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To impress at the Comedy Store in London. It’s my first open spot in London and probably my biggest gig to date. I don’t mention being a disabled comedian on my website as I disagree with using it as an advantage, but I do talk about my disability in my act.

Ambitious, creative, driven.

Getting pushed off a slide at nursery and hurting myself quite badly. Another early memory is from when I was four years old. I dropped a toy down a drain and my friend picked the cover up to help me get it out. He accidentally dropped the cover on my right hand. I ended up losing two fingers and the range of movement and grip. It was pretty scary at the time but overall it’s been a positive thing. It gives me different material to talk about, and helps me stand out a bit.

Gigs. I find it really difficult to turn anything down, even if it is unpaid, because it’s a chance to try out new material. People are always amazed at how many performances I do.

Facebook. The amount of time I spend on it is horrific. There have been times I’ve just wanted to come off it completely, it’s such a distraction, but on the other hand it’s a really good way of building up contacts and fans, and of showcasing new material.

A Caribbean cruise for my step mums 50th last December. It sounds glamorous but it rained half the time and the sea was really bumpy.

What I’m doing for the rest of the day. I don’t drink, so I’m quite good at getting up early when I’m touring, and going out to see the sites wherever I am.

Presenting a comedy show on TV, or even better, combining travel with comedy, like Ricky Gervais has done with An Idiot Abroad.

Watching a comedian called Terry Alderton, who I was on the bill with in Glasgow. Normally comedians will be busy analysing someone else’s jokes instead of just enjoying them, but he really made me laugh.

Go to Machu Picchu in Peru. And I’ve always said I wanted to go to the Amazon, so South America would really be the dream.

People who are unkind and who put you down. You should always treat others how you want to be treated. I see a lot more disrespect and unkindness in young people now.

Buy a brand new sports car. When I was working in banking I used to spend a lot of money on new cars, which was just crazy. You lose so much money, and if you’re looking to that sort of thing to make you happy you aren’t going to get anywhere. The things that are really of value are free-your health, your family, your friends.

•Stuart performs regularly around the country. For details of upcoming gigs visit his

Comedy. I’m a real geek when it comes to writing jokes, looking at structure, wordplay, that sort of thing. When talking about my disability on stage, I often say that I am missing two fingers as I went to a rough school in Glasgow where they took the game rock, paper and scissors very seriously - but on the plus side when it came to maths I was rather good at fractions!