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Delilah Morris-Piper gives a police interview

Watch Delilah giving her initial statement

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Transcript of the interview:

Now then, what do I remember? Don't rush me聟 My memory's a very shy creature, needs to be coaxed out. By the way, how is it that you lot always look so fantastic? No lumps, no bumps, no wrinkles. So young, so fresh, must be the uniform, I think聟

I am getting on with it... The match, I remember that of course. If you ask me, Taylor absolutly threw it. If it hadn't been Ramon, that rather young dishy player, I think...what?..Yes, I'm just coming to that! Now don't interrupt me, my memory's not what it was聟

Party, yes, there was definately a party. I'm pretty sure there was a party. Some dreadful charity thing, I think. Soccer-loving whale orphans in distress or something ghastly. And Warren Taylor was there, all over the place, playing the big 'I am'. I think he needed taking down a peg or two and I am just the woman to do it...

Pardon? Did I notice something wrong about the party? Well, yes. I mean, cheese and pineapple. On sticks! How seventies is that? Hardly shouts class, does it? I don't know what it says about the club, either. I am keeping to the point, Warren Taylor聟 OK... lovely eyes, long, long legs, great stamina and a fantastic finish as I remember.

The party? Getting back to the party. Do you know, between you and me I think I might have been a llittle bit tipsy? Yes, I did tip a jug of claret over him but it was non-vintage, I mean cheapskates, what can you do? He was not so cocky then? What can I say? I'm a passionate woman and when a man disappoints me, he knows about it. Did you see that penalty he missed?

What? Then, after the whole claret thing, I retired to the ladies' for a little聟 don't know how long聟 I blame the chicken wraps - caterers you see, not cooks - there's a difference, trust me. What else did happen? Something criminal did happen. My mobile, completely gone, absolutly missing. You couldn't find one of those nice young men to have a look for it, see what they can rustle up? No, perhaps later.

What? Yes, I think there might have been someone there with me聟 It's a wee bit hazy聟 Well, it could have been Lloyd Lovell聟 Lloyd? Lovely manners聟 big hands聟 delicate fingers though聟 He said what? He found me in the lavvie? Doing what? I don't think so. I'm sorry. I have a reputation to think of. I have a daytime television show, you know. Why should I be doing something like that? No, that's all I remember. I don't think I can help you any further聟 Unless you'd like an autograph? Or anything?

Well, I'll tell you what. This has all been a dreadful ordeal. I think I've got one of my heads coming on. I'll have to take something for it. You haven't got any gin around the place, have you?