大象传媒

Worry

Good morning.聽 Just about a year ago I was told I was seriously ill.聽 I鈥檇 had various tests and was waiting for the diagnosis.聽 If you鈥檝e ever been in that position - perhaps you are now - you鈥檒l know just how agonising the waiting is.聽 Every hour is like a day and every day like a week.

While I was waiting for the diagnosis, I said to a friend that I wasn鈥檛 looking forward to Christmas with this uncertainty hanging over me and that I was going to cancel the treat I鈥檇 planned for the following day.聽 It wasn鈥檛 anything very grand - just a day out doing some Christmas shopping and going to a favourite caf茅 for lunch.聽 But how could I enjoy that, when the future was so uncertain - even though I could do nothing about it?

My friend had been in a similar situation a few years ago and she said, 鈥淚 don鈥檛 think you should let worry about tomorrow spoil today.鈥澛� I wasn鈥檛 really in the mood to take her advice, but in the end I did and when I look back on that day, I realise it gave me a disproportionate amount of pleasure.聽

There鈥檚 nothing new about this advice.聽 It鈥檚 really what Jesus told his followers two thousand years ago.聽 He said: 鈥淒on鈥檛 worry about tomorrow - tomorrow will have enough troubles.鈥澛� But knowing that and doing it are two different things.聽 What helped me was to try and change my thinking the same way you might try to change the focus of your eyes - instead of looking into the distance, you try to focus on something just in front of your nose.聽

So I tried to keep my thoughts firmly in the present and when I did that, I found I could really enjoy momentary pleasures: that first cup of tea when you come home from hospital, a friend taking me to buy a new pair of shoes when I couldn鈥檛 drive, even sharing a dark joke with a fellow patient.聽 Small pleasures, but they get you through the bad times.

Lord, instead of always fretting about a future which we cannot change, help us to live each moment in the present.聽 May we learn to live with our worries and realise that there are moments of light in the darkness. Amen.