Pure, dead brilliant?
Hey, what鈥檚 so bad about trying to be the best wee country in the world? I rather liked being greeted by the slogan when I arrived back at a Scottish airport.
I mean, there you are: breakfast in Paris, lunch in Glasgow, luggage in Geneva. Just the thing to cheer you up, to be confronted by a poster of a pipe band or something hideously high-tech, emblazoned with the words: 鈥淲elcome to the best small country in the world.鈥
And now the SNP Executive has decided to dump it. For shame! OK, maybe it was a bit kitsch.
A bit internally self-contradictory. (We鈥檙e the best 鈥 but only in a field that we鈥檝e defined ourselves: don鈥檛 expect us to be seriously good like one of those big, nasty countries.)
But you鈥檒l notice the absence of an alternative so far. What are we going to say now? 鈥淪imply the best鈥. Or will the nation as a whole ape Prestwick Airport and go for 鈥減ure, dead brilliant?鈥
Just think how that translates internationally, if you don鈥檛 grasp the patois: a marketing slogan with the word 鈥渄ead鈥 in it. (Love the airport, by the way, loathe the slogan.)
Or maybe: 鈥淲elcome to Scotland 鈥 want to make something of it?鈥 I await ideas.
PS: More on the 鈥100 days.鈥 Congrats to those of you who spotted that Labour鈥檚 sums didn鈥檛 add up. They鈥檇 said that the SNP made 67 promises: with 20 delivered in full, ten in part and 38 not at all. Total 68: as you rightly pointed out and I failed to notice, owing to endemic lassitude. Nice one.
Further, I have since learned more about the origins of the 100 days business. I had thought it started with JFK. But no: it was FDR. Roosevelt entered the Oval Office in 1933, determined to sort out, with urgency, the cataclysm that was the US economy.
I am indebted for this information to my highly esteemed 大象传媒 colleague Alan Little whom I met in the yurt at the Edinburgh Book Festival.
FDR, of course, introduced the New Deal and abolished prohibition. Bit of a way to go then, First Minister.
I'm 
Comments
Glad you corrected the history lesson to FDR there. First really modern politician who effectively moulded the Democratic alliance that was to re-form in every subsequent successful presidential election to Clinton.
"Best wee country in the world" is offensive to people of my political persuasion as: A) it is the very same people who spend all their time during elections saying "Scotland's too wee", "too poor", "Scots are too stupid" or in other forms - "We're not good enough" that sponsored the slogan. Wee-ness in itself is one of their main - if completely outdated - arguments. B) It perpetuates the image of Scotland as an insignificant place with no role to play in the world - both to outsiders and to the country's own population. Merely a curious province to visit - rather like a desire to go to Newfoundland, Siberia or Alaska.
Perhaps, a slogan like "Scotland welcomes you" or "Scotland - home of John Smeaton"; at least something politically neutral should be used!!!
Perhaps the "Haste ye back" signs seen throughout Ayrshire should be used in the departure lounges of airports and in ferry terminals also? My family and friends from outside the country love to see those signs.
The slogan, "Welcome to the best small country in the world" always implied a poverty of spirit. It would have been more telling for the then Scottish Executive under Jack McConnell to have used that well Scottishism "you'll have had your tea" to welcome past visitors.
Is there really a need for slogans? Perhaps we can redress the negativity of the past by investing more in what brings people to Scotland - the people and their natural environment.
The antipathy to the slogan from Alex Salmond and the SNP seems slighlty odd to me when they spend so much time making the case for Scotland being able to emulate other small countries like Ireland and Norway, or what is sometimes referred to as the "arc of prosperity" in northern europe.
That seems to me to be about putting an independent Scotland on the same footing as other, small countries - so why not use some of the things Scotland (albeit not independent) has going for it to make the case for being the best of them ?
Its about time this ridiculous slogan is abandoned. If you've arrived at a Scottish airport or railway station on holiday then its clear you've been impressed with one quality or another and don't need confronted with this patronising nonsense. Also, what would happen if the Danes, Swiss or Irish (to name but a few impressive small countries) all claimed the same title? I'm Scottish and love the country but I'm not so arrogant as to think it is the best but I may be offended if I arrived at another small country to see them claiming to be.
What Jack's slogan really meant was:
Welcome to North Britain, happy with our regional status.
I prefer :
Welcome to Scotland, striving for nationhood.
If we are going to have a slogan I favour "Scotland for me"
It covers all of us already here and welcomes those just arriving:))
I should add that it was the title of a CD featuring traditional music which I spotted in a shop in Edinburgh a few weeks ago. I thought then it was a great title!
鈥淲elcome to the best small country in the world." The best at what, if not running our own affairs? The limits of Labour's ambition for Scotland exposed here in the added 'small'. Scotland's miles better, now that the executive is truly pro-Scotland.
Brian - I was with you on the "best small country in the world" thing until I was coming home from a family holiday to Tenerife.
Tell me what do you say to a bright eight year old girl who says "Daddy why is it the best SMALL country?"
鈥淲elcome to the best small country in the world." The best at what, if not running our own affairs? The limits of Labour's ambition for Scotland exposed here in the added 'small'. Scotland's miles better, now that the executive is truly pro-Scotland.
Brian
Where are the political issues in this piece? This is about branding, and not a particularly good piece of branding either, as it was a self evidently foolish slogan(if not arrogant-a perennilal failing).
On your closing sentence, FDR had, of course, presedential powers so could do pretty much what he wanted. Is that what we want for Scotland. Or was it just having a wee pop at Salmond for his ambitions?
Best small country in the world?
Scotland would rank about 115 out of 238 countries in terms of population size;
About 125 in terms of land mass;
About 47 in GDP per capita (2001 figures - don't know about updated figures);
About 95 in size of labour force
Whatever else we are, we're not a small country. Medium sized maybe?
Certainly further up the table than United finish in your average season ...
Some suggestions here:
Scotland......you'll have had your tea.
Scotland.....where they turn tonic wine into a national epidemic.
Scotland..deep fried and crunchy
Scotland....mair salt please.
brian, scotland is NOT the best wee country in the world,only those who are deluded would say that, BUT i have a feeling it could be,perhaps with some more T.L.C.and good houskepping, a tweek here and there, who knows?, but i'm now looking forward to aspiring to the best it can be.
I'd suggest a campaign of anagram based on Scotland and playing against the stereotypes many who visit may have.
Imagine a poster with "Cold Ants?" and maybe some shivering ants on it then of course a factoid about how warm Scotland is in summer.
Another "Cost Land?" perhaps an eco-aware branding with again a factoid on recycling measures.
A final one "Dot's Clan" a bunch of Scots in kilts with polka-dots, emphasising proud links with folks that have emigrated.
Scotland - Westminster in miniature
Brian
Would you prefer Welcome to North Brittan home of G. Brown. (G for Gazza)
I would have thought that the big political news story of the day was the fact that Wendy Alexanders husband was filmed supporting an independent Scotland at a seminar in May. Nothing in any of the Scottish media, I wonder why?
Just close your eyes and imagine the following. Alex Salmonds wife defends the union, while addressing the Auchtershoogle womens institute. Wonder what the headlines in all the Scottish media would be then.
Some balanced reporting would be nice once in a while from all the media, or do we need "The Times" for all our information?
Endemic lassitude! C'mon Bri, yer being excessively unfair. More of case of taking one's eye of the ball for a nanosec. You always come across as having a very good work ethic and if we [the readers] sniffed an ounce of lassitude, then we wouldn't blether wi ye!
The 'hundred days' slogan may first have been used in modern politics by FDR, but let's not forget that historians regularly talk of Napoleon's 'hundred days' ie. the approximate time between his departure from captivity on the isle of Elba and his final dramatic defeat at Waterloo. Are Labour and the SNP aware that by employing this slogan they are perhaps tempting fate? Also, how much can any administration really achieve in a period of just over three months?
All Scots greet YOU on your arrival in our land. Ceud mille failte! Welcome Home.
Have a picture to go with it of thousands of Scots (lots of children) waving Saltires with BIG smiles on their faces against a backdrop of mountains, trees and lochs.
Not a fan of the 'best small country' advert, purely because it seems arrogant. No one likes a show-off, especially when it's a wheezing, under-achieving alcoholic with the lowest life expectancy, lowest quality of life, highest violent crime rates, highest rate of suicides...maybe what the SNP were getting at was that they think that money could be better spent than on rose-tinted spectacles. Many of the Laboour administrations' marketing exercises have been very good ideas and raised awareness in the most effective way to our ADHD culture, but this one is pointless, banal, and a waste of money.
There's nothing wrong with trying to be the best wee country in the world, it just doesn't seem right to tell people we already are.
Hey Brian
tried to post a comment earlier to this blog and it didnt work. Has the labour party imposed a news blackout on you as well as the rest of scotland. This is the only reason i can think of for the fact that wendy alexanders husband supporting independence and the new investigation into labour "donations" as well as the tories lib dems and labour about to seize control of the parliament agaisnt the wishes of the scottish people havent made the news up here
Next thing you know we will be having martial law imposed.
High Brian
This isn't mischief making but care to offer any thoughts as to why the musings of Wendy Alexander's husband re: 'Independence and Fiscal Autonomy' haven't made it onto the pages of any Scottish papers?
Thank goodness for the web eh......oh and The Times!!
Come on Brian havnt you been on You Tube. Have you not seen the video "the best wee numpty in the world" The statement the best wee country in the world is tainted with Jack our ex first minister.
I liked the catch phrase ... and the "baby step" approach - first, be the best small country, then we'll take on the medium sized ones ...
Maybe the new government could also summon up the courage (and cash) to buy the "https://www.scotland.com/" domain name back from the US travel company who nabbed it in the early days of the internet. That way we could replace the rather hideous domain name we currently use - "https://www.scotlandistheplace.com/"
Is there really any cause to have such dim-wtted slogans at all? Surely the visitor can make up their own minds as to the state of the country without being cajoled from the outset. Maybe just a simple "Welcome to Scotland" would suffice?
To describe Scotland as "the best wee country in the world" sent a message that a) we can't compete with the big players and b)don't expect too much from us because actually we're pretty insignificant.
Well I'm working in New York at the moment because I'm better at my job than the local talent and there are thousands of my fellow countrymen doing exactly the same throughout the world.
Alex Salmond is correct -why not aspire to be the best country in the world with the best people and the best brains and stop cringing like Mr McConnell and his misguided ad campaigns?
鈥淲elcome to the best small country in the world."
As a Scot living in Sweden, every time I fly home I'm repulsed by this embarrassing slogan. Why? Well, personally, I find it a peculiar mix of arrogance, limited ambition and short sightedness. All with the stale taste of a Butlins holiday camp. However, even worse than that, it's hardly an endearing welcome to travellers from other small countries.
By contrast, flying into Stockholm Arlanda provides an excellent example of how to greet today's travellers. The airport design is first class and the marketing side of things focusses on the word Welcome, backed up with a wide variety of posters of famous and everyday Swedes.
It's a small example that highlights a broader point in the realm of small countries: Scotland could learn a lot from Scandinavia.
Returning to Scotland with French friends to meet this infantile slogan at the airport was just so embarrassing.
I am glad it is gone. It bespoke small-minded self regard and a dreadful lack of a bigger understanding of the world. A plain silly slogan, parochial, mawkish, inward looking and smug, all at the same time.
Any country which seeks to promote itself( at home too!) with a slogan like that has a problem with the way it sees itself, as is evident to any visitor reading it.
It is about as abnormal as not being independent.
Best small country in the world - pure dead brilliant - Let's just save the cost of this Marketing tripe which quite frankly makes us look rediculous. I cringe with shame every time I see it.
'Welcome to Scotland' will do just fine without any accompanying slogan.
Theo in Sweden is so right - get the country sorted out then you won't need a cheap slogan. We all know the good stuff about Scotland, but let's 'fess up about all the things that need to change before Scotland can hold its head up in the community of nations:
1) Stop celebrating Europe's least healthy lifestyle. Salad and mineral water doesn't get you salivating like a pie and a pint of 80, but you live healthier and longer. Oh, and stop treating excessive alcohol consumption as a joke - it's not. 2) Clean the place up! Civilised nations don't have litter-strewn pavements, verges and public spaces. 3) Invest in the housing stock so people are healthier, warmer and use less fuel. 4) Get anti-social behaviour off the streets - kids need to be told they have responsibilities as well as rights, and if they don't listen they need a swift metaphorical but painful kick up the backside. 5) Stop denying the scale and depth of the sectarian problem in the west of Scotland - banning the display of the Union Jack or Irish Tricolour at Ibrox and Parkhead would be a start. 6) Foster an entrepreneurial spirit - this more than anything else is what has made Ireland such a success. Wealth creation isn't the enemy of 'social justice' - if there's no wealth created there's nothing to be redistributed.
I'm tempted to add a seventh action point to make Scotland a great nation: namely getting Dundee FC back to their rightful place in the SPL... but maybe I shouldn't push my luck with Brian!
People and businesses who are the best at something don't actually have to tell other people that they're the best, you just KNOW that they're the best - by their attitudes, beliefs and, most importantly, their actions.
The underlying difference with the approach of our recent administrations is that the previous was inward-looking and this comes across clearly in their ill-advised chosen slogan.
Early days yet, but our new government 'appears' to be positive and outward looking, so hopefully they'll choose a relevant slogan or, even better, none at all.
I agree with the Scandinavian comment - arriving in Copenhagen is the same, no trite slogan but you are very subtly told that the people there are proud of their country.
According to the Federation of Small Businesses' annual Index of Wealth compared 10 countries on economic performance, employment rates, health and education, Scotland is the worst performing small country in Western Europe!
Instead of taking all those posters down, why not just paste the word 'worst' over 'best' and sit back and revel in the pubicity...
Scotland the most cowardly country in the world
Claim to be a country and fight to keep our own heritage, but are too scared to beome a nation and have any really responsibilty thrust on ourselves
New slogan for Scotland: Welcome to Scotland, watch out for the midgies.
One thing I've got to agree with Brian on - Prestwick's "Pure Dead Brilliant" branding is just an embarrassment. Imagine being greeted to Scotland as a visitor with that awful slogan? What message are they trying to send there..."Welcome to 1989"? Or "Watch out for neds"?? "
So Theo Craig (28) is "repulsed" by a slogan. Dont make me laugh.
I am repulsed by the sensless murder of young children and other such atrocities. I really think some people need a sense of perspective in their lives. This is way down the list of our nations priorities - sort out our health, our education, our sectarianism, our drink & drugs culture, our ned culture, our knife culture - and MAYBE THEN we can talk about relative trivia like this.
If you're looking for slogans, why not just 'Welcome To Scotland' and 'Come Back Soon'? The haste ye back/failte options won't be easily understood by foreigners (or even many natives!)
And yes, clean the country up a bit - it's like one gigantic rubbish tip!
Can I suggest that a more appropriate slogan for us, one day in the future, will be:
"Scotland, a country in the world".
Brian,
Sorry to stray from the topic but I could not let this pass!
"Martin wrote:
Scotland the most cowardly country in the world
Claim to be a country and fight to keep our own heritage, but are too scared to beome a nation and have any really responsibilty thrust on ourselves"
I presume Martin means Scotland has the most cowardly people in the world and is it not possible for a country to be cowardly - if so there is no place for this insulting post on this or any other blog - it makes you wonder what kind of people are natural SNP supporters.
Not all of us agree that we want an Independent Scotland - My brothers and our families voted SNP because of their pledge to replace Council Tax with a fairer system and we intended to decide what to do after delivery of that promise. However, if Martin is typical of the SNP it is doubtful if we will continue to do so.
This is the kind of negativity that Labour used to try and discourage people voting for the SNP - it did not work then and it won't work in reverse.
Alex Salmond should tell his supporters to put their brain in gear before their mouths, pens or keyboards.
I must admit when I arrived at Edinburgh Airport I didn't like arriving home to be greeted with "Welcome to the best small country in the World". It felt as if we are trying to make up for something. Scotland is a great country and we know that! How about just simply saying "Welcome to Bonnie Scotland - the greatest 'wee' county in the World!
Please do not judge the SNP on the posting of an anymous poster on a newspaper website. Judge the SNP on what they say and do. They can not be held responsible for the comments of every supporter, real or assumed.
Cheers
Donald