大象传媒

Ruth Scott, Anglican Priest and Quaker:

A friend was telling me how, until recently, he worked constantly. He said his busy-ness was the equivalent of putting his fingers in his ears, shutting his eyes and singing at the top of his voice to drown out inner thoughts and feelings that were too painful to explore. The day came when suddenly his avoidance tactics no longer worked, and he had to face the grief inside himself. Although it was tough and his emotions were often turbulent, he was aware of a calmness beginning to settle his spirit as he worked through the questions and doubts that exploded into consciousness. 鈥淚 wish I鈥檇 listened to myself years ago,鈥� he said.

He鈥檚 not alone in that sentiment. As a priest I鈥檝e heard many people say that breakdown or serious illness stopped them in their tracks and brought them to their senses about their priorities. The 鈥榙ross鈥� of daily life they鈥檇 once thought essential, fell away, the 鈥榦ughts, shoulds and have tos鈥� evaporated, and there was sudden clarity about what or who meant the world to them. I understand that. Spending much of last year in hospital I had time to reflect not only on my own life, but also on wider, so-called 鈥榥ormal鈥� life.

I noticed the number of news reports about people struggling to keep up with daily demands, and the rise in mental ill-health statistics. I wondered how many of us are following my friend鈥檚 example, blocking out unwelcome but persistent inner voices calling us to stop and take stock. It will be a pity if we ignore them until either they erupt out, or illness confronts us with the extent to which we鈥檝e placed importance on unimportant things.

Faith teaches the essential human need of taking time to reflect on experience and to understand what lies at its heart, to listen as well to the inner still small voices, as the more urgent ones crying out to be heard. Life is a gift to be nurtured and treasured not neglected and trampled. Why wait until emotions overwhelm us, or mortality catches up with us, before working out what really matters.