大象传媒

I recently conducted an outdoor blessing ceremony for some newly-wedded friends of mine. It was like a festival. They filled a farmer鈥檚 field with food and drink stalls, live bands and a spinning fairground ride that sent guests running to the portaloos. A bouncy castle and a free ice cream van added to the fun. And that was just for the adults. It was an unforgettable day. One brimming with laughter and unforgivable dancing.

I was so happy and relieved for my friends. They鈥檇 endured such bad luck and disappointment. Moving house and starting a new hospitality business - just weeks before Covid happened. And repeated postponements of their big day and honeymoon. Yet what struck me was how they coped with it all. Not with complaint or panicked despair - although I鈥檓 sure they had bad days. But with a positive, cheerful and hopeful attitude.听鈥業t鈥檒l be right,鈥櫶�was their lovely Yorkshire-tinged mantra.

I took inspiration from their example when we had to cancel our family holiday last month. Well, I听tried听to. We were gutted. It was hard not to fume and complain about the sun-kissed Mediterranean beaches we wouldn鈥檛 be lying on. Coping well with disappointment is a hard life skill to master. For me anyway. I find it all too easy to become chewed up and irate when things go wrong or get complicated.听I鈥檝e been learning from the wisdom of the so-called 鈥榩atron saint of the disappointed鈥� - John Henry Newman.听A giant of the Christian faith.听His life was full of crushing lows and backward steps.听Yet he used them to grow his inner life and improve his state of mind.Learning to stay patient and amiable in the face of disappointment.听It made all the difference. Strengthening his resolve. Deepening his faith. And helping him to savour life鈥檚 lovely times.

I tried to channel my inner Saint John on our quickly rearranged听holiday - to the bracing Yorkshire East Coast. I wasn鈥檛 exactly singing renditions of听鈥楽ummer Holiday鈥櫶�as we drove there. Not with the windscreen wipers on full speed and our twins clawing at each other in the back. But we got there - and weren鈥檛 disappointed. Grateful for the refreshing sea, haddock and chips and penny arcades. It wasn鈥檛 quite Andalucia, Zoe - but definitely good for the soul.