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Ruth Scott, Anglican Priest and Quaker:

Today is both Valentine鈥檚 Day and Ash Wednesday. Not the most obvious pairing except that, in different ways, both are concerned with love. Valentine鈥檚 Day celebrates romantic love, while Ash Wednesday turns attention to empathetic love. It鈥檚 the first day of Lent during which Christians reflect on the life of Jesus, particularly his ministry, suffering and death. His story shows how he understood people so deeply that he couldn鈥檛 allow them to suffer alone. He stood by them, however costly that might be. He was also able to celebrate their good news because he knew how hard won that sometimes was. I鈥檝e experienced this type of love on many occasions, but two examples stand out for me. Last year, often when I was too ill to respond, my husband Chris, my own Valentine, spent hours sitting quietly by my hospital bed holding my hand because he understood how essential that touch was for me. By the end of my cancer treatment he was exhausted, but I couldn鈥檛 have got through without him.

On a lighter note, when I was up and about again, we spent a few days away in Cornwall. On the last night, we went out for dinner in Charlestown Harbour. 鈥淎re you celebrating anything in particular?鈥� asked the manager, Conrad. 鈥淏eing alive,鈥� I replied. He noted my bald head and nodded. It turned out that he too, had lived through cancer. He understood that when you don鈥檛 know whether or not you鈥檒l be around for much longer, every day is precious. At the end of our meal, when the bill came, the total was zero. Thinking it was a mistake Chris went to sort it out. But it was no mistake - Conrad was giving us the meal as a gift to celebrate the 鈥渂attle鈥� he knew we鈥檇 been through. I was deeply moved by this act of compassionate care. While Valentine鈥檚 Day may leave some of us feeling excluded because we鈥檙e not in a romantic relationship, Conrad reminds me that all of us can be involved in living out empathetic love, and that鈥檚 something definitely worth practising and celebrating.聽 聽 聽聽聽