Katie, 27, gave birth to identical triplets Tommy, Joshua and Eddie last year. She shares her story and talks about the challenges of being a mum-of-four.
Being pregnant with triplets
The sonographer at our 12 week scan said they were detecting three heart beats. To be honest, I was absolutely terrified. I鈥檇 never even heard of anyone having had triplets, let alone considered it could happen to us. We already had Jacob, who at that point was four years old. I cried and got a little bit hysterical, they had to ask me if it was ok to carry on. My partner Rob was completely silent, and he鈥檇 turned as white as a sheet.
We went for a follow-up scan at Liverpool Women鈥檚 Hospital later on. The doctor said: 鈥淚鈥檓 just going to say it now, I鈥檝e never seen this kind of pregnancy. It鈥檚 likely that the team in Wrexham have probably got it wrong.鈥 He didn鈥檛 really talk much, but eventually he confirmed that I was having triplets. He turned to me and said: 鈥淚 can鈥檛 believe it. I鈥檝e never ever seen this kind of pregnancy, I鈥檝e only ever researched it.鈥
Giving birth to triplets
They managed to fit 33 people into this tiny room for the birth. Each baby needed to have a team of people to deliver them. They were giving me magnesium to make sure the babies鈥 brains were protected during labour. They gave me an epidural but I begged the doctors not to knock me out as it wasn't what I wanted. The surgeon was lovely and allowed that. It was all really scary, but they made me feel absolutely like they knew what they were doing.
My only regret is not videoing the birth because everybody in the room cheered and clapped. The babies came out a minute apart and I felt so euphoric after all that stress. Everyone was so happy, patting me on the head and telling me the boys were fine. I saw the triplets briefly before they put each of them in their cot, made sure they were ok and then whisked them away for tests.
Getting organised with four children
I鈥檓 not really an organised person. I can be a bit chaotic, so I had to teach myself to be organised when it came to sleeping and feeding schedules. Having triplets really forces you to think about how to plan your time. I did a lot of research: I spoke to every paediatrician I could. Nowadays I am military when it comes to naps and sleeping.
With our first-born Jacob, we rocked him to sleep every day. It would get to a point where he would be 9 months old (and quite heavy) and we鈥檇 be spending an hour rocking him to sleep. We were not having it the same way with the triplets. From day one I鈥檝e always put the boys down awake for naps or bedtime. That was the only way it was going to work.
I know for a fact that my babies feel loved - I hug them and kiss them all the time. Now that we have a clear sleep and feeding schedule we actually have time to do other things. Because the boys are so used to their routine now, they never really cry. When there鈥檚 a whinge or they start to get a bit clumsier, I know it鈥檚 nap time. I think babies need that stability; the safety of knowing what鈥檚 coming next.
Relationships and sleep deprivation
The best advice I was given is that you cannot make any rash decisions about your relationship in the first year of having kids. Sleep deprivation and sheer exhaustion, even with one baby, let alone four, mean that you鈥檙e obviously going to be rowing more 鈥 it鈥檚 completely normal. We were just so much more exhausted and there were definitely points where we were taking it out on each other. You do get through it though, and as soon as you start sleeping you become a bit more rational. That鈥檚 the thing I would like people to know - you will sleep again!
The cost of having triplets
When we first found out we were having triplets, we thought 鈥渉ow are we going to afford everything?鈥 We did have to adjust our finances somewhat. I鈥檝e become brilliant at setting money aside, as it鈥檚 not cheap having four boys, but we鈥檝e got a brilliant support network around us. People were extremely generous. My best friend gave me bags full of clothes, baby wipes, bibs, and muslin cloths.
Rob鈥檚 best mate came to the hospital after they鈥檇 been born and gifted us some money in an envelope for each of the boys. He said to us, 鈥淚 know it鈥檚 expensive and I didn鈥檛 know what to give you.鈥 Our local pub did a fundraiser for us when they found out about the triplets being born, and people even dropped off wipes and nappies on our doorstep. It鈥檚 been brilliant seeing how kind and generous people can be.
How to balance the needs of a family with triplets
We went out of our way to keep our eldest son Jacob involved with his brothers. We never pushed them on him and after a while he started asking to hold them. The bond between Jacob and the triplets is just amazing. Sometimes when they鈥檙e all chirping and shouting for their dinner he will say: 鈥淢um, they鈥檙e doing my head in,鈥 and I tell him he can go chill out in his bedroom if he wants some space. He doesn鈥檛 have to sit there and listen to them if he doesn鈥檛 feel like it. Crying triplets can be stressful enough for adults, so I can鈥檛 expect a five-year-old to find it easy.
I try not to expect too much from him. He is absolutely brilliant and I am so proud of him, I really couldn鈥檛 have asked for more from him.
Katie's tips
- Surround yourself with positive people
At the beginning we got a lot of support from grandparents who rallied round. They said 鈥榳e鈥檒l take Jacob for a bit鈥 or 鈥榳e鈥檒l watch the babies鈥 whenever they could. Having positive support makes a massive difference.
- Do your research
Speak to medical professionals and get advice if you鈥檙e looking to implement a routine. I spoke to everyone I could find and asked loads of questions.
- Be kind to yourself
When I was in hospital I would forget to take my painkillers and rest because I was so focussed on everything that was going on. I鈥檇 say don鈥檛 forget to take your painkillers, go for a long shower, make sure you stay hydrated and prioritise rest.
For more information and support about raising twins, triplets and multiples check out .
