Madonna - 'Miles Away'
Ah! Now that we know what was really going on in the Ritchie household while 'Hard Candy' was being recorded, this song starts to make a lot more sense. It's not a fiction where the narrator notices that she tends to get on better with her boyf (or girlf, Madge is quite the Katy Perry fan after all) when they are a long way away from each other, it's an autobiographical account of why Madonna's marriage was DOOMED.
DOOMED, I TELL YOU!
(The thing I love about this video - filmed at Radio 1's Big Weekend back in the summer - is that opening line "this next song is for anybody who is afraid to fall in love". And I love it because the only sane response, should you ever wake up one morning and find that you have somehow become in love with Madonna (and I mean properly, reciprocally in love, not just infatuation) is to be utterly TERRIFIED.
I mean there's high maintenance, there's making a life-sized replica of the Eiffel Tower entirely out of cream crackers in the rain, there's trying to hold red hot pig iron in your hands without spilling it, and then there's Madonna.)
Meanwhile, it seems the inspiration bank in Madonna's melody store doesn't hold a lot of information at any one time. What else could explain the blatant recycling of the bridge melody to 'Give It 2 Me' in the verses here? It's not like she's shown herself to be thrifty in any other areas of her life, is it?
Also, listening to Madonna songs can be a good argument for the de-learning of the English language, and extensive re-training in something useful like, say, mandarin, as she's not the most gifted lyricist ever.
Even in the middle of Christmas shopping, the "get stupid, get stupid" section of 'Give It 2 Me' cuts through like lemon juice in a paper-cut, and is every bit as painful.
Sadly the verses here are more evidence for the prosecution. But the good news is, the chorus makes up for it.
Here, the lyrics make sense and don't make you wince. Those gentle waves of harmony actually suit her voice, as does the five-year-old Justin Timberlake 'Like I Love You' backwash of sampled strumming over super-basic beats. And it has a melody which goes somewhere, rather than round and round in a tight fist of very few notes.
Best of all, the song has a sentiment you can really relate to. I mean, I also tend to like Madonna a lot more when she's a long way away from me. It's like she read my mind...
Download: Out now
CD Released: November 24th
(Fraser McAlpine)
PS: You do know that's pure Gaviscon in that champers bottle, don't you? She must've been having a really (really) subtle dig at Guy there - heartburn, geddit? - and we didn't even spot it! Genius.
Comment number 1.
At 24th Nov 2008, shaunikennedy wrote:Does anyone agree that perhaps Madonna's just a bit too old for this now? She's like too wrinkly. It's minging. She was good, and stil is at singing. But she's now outdone by all the new younger bands etc. x
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Comment number 2.
At 24th Nov 2008, DanielleAmyx wrote:i havent actually listened to the song, but thats simply becuase her last couple of songs have been so CRAP, i mean how is she still singing. ill agree shes had some good songs but she should let it go, she just doesnt look the part anymore.
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Comment number 3.
At 27th Nov 2008, clairelovestakethat wrote:Madonna really annoys me. she totally has to give up! she is just a really old reppals ( read the word backwards hahahahah). i mean some of her songs are gd but i could easily live without them .. and her!!! x
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Comment number 4.
At 30th Nov 2008, TooKeaneToLeave08 wrote:Loving your ageist attitudes... so by all accounts Paul McCartney & Tom Jones should be dead by now!!! In fact, why weren't they assassinated 15 years ago???!!!
Shaunikennedy... I'll bet you look you like a stunner when you're 50 as well!!!!
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