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Expectations

Hazel loves her job. It鈥檚 invigorating and work is her identity but there鈥檚 pressure on her to leave. Normally a great decision maker, this choice is proving impossible to make.

Hazel loves her job. She is very good at. But there is pressure on her to leave.

An impressive career has led Hazel to a perfect job at The University of Chichester: it鈥檚 stimulating, she loves the students and she is widely respected.

With no age discrimination, Hazel could continue forever. And she would like to. Work is her very identity and the idea of pootling around the garden and joining a choir fills her with horror. But Hazel suspects friends, family and colleagues think it is time to go.

鈥淭he expectation seems to be, from a lot of people, that I will give it all up, that my right job is to look after the grandchildren a bit, do a bit of painting and care for Phil, but that isn鈥檛 me, it isn鈥檛 me at all.鈥

When her husband, Phil, is diagnosed with Parkinson鈥檚, the pressure escalates but Hazel doesn't see her future as just his carer.

鈥淭he joy of Phil鈥檚 and my relationship is that we鈥檝e always been independent of each other. I don鈥檛 want to rush off and leave him, but I don鈥檛 want the burden of having the life sucked out of both of us.鈥

She feels judged for thinking this, for not abandoning her career to look after Phil, but if she were a man, would expectations be different?

Hazel has always been a clear-headed decision maker. She knew within 10 minutes of meeting her husband she should marry him. She even wants to write her PhD on decision-making. But this choice is proving impossible to make. What should she and what will she decide?

Producer: Sarah Bowen

Available now

28 minutes

Last on

Thu 5 Dec 2019 23:30

Broadcasts

  • Mon 25 Nov 2019 11:00
  • Thu 5 Dec 2019 23:30

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