There's No-One Quite Like Grammar...
History is littered with examples of things which are a bad idea. The Nazi invasion of Russia, trench warfare, hang-gliding over live volcanoes, Chico...as a species, we humans revel in our own imperfections and mistakes, right? Well, break out the champagne and crack open a box of Maltesers, we've got some SERIOUS revelling to do, people!
It seems that in their finite wisdom, Maroon 5 have unveiled a hitherto hidden nonsensical side to their nature, as they've elected to call their new album 'It Won't Be Soon Before Long'.
Let's just take another look at that, it's a little hard to take in, first time around.
The new Maroon 5 album will be called 'It Won't Be Soon Before Long'...
Now, straight away two problems emerge which would seem to point to this being an extremely bad idea.
PROBLEM THE FIRST: 'IT WON'T BE SOON BEFORE LONG'? SERIOUSLY? That's the kind of sentence no-one is ever going to get right. All over the country people are going to be wandering into shops and asking for "'It Won't Be Long Before Lo...no...hang on...bah! Just GIVE ME THE DAMN MAROON 5 ALBUM, ALRIGHT?"
And that's before you even go NEAR search engines, which will probably collapse or something.
The total forgettableness of a title like this is because although it's got words in it, all of which make sense on their own, once they are all put together, rationality disappears in a puff of library dust. It's more of a word collage than an actual sentence.
Doubtless the band see things in a different way. They'll like the ambiguity and the knowing wink of a title which that sounds like it means something important, but doesn't. That's, like, TOO MUCH...
So, to dispel this smart-arsery, I've had a bit of a think about what it COULD mean, and this is as far as I've got...
'It Won't Be Soon Before Long' could, at a push, mean 'this thing you are waiting for will happen before you know it, and then 'soon' will have become 'now' and your wait will be over'
So, the suggested ambiguous wisdom in the title is little more that your dad saying "just a few more miles and we'll be nearly there...", only re-written. Which leads me to the second problem.
PROBLEM THE SECOND: Who wrote this? Yoda? Gandalf after a blow to the head? One of Scooch? It's RUBBISH.
Levine, take your album back to your desk and DO IT AGAIN!
NOW BOY!
Maroon's latest single, reviewed by Chartblog
Comments
I read that it was their mantra on tour when everything was getting all stressy or whatever. Sounds pretty weird though. It could also mean that whatever you want is way off in the distance and it isn't getting any closer.
And are you dissing the Yoda, Sir? Picking on the little green dude is just uncool!
[Yoda dissing am I not. But sense his first language not is. - Fraser]
im with kat, fair review until you turn on poor little yoda and wise old gandalf...and then grouping them with the language skills of a member of scooch...anyway im sure its not just gandalf who speaks like that after a knock to the head
and "but sense his first language not is" doesnt make sense even if its yoda saying it, whereas 'but sense his first language makes not' does, i think :S
You're right, Kerri. Think it's a toss-up between that and "but is sense his first language not". But we can't hold Fraser to the same awesomely high standards as Yoda. The little green dude had a couple hundred years head start on wisdom gathering after all ;)
Do ya know I didn't even register the part about Scooch? I think I've actually started to selectively filter things about them out lol. Awesome!
[Whether my attempt at Yoda-speak or yours or Kerri's is the closest is neither here nor there, the fact is neither of you disagreed that he talks funny-backwards (and you both had a go at mocking his speech too...tsk!), and therefore the comparison with Maroon 5 is valid, and therefore I wasn't picking on him, and therefore you two were picking on ME and what's more...I WIN! - Fraser]
We weren't mocking Yoda, just trying to understand his wisdom! And Maroon5's album title is a different kind of different than Yoda's. It's slightly more nonsensical.
Either way, you're right about us picking on you :) And do ya know what?! It's FUN! :P
[OMG! It's like the night outside Rokemarsh Youth Club all over again. My septum is still twisted, y'know... - Fraser]
you pick on us all the time, now its our turn! :P
...and im starting to understand the title of the album...with my revsion theres so much that i keep thinking each page gets me nearer to near the end, which almost is the end, so perhaps i do get it. it gives me a bit more motivation to turn the page put it that way, as each page i turn its neaer to the last page, but its still confusing and seemingly gramatically wrong on first glance nevertheless.
Isn't revision fun? :P I can't even motivate myself to open the book right now.. wanna go outside into the suuun! Only problem is I do no work when I'm outside :P
try as geograhy, theres sooo much of it! its like doing 2 separate subjects, for physical alone i have more than some other whole subjects bohoo....aww, i really want to do well, the fear of failure is the only thing making me work
dontcha just hate fear of failure? Geog sounds harsh anyways, good luck with that one! I'm sure you'll do great though. The thing with exams is they always seem like they're going to be harder than they are! (except when you go in and NOTHING ON THE PAPER MAKES SENSE... ARRRGHHHH!!) That's always unfun :P
i was sooo annoyed in my general studies exam today, a whole section was on global warming etc...EASY! at the start i skimmed through the qs. one was like what can be done to reduce emissions. so i did the qs, getting towards the end realised there were 2 12 marks qs n i was running out of time so i gave myself time restrictions. when i finished i had longer left than expected so i as adding stuff to my answers. with about 1 min left i realised i had missed the emisions one! im such an idiot, i dunno how i did it! it was worth 9 marks meh. i just really quickly wrote all i could. i was sooo frustated but at the end of the day all the courses iv looked at so far at unis dont even accept it as an a-level so if i fail it doesnt really matter...:S