 PM on 22 Sep 2006, valery pedant wrote:

   hey andyc! wotcha?

   bobloblaw eh? if you listened to Y & Yrs today you will have heard John W (presumably not ours...or?) talking about the origins of lobscouse and lobby (item on regional food if you need to know).

   Gotta have lobster for tea tonight....

5. At 03:50 PM on 22 Sep 2006, Dr Hackenbush wrote:

   To change the subject, I think the case was a bit overstated on Feedback earlier. For me anyway, it isn’t that I had no interest in the TB vs GB story being reported, but that I could have done with rather a lot less on that - the facts, perhaps - and rather more on genuine news stories. OK? Good.

6. At 03:57 PM on 22 Sep 2006, valery pedant wrote:

   btw andy (prev blog) what do you think the moderator didn't like about ta-da?

   Only joking about the lobster, though the claws might come in useful for FF to anchor his twizzling duvet with? Or perhaps the judicious use of some broken telescopic umbrellasmight solve the problem?

   You don't mind if I draw a few blogs together do you? Here's another reminder to Ap to let us know if/when she's getting that min-break too.

   SB5 Back to my stones

7. At 05:30 PM on 22 Sep 2006, wrote:

   Ta Da!

8. At 06:16 PM on 22 Sep 2006, wrote:

   Ta Da!

9. At 07:41 PM on 22 Sep 2006, valery pedant wrote:

   Well done that manat 7 & 8!

   Also, of course I meant mini-break, Aperry, not minbreak. Can't think of anything even vaguely funny to say about that. Suggestions welcome...

   SB8 Feeling sorry for this Blog, does nobody love it?

10. At 07:51 PM on 22 Sep 2006, Fearless Fred wrote:

    Valery (6) Those ideas bring tears to the eyes... I'm a little apprehensive to go near the duvet now, in case I wake up and find myself with bits of lobster claw and broken umbrella pinning me under the duvet for the rest of the weekend!

11. At 09:08 PM on 22 Sep 2006, Aperitif wrote:

    Andycragg! Where've you been?! Have you finished the blog illustations yet? (And how much use will that really be if we don't have the scribes in place yet?). Welcome back anyway!

    I don't know what "ta-da" is all about (I think some of the earlier blog may be missing as I've just read it and you weren't there at all), but can I response with a round of applause just in case?

    Valery, I expect to away from Monday night until Wednesday afternoon, which sounds good, but I actually wanted to be away from tomorrow until next Friday. Too much work - boo hoo. I'll send a card if all goes to plan. Between now and Monday night I will be working very hard - all bl**dy weekend. Sympathy? Or will you be whacking and therefore too tired to give a damn? (What is it that's needing all of this whacking anyway? How big is your path/terrace/driveway/whatever it is?)

    Fearless, in view of your concerns about lobsters/umberellas, why not try sleeping on the sofa tonight? Or staying up all night partying thus having no need for apprehension? (Isn't that akin to fear? Could you be contravening trades descripitions or whatever it's called now?)

    I have decided to name my duvet "Fred", btw ;)

12. At 09:06 AM on 23 Sep 2006, Fearless Fred wrote:

    Morning, Appy!

    No, apprehension isn't the same as fear... It denotes the hope that I don't have to struggle too much to get out of bed to get that vital first cup of coffee...

    I'm honoured that you would name your duvet Fred :o) To have an inaminate object named after me :p

13. At 09:44 AM on 23 Sep 2006, wrote:

    Hello Teef (Perry?), illustrations could be the way forward, a cartoon slyle history of everything in the world ever.

    And - pictures reduce the amount of paper by about a thousand times :)

14. At 11:25 AM on 23 Sep 2006, valery pedant wrote:

    Hey FF - hope I didn't give you nightmares? It did occur to me though - If you woke up with the washing instructions label in your mouth, then either the duvet cover was on inside out, or you didn't have a cover on the duvet in the first place. Must we be told?

    Good luck with the hard work, Ap. If I could post pictures (though I prefer words anyway) I'd show you what we are doing, but suffice to say, it's a wooden building which is going to solve all our storage problems (yeh, right! we already have a double garage, but that's full). That is, it isn't yet a wooden building, we're working on the foundations at the moment....hence the stones and the whacking. Took machine back this morning though :o), all 40 tons having been spread and whacked. Tired now, maybe a BBQ this afternoon to celebrate, we have summer again today!

15. At 11:57 AM on 23 Sep 2006, Fearless Fred wrote:

    No nightmares, thanks, V! Actually, it was the tag from the duvet itself. You see, the cover has a couple of poppers that don't work, and they were at the end where the tag was, and the duvet rotated... You know, it really isn't that interesting a story! I don't think the rest of the blog want to know about my nocturnal habits!

    I wish you were able to post a video of the whacking in progress, though. It sounds like fun!

16. At 01:08 PM on 23 Sep 2006, Aperitif wrote:

    Afternoon all. Little lie in this morning but back to it now. :(

    Happy barbecuing Valery - what're you having?

    I shall be having "sandwich at my desk" food today. Grr!

    Fearless, what makes you think my duvet is inanimate???

17. At 01:29 PM on 23 Sep 2006, Aperitif wrote:

    ??????

18. At 01:47 PM on 23 Sep 2006, valery pedant wrote:

    So does yours rotate too Ap? Or is it even more interesting? In what other way is it animate? Still haven't given mine a good name, but this morning Pluto skittered in and hurled himself on to it after he'd been out for his early morning salute to the sun. Bloody great dirty pawprints now enhancing the pattern...

    Fearless - note to self - I must sew my poppers on immediately otherwise The Concerned will be posting lobster claws through my cyberletterbox

    SB18.

19. At 02:53 PM on 23 Sep 2006, Fearless Fred wrote:

    You can relax, Valery, I've changed the duvet cover to one that has all poppers functioning:) I'd rather not have lobster claws arriving in the post!!

20. At 04:00 PM on 23 Sep 2006, valery pedant wrote:

    FF - Excellent! I feel like I have two sons to look after now.....

    T'other Blog, Weather, is there summat wrong with it? I'm sure I posted on it at the same time as this one, but there's nothing there. Mind you, I can't remember what I said, so perhaps it mattereth not if it turneth up.

21. At 04:45 PM on 23 Sep 2006, David McNickle wrote:

    Big Sister (1sh),
    I got one of those 'abusive e-mail' messages as well, and then they put my post on the blog.

22. At 05:45 PM on 23 Sep 2006, Fearless Fred wrote:

    Hey, Valery,... Trust me, I'm old enough and ugly enough to look after myelf nowadays:o)

    As for Weather, I have a feeling that it's just one of those mysteries of the PM blog. You'll turn your back on it and suddenly another 20 or so posts will arrive, all at once. I think poor Lissa's given up trying to sort out the system, and I don't blame her...

23. At 05:59 PM on 23 Sep 2006, Dr Hackenbush wrote:

    SB23

    FF - Perhaps you know better, but I’d have thought that how ugly you are (one is) would have no bearing on your (one’s) ability to look after yourself (one, etc.)...

    P.S. I do know that the FF are, of course, the Fantastic Four.

24. At 08:05 PM on 23 Sep 2006, Fearless Fred wrote:

    Dear Dr H, I thought the Fantastic Four were the F4?

    By the way, the only thing I can think when I see your name is: "This morning, I shot an elephant in my pyjamas..."

25. At 09:05 PM on 23 Sep 2006, Chris the Pickle wrote:

    FF - why would an elephant be in your pyjamas?

    Or, how did you get the elephant into your gun?

    I do crack myself up sometimes...

    ;o)

26. At 09:23 PM on 23 Sep 2006, Fearless Fred wrote:

    SB26

    Oh CtP, you've almost got the quote right! According to my memory (and the wonderful www.imdb.com), the exact phrase is "One morning I shot an elephant in my pajamas. How he got in my pajamas, I don't know" :) Trust me, there's a Marx Brothers quote for almost any circumstance...

27. At 11:56 PM on 23 Sep 2006, Aperitif wrote:

    Hey Fearless (22), What's your elf called?

    Valery (18), no, actually, it doesn't rotate, and I have never tried to eat it. But I don't want you to think of it as dull - it's my favourite sleeping companion after all.

28. At 12:00 AM on 24 Sep 2006, Dr Hackenbush wrote:

    SB27

    There certainly is.

    Signor Ravelli’s first selection will be, Somewhere My Love Lies Sleeping - with a male chorus.

    And it was (or is) FF, not F4.

29. At 12:59 AM on 24 Sep 2006, Aperitif wrote:

    What is the appropriate Marx bros quote for posts not showing up for no good reason then?

30. At 01:34 AM on 24 Sep 2006, Artie Thurdstroak wrote:

    sb 28

    Am I the only one to be horrified by the time shown on post 27?

    It's bad enough that (on a blog for a programme named PM, by a broadcasting organisation that makes a feature of the time signal and the striking of Big Ben) the time shown for postings is an awful mixture of the 12 hour clock and the 24 hour clock leading to the very strange "01.25 PM" etc..
    Now, it appears that the Good Doctor is condoning the nonsensical "12.00 AM". There is no such time, nor is there a "12.00 PM".
    For centuries people have known there is a "12 midnight" and a "12 noon" (or mid-day). Why, suddenly, has this knowledge disappeared? And how? Is it reasonable to blame M*cro$oft as I do for all other ills?
    (Other software producers are available for opprobrium.)

31. At 01:51 AM on 24 Sep 2006, Wally Winker wrote:

    sb31
    Aperitif @ 29

    How about:

    "I think you’ve got something there, but I’ll wait outside until you clean it up."
    Groucho

32. At 08:58 AM on 24 Sep 2006, Fearless Fred wrote:

    sb32

    re 31 Good call WW! I'd like to add another quote regarding the quality of some of my posts here:

    "Gentlemen, Chicolini here may talk like an idiot, and look like an idiot, but don't let that fool you: he really is an idiot."

33. At 01:20 PM on 24 Sep 2006, Aperitif wrote:

    Nice ones guys.

    Artie (30) I agree with the sentiment but the time on post 27 was 11.56. Btw, do you change your name every time you post? Or are there several chameleons out there?

    Talking of "chameleons" I feel the urge to share that I spent most of the summer of 1983 singing "I'm a, I'm a, I'm a, I'm a, I'm a comedian, you come and go, you come and go-o-o-o". Well, I was very young. At least I'd added two new words to my vocabulary by the autumn.
    

34. At 05:55 PM on 24 Sep 2006, Artie Thurdstroak wrote:

    sb34

    Aperitif @33
    At the time I composed my offering Dr. Ackerbilk was wearing the number 27 shirt as he clearly intended. Witness his sb27.
    It showed that he took the field at "12.00 AM" which I thought he would never have done.
    As you are a delightful young lady, you cannot imagine the problems of old age, e.g. remembering one's name and ... erm ... so I cannot say whether there is anyone else who ...
    I'm sure I've got some sweeties for you ... somewhere ...
    

35. At 06:13 PM on 24 Sep 2006, Wally Winker wrote:

    sb34

    FF @32

    Thankyou for including me in both sentences of your post.
    But I'm still not happy about contributing to a blog which accepts posts from people like me.
    (Thank you Groucho.)
    

36. At 08:03 PM on 24 Sep 2006, Alison Dry wrote:

    as for all this HTML malarkey...

    "A child of five would understand this. Send someone to fetch a child of five."

    eeeeeii thenk yooooo

37. At 10:09 PM on 24 Sep 2006, Aperitif wrote:

    Artie, OK, I guess you're not going to tell me which ones are you - but a clue as to how many guises maybe?

    P.S. I'm not so delightful that I won't accept those sweeties then run away.

38. At 10:22 PM on 24 Sep 2006, Dr Hackenbush wrote:

    SB37

    Good work, guys.

    Artie (30, 34) - There is a digital readout on my cooker which goes to 24:00 at midnight, then 0:01. How do you respond to that, and is it preferable to my alarm clock, which shows 0:00 after 23:59?

    Ravelli, take a letter...

39. At 10:43 PM on 24 Sep 2006, Aperitif wrote:

    Dr H. (38) IMHO your alarm clock is preferable to you cooker. But only just.

40. At 10:53 PM on 24 Sep 2006, Dr Hackenbush wrote:

    Good to know, A.

    Now, did you pick out the words to Two Tribes in 1984?

    SB40

41. At 12:26 AM on 25 Sep 2006, Artie Thurdstroak wrote:

    sb 41

    Signor Ravelli,
    I acknowledge receipt of your enquiry and assure that your letter is valued and important to me.
    Whilst normally eager to share my opinions with all but the fleetest of foot, I have to say that, unfortunately, in this one respect I am unable to assist you, definitively, as the niceties of the modern 24 hour time-keeping system are a mystery to me. Still and all, I have to confess a sneaking admiration for the reactionary feel of two dozen hours. My vote goes to the cooker.

    Please present my compliments to the Good Doctor and tell him I'm ready for a repeat prescription.
    ps
    The cheque is in the post.

42. At 10:59 AM on 25 Sep 2006, Aperitif wrote:

    Doc (40), yes, I believe so.

    I do remember that "Relax" wasn't played on Radio 1 (not banned, but "DJ" Mike Read led a rebellion) so I hadn't really heard it much when it was featured on "Spitting Image" - sung by Mark Thatcher, lost in the desert: "Relax, don't do it, when you want a car..."

    I really couldn't understand what all of the fuss was about. Still don't actually...

43. At 11:46 AM on 25 Sep 2006, Dr Hackenbush wrote:

    SB43

    Perhaps it’s best that way.

44. At 08:34 PM on 27 Sep 2006, whisht wrote:

    am i the only one with "Caa-an't getchooo ouutta myye head..."? rattling around their ears?

    although my eyes are also remembering this song....

    [sigh]