大象传媒

As the number of innocent young people being knifed on our streets rises, so do the voices of community leaders and the media in their condemnation and hatred of the killers.

But what about the people who are most closely affected by the violent and sudden death of a loved one? How do they try and come to terms with what has happened and how does it impact on their lives?

Gee Walker’s son Anthony was brutally killed in a racially motivated attack in 2005. Today – nearly 15 years later – she is still struggling with the pain and loss. But one thing she is not struggling with is forgiveness.

Only days after Anthony’s death, she forgave his killers and it was widely reported in the press at the time that she had quoted the last words of Jesus on the cross to express her feelings: “Forgive them because they know not what they do.”

In an interview with the former bishop of Liverpool – Bishop James Jones – for the Good Friday Meditation on Radio 4, she talks about why she doesn’t hate the men who took her son from her.

“I watched those children grow up together and play together,” she says. “As a mother I still see them as someone else’s child. And if it were mine, I wouldn’t like someone else to hate my child… or wish them harm or seek revenge. If it were my child, I would have liked them to be forgiven and to be released from that burden of hate.”

When Bishop Jones suggests to Gee that some people might say they are so hurt and damaged by someone that they could never forgive that person. Gee replies: “I’m just trying to struggle to survive the pain of loss and I can’t take any more. I don’t think I could cope with the added burden of the hate. I know it would take its toll on me and not only me, but my family. It would have an impact on them which wouldn’t be positive.”

So Anthony’s legacy is his mother’s decision not to hate because when her 5-year-old grand-daughter sits on her knee, knowing that nanny is feeling sad, Gee says: “I’d rather they see me sad rather than see hate. I’d rather they feel the vibe of love… the attitude of love… rather than pick up on my hate and anger.”

Listen to Bishop James Jones's Good Friday Meditation on 大象传媒 Sounds.