大象传媒

Worrying times for sure, if this is all the NME can offer. Their annual, four-band UK tour has been on a great run for about seven years, bringing the likes of Coldplay, The Coral, The Thrills, Kaiser Chiers and Franz to our attention (all five played the lucky "opening" slot to half empty venues) while showing off The Killers, Arctic Monkeys and, erm... Andrew W.K. at the peak of their powers.

This time around... well, the buzz isn't what it should be and understandably so. It's their weakest bill ever. But let's not dismiss the whole thing yet.

Ting Tings are just one girl, one boy and a collection of big pop hooks. Definitely the most interesting act on the bill, although they struggle a little going on first, with a reasonably cold, sparse gathering. The tunes are fantastic - from opener and instantly likeable current single 'Great DJ' to future anthem 'That's Not My Name' ...but more help onstage would definitely help do them justice. Vocalist Katie White is a star - as likeable as Lovefoxx and an even better dancer. It's early days for them, but that potential will shine through, wait and see.

Does It Offend You, Yeah?, on the other hand, are an atrocity to everything that is good and true about music in the 21st century. Take the Klaxons - remove all the charm, any semblance of a tune, anything vaguely unique... and you're left with a band a hundred times better than these total chancers. For those of us down the front, after a few beers, the hefty beats, FX and squealing synths may be enough to make us move, but think about it - anyone can hammer at a drum kit and make nice squelchy noises on a half decent keyboard. 'Let's Make Out' gathers together everything worth hating about this band, and even then it's performed poorly. Horrible. Who signed this lot anyway? Having said that, their last tune was actually quite good.

If Does it Offend You, Yeah? are a (very) poor man's Klaxons, Joe Lean band the Jing Jang Jong are, I guess, a poor mans Libertines. But everyone's a poor man's something these days, so as long as they offer a few decent tunes and something even a little bit fresh, we're happy enough. And Joe Lean do both. 'Lucio Starts Fires' is arguably the anthem of the night and there's at least a handful of new tracks that should make for a decent debut album. They are ridiculously styled and wear outrageously tight trousers, but let's not be picky.

Thank the lord of indie for The Cribs, then. Good old, reliable Cribs. Now armed with an impressive collection of songs everyone knows, they have it easy tonight. The twins may not be sharing much of their legendary banter, but there's no time for that. Five sing-alongs in the first half hour ('Mens Needs', 'I'm a Realist', 'Hey Scenesters' et all) and the Mandela is one big, beer soaked, happy mess. After just two (dodgy) shows in Belfast over the years, they were as hungry as we were - it was their for the taking.

It may have been on an unguarded plate, but The Cribs well and truly stole the show.

Rigsy