大象传媒

By Nicholas

Day 3.

Was put in this cave just now. Thought I'd start a diary. I thought I would be accepted in my family, but no. I was the one who got put in the smelly cave. And I don't think they even care!

Day 5.

Honestly, Dad steals a bull from the gods, Mum gets punished by giving birth to a monstrous creature. I'm human from the shoulders up, but I get put in a cave. They say I'm 鈥渕onstrous鈥�, but I think I'm quite handsome. I mean, I didn't ask for the bottom half of a bull. Dad should be the one here, not me!

Day 365.

Nothing much has happened. A bit depressed... Decided to call myself Dave. Or James. Or Marvin... Yeah, Marvin. Marvin the Minotaur. Quite catchy, that.

Day 728.

Two days until I've been here two whole tedious years. Two years! Still I don't think they care... Nobody came to look at me... I ate a spider for the first time today. Interesting taste, not very filling.

Day 1,460.

Four years. Tried to escape. I think I'm in a maze. Or is it a labyrinth? I cant decide. Whatever it is it's long, twisty, damp and has quite a stink.

Day 3,286.

Yesterday was my ninth birthday. Some smelly child came along. I was so ravenous, I ate him. I should have been more friendly, I'm all alone now... Found trail of beans. Going to follow it, then take a nap.

Day 3,287.

Well, there was party guests at the end of the trail. But the seven girls fainted, and the six boys left trampled everyone to death. Not much of a party.

Day 3,300.

Smell of rotting corpses is putting me off these dried beans... And it's a shame, they're a lot tastier than stupid old spiders.

Day 9,330.

Moped around a bit. Looked at walls. Named one crack Jeremy, not sure if he's a guy or a gal though... It's really dark in here. Wish they'd send me some matches one day... I wonder how I'd light them with these hooves though?..

Day 9,350.

Quite hungry. Very lonely. Five days until my birthday. I hope they send food. I'd like a cake, but all they ever send is smelly kids. I'd love to know what chocolate cake tastes like. Presents, too. Like a scented candle, to go with those matches. My cave really reeks of death.

Day 9,354.

Tomorrow is my birthday! Meanwhile, I ate a spider. I don鈥檛 know if it was poisonous. Nothing bad has happened yet.

Day 9,355.

27th birthday! No cake. I can hear someone coming near me, though... Yay, I can see light! They brought candles! String too! I've never had string! I think string might be fun to play with; And he has a sword! Much more innovative than just trampling them to death... Wait, what are you doing? Stop it! I stopped eating people years ago! And stop wrestling me! This isn't the Olympics, you know!