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Rage Against The Machine

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Fraser McAlpine | 16:45 UK time, Friday, 12 December 2008

A Brit AwardThe idea of giving people pre-emptive BRIT Awards is still a very controversial one, and not really something that works. I mean you don't get referees who call the results of a football match before it has been played, you don't get literary prizes handed out based on which author a panel believes will come up with an amazing novel (given sufficient time, inspiration and a really clever thesaurus), and you don't give a tip in a restaurant based on the idea that when your food finally arrives, you know KNOW you're going to love it.

And yet, last year Adele won the first Critics' Choice BRIT Award, and you can't really deny that it set her up for a pretty good year. She hadn't released a single properly at the time the award was announced, but it's not as if the panel were WRONG about her. It's more that when she picks up awards that she has actually earned at the 2009 awards, it'll be strange, as she's already got one. Wouldn't that devalue the first one a bit?

[This is what we said at the time, after the review...]

Anyway, this year's Critics' Choice Award winner has just been announced, and it's Florence & The Machine. Which is good because I like them, but still seems odd, because they haven't really done anything worth a BRIT Award yet. I'm sure they WILL, But who can really tell?

Anyway, here's Florence's response to her new-found acclaim: "Blimey, a BRIT Award. Thank you so much to the critics. I'm making my album at the moment, it's sort of sounding like a choir, a harp, some metal chains and a piano all put through a car crusher, then hit with wooden planks really hard. I will see you at the awards. I'll be the one trying to get off with Katy Perry and passed out next to Leona Lewis."

Hey, move over, Flo. That was MY position!

PS: Yeah, she said a harp and NOT a ukulele. Dammit!

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