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Phil Mitchell – EastEnders

A king among soap opera bad guys. Phil, played by Steve McFadden, has been in EastEnders for almost 35 years and it would be impossible to list all the awful things he’s done to people in that time. To name just a few, he’s slept with his own brother’s wife, set fire to The Queen Vic, raised his own son horribly – including lying to him about his own mother’s faked death – and cheated on, harassed or attacked just about every person in Albert Square. Natalie, who of course plays Sonia in EastEnders, says, “I don’t care what soap you’re into – and I know I’m biased – but I think [Phil] is the best TV villain.” She says the first time she had a big angry scene with Phil screaming and shouting, “I thought, ‘Oh I’ve made it now.’”

Simon Cowell

Name-checked by Joanna, Simon Cowell has been upsetting contestants and amusing audiences since the days of Pop Idol. Until he came along, judges on talent shows typically liked to be kind in their criticism, even when the people performing clearly needed to find a new dream. Cowell tells people exactly what he thinks of them and their skills. It changed the entire genre and made Cowell a star in the UK and America. Being on the receiving end of Cowell’s witty put-downs became almost a badge of honour.

Lisa Vanderpump

Reality TV shows are fuelled by fights and face-offs. You can always rely on Lisa Vanderpump to provide those. Originally a member of the cast of Real Housewives Of Beverly Hills, Vanderpump’s skill for creating drama and great telly made her a household name and saw her graduate to her own show, Vanderpump Rules. Off The Telly listener Shay says the things that make Vanderpump a memorable reality TV villain is her ability to “rub someone up the wrong way, manipulate someone, and make them think something different.” If reality TV shows were all about people getting along, nobody would watch them. You need the fireworks. You need people like Vanderpump.

Tanya Turner – Footballers’ Wives

If you’ve never seen Footballers’ Wives then you have missed out on an icon of TV villainy. Tanya Turner, brilliantly played by Zoe Lucker, had a serious knack for coming up with creative ways to be awful. As listener Matt says, “She was completely evil but hilarious at the same time.” Her plots included swapping her baby with a rival’s – a scheme that included fake-tanning the baby, for reasons too wild to go into here – and hiding her husband’s heart pills, then having sex with him to make him have a heart attack and die. As Natalie says, she was “Fan. Tastic.”

Paul Robinson – Neighbours

There’s room on the list for "light villains", people who you might not want to be friends with but aren’t completely evil. One listener calls in to suggest Paul Robinson from Neighbours. Compared to others on this list, Paul is not a particularly bad guy. He’d often con people in business deals, trick neighbours, and cheat on his girlfriends, but he never murdered anyone and that is apparently the bar we’re working to with some of these wrong’uns.

Paul Gorton – The Traitors

Joanna gives a shout-out to Paul from The Traitors, who she calls “a huge character”. Paul was one of the highlights of the show’s fantastic second season, betraying absolutely anyone who got in his way in his quest to win the big cash prize. And in the style of the very sneakiest villains, he did it while smilingly convincing everyone he was being a nice guy. Paul was a traitor from episode one and he took that job seriously, backstabbing multiple fellow traitors. He might have got away with it and won the whole thing, but he hadn’t reckoned on one person who seemed even nicer, yet was even more ruthless: Harry.

Joffrey – Game Of Thrones

Listener Amy gives her vote to King Joffrey from Game Of Thrones, played by Jack Gleeson. His most evil moments include having Ned Stark beheaded, murdering a woman with a crossbow just for fun, and making his wife Sansa’s life a constant misery. His terrible deeds eventually caught up with him in suitably dramatic fashion. “It was the most satisfying thing seeing him get poisoned to death at his own wedding,” says Amy. Brutal, perhaps, but nobody could argue he didn’t have it coming. One of the most memorable comeuppances in TV history.

Pat Phelan – Coronation Street

Listener Fiona sums up the great appeal of villains with her suggestion. She votes for Pat Phelan from Coronation Street and says, “He was so horrible he actually made me super-angry, but I sort of really liked him at the same time.” And isn’t that what makes a perfect bad guy? Pat Phelan, who was in the soap on and off from 2013 to 2018, was relentlessly horrible. He was a con artist, a fraud, a violent thug and a murderer. His horrible crimes eventually caught up with him when he was stabbed and killed by Anna, a woman he had tormented for years.