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Not Quite old Enough to be Their Mother

Victoria Derbyshire | 19:40 UK time, Thursday, 24 January 2008

I really enjoyed talking to 15 year old Katrina, 18 year old Cheryl and 17 year Eddie today about why so many young people seem to be getting involved in a life of crime, and how politicians, parents and the police should approach it. At times I did feel a bit like their Mum, but I was trying to get across to them that it really wasn't so different when I was 18 twenty years ago.

We too had nothing to do at that awkward age of 14/15 when you're too young for pubs but too old (and cool) for the guides. And we didn't even have mobile phones for entertainment. So we'd hang around at bus stops, near the row of shops, outside off-licences - groups of seven, eight, nine, ten of us - girls and lads, smoking, swearing and kissing. Maybe today we'd be called a gang, certainly "youths" possibly even "feral kids".

I never had any problem getting hold of cheap lager or cider - and I don't remember those who served me in the offy ever asking my age. Anyone who was told they were too young would get someone's older brother or sister to buy it for them. The alcohol tasted vile of course, but you'd get used to it after a while. It was easy to get hold of drugs too - cannabis, magic mushrooms, poppers.

Two out of three of those are dated now and cannabis is cheaper today than it was in the late 80s. What I never ever saw was a knife or a gun on the street. No one carried weapons. Fights happened and sometimes a snooker cue would be involved but that was about it.

When I asked Cheryl, Katrina and Eddie why they thought things were so bad in Britain in 2008 they all talked about family breakdown. More couples do divorce in 2008 than they did twenty years ago, but then couples stuck together even when they were very unhappy and I can't imagine that helped the kids a great deal.

My mum gave birth to me, her first child, alone. My father turned up at the hospital the next afternoon and said "Have you had it yet?". They were to be married for another 21 years before finally getting divorced. He was absent 75% of the time and when he was around he was violent.

If I'd gone off the rails I've very occasionally wondered if I'd have cited that as a possible explanation. Having stolen some makeup from Boots when I was 12 and lost my driver's license at 17 I can't really blame society, my upbringing or my parents - it was just my fault.

Comments

  1. At 12:04 AM on 25 Jan 2008, Stuart wrote:

    it seems a shame that according to the records displayed you wrote this message at 07.40pm, and not one person has posted a response. I say this because I can see yours and the current kids predicament. I ran a newsagents/post office from 2002-2007 in a run down area of oldham and when I took over saw one society, doing as you described Victoria, and when I left in 2007 saw the society that we are left with today, in those short years we have seen a complete change in society and personnel and respect, and i think that is the key, the respect for self, elders, society, authority has eroded in the last few years in a very short and sudden shock, and it is a culmination of many factors combining to produce a very damaging affect on todays youth. The most frightening thing for me from my view point is very current and disturbing. I have some friends for 20yrs plus who's son 18 mistakingly took a drug overdose on new years eve, nearly died, another friend 17 who is answerable to god amongst friends dealing with drink and drugs in NI, and been a self harmer, and another group I have no knowledge of, in southern wales committing suicide, and have witnessed girls choosing pregnancy as a way forward in my role as a newsagent. I have serious concerns for the future of our youth, a small section between currently 15 and 19 and a cross section I am aware of crossing all wealth and lack of boundries, suffering the same problems, I fear for their future, and how we as their responsable adults are treating them, it is the over 25 and parents at fault. Thankfully I have no children. What for example is the benefit to society of games such as a war game that encourages killing mullahs, not only the racism element, but the lack of respect for life, thats the problem, and the lack of respect for quality of life, there is a lot out there and crossing all wealth and status boundries. Worrying times ahead. Glad I have no children.

  2. At 07:58 AM on 25 Jan 2008, victoria wrote:

    Hi Stuart

    I wrote it 20 to 8 last night...but I think your posts can only go up there between 7am and 8pm, so give people a chance. It's also on my Facebook site though where a conversation can go on 24 hours a day.

    Thks

    Victoria

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