大象传媒

2/3. On the Road. Writer and stand-up performer AL Kennedy wonders if it's so important to her, then why does she spend so little time there?

After all, a writer these days is seldom at home. There are therefore, she muses, all manner of things to be learned about your accommodation options: avoid rooms over pubs where the new day's clean linen is dumped on the carpet outside every door; try and insist on running water, maybe of two different temperatures and only from the taps. How to deal with posh room service, dodgy room service, in-room picnics and the lack of kettles across Europe.

Is it, she wonders, worth learning conversational breakfast phrases in other languages?

Perils to avoid: noise, light, the crazy people next door, the people having sex next door, the lift
doing TARDIS impersonations all night, free-floating despair, the ventilator that funnels smoke into your bathroom, the mayhem that breaks out in the streets at 3am, wildlife, health difficulties and the
almost universally insane people who run B&B's.

Producer: Mark Smalley.