大象传媒 - WW2 People's War - The Loss of a Father

The Loss of a Father

by Researcher 250829

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Contributed by听: Researcher 250829
People in story:听: mrssvc
Location of story:听: Leeds
Article ID:听: A1339094
Contributed on:听: 10 October 2003

Mother was at work, as was normal in the war years, and we three children were at home waiting for her to return. We were aged, 12, 10 and 8 years old.

There was a knock on the door, and when I answered it there was a telegram boy, probably about 14 years old, who handed me a telegram. I didn't notice, nor would I have understood, the relevance of the black border round the envelope. Mother returned from work shortly after and I pointed out the telegram which was propped against the clock on the shelf over the fireplace. Then the world seemed to fall apart. There was no support, no funeral, just a return of personal items and get on as best you could. She did manage to visit the grave in a war cemetery in Tunisia some 30 years later.

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Message 1 - 12 10 & 8

Posted on: 10 October 2003 by kathleen Rimmer

You tell us you just had to get on with it. How did you get on with it? Your lives must have been very hard, apart from the loss of your Dad, how did you cope for money, how were you treated at school, did you as a family grieve? May be you just blocked your minds to the whole awful situation, It is of course because of people like your Dad that we can live as we do today in freedom.Thank you for telling us your story

听

Message 2 - 12 10 & 8

Posted on: 12 October 2003 by paul gill - WW2 Site Helper

I would echo what Kathy said.
I can understand how you felt as I too experienced the appalling effect of parental loss as a kid in the 60's. It took me 30 years to talk about it and I still find funerals unbearable.
I got little sympathy at school. From your description I now wonder if this was a reflection of attitudes from teachers who were themselves mostly WW2 veterans.

You are one of the main victims of war. You have a story to tell here, albeit a very painful one but it needs telling and is virtually unrecorded by the history books.

I was unaware until your story that the telegrams were so ominously distinctive.
Was your mum given any time off work?
Were your friends told by the school?
Did you get any more information on how your dad died?
Did other relatives help financially or let you visit them?

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