So I woke up this morning to my alarm clock radio and....
the lovely SARAH KENNEDY doing her bit for the BEEB right here on ´óÏó´«Ã½ RADIO 2.
I think Sarah's show is cracking, it's just what you need at that time in the morning, she does all the work for you whilst you just lie there contemplating how the day might pan out and how best to kick it off.
This morning, however during her paper review, i nearly fell out of bed...
SARAH: "...And there's a bit here about BILLIE PIPER and CHRIS EVANS getting divorced today so CHRIS can marry his lady golfer... "
Can you imagine being in your own bed with your own early morning fuzzy thoughts and then hearing that about yourself, I mean even if it were true and frankly I have no idea if it is, I'm sure I'll be the last to know, it's still a bit of a shocker... It was hilarious.
Yesterday at my restaurant some stupid journalist tried to pretend that they'd been invited to my wedding but they'd not yet been told where it was ! They asked the manageress, a good friend of mine, if she had any idea as to the location. Of course she denied all knowledge. She told me last night, we were laughing our heads off.
Most journalists are lazy, misguided, stupid and deeply unimmaginative, which is ironic seeing as they spend most of their time making things up. La la la, life's such a funbus.
Still, it's better to be talked about than not, at least when you're in my game anyhow.
Lots of love,
CLP 2007
X.
I talked to Billie today, i saw her two days ago and am seeing her again on saturday and we are both happy and ready to move on, she's cool, i'm cool, it's cool.
Also just for the record, the girl on the sofa says hello..
Comments
Hi girl on the sofa, you seem to be making Chris a very happy boy, so well done,
I agree about journalists, they seem to be immoral a lot of the time, especially the showbiz ones, they seem to think anyone in the public eye is fair game. I don't particularly need to know anything about your life unless you choose to reveal it via your show or your blog. You make me smile with your fun-loving outlook on life and that's good enough for me.
Em xx
Dear Chris et al
I'm really glad I don't have to have that amount of attention heaped on me. I think you (and Ms Billie) deal with it all gracefully. Good on you.
Didn't have time to blog on yesterday's but it was an excellent one with many thoughtful responses - especially Bingo's... Hopefully the sea-change will occur and we will live in a better place.
Jx
PS Please stop buying palm oil stuff (ecover included) because the palm tree plantations in the far east, esp Sri Lanka, are wiping out the habitat of the Orang Utang quicker than you can say 'good intentions'.
PPS My mother's an angel. She went into a book shop and asked for a book called 'Between the Sheets with Angelica'. She tells me it is a craft book where you iron a substance called Angelica between baking parchment. However, the bookshop she'd gone into was a religious bookshop and they weren't too happy with her!
Good news that you're both "cool". It makes life much easier when you can stay in tune through a break up. Oh, and it drives the tabloids nuts when there's no "hate story" - that alone's got to be worth making the effort. Just a shame it didn't work longer term.
I'm a part time single parent and I've just had a lovely few days with my lad before he went back to his mum for the rest of half term. So I have to ask - the girl on the sofa wasn't Jade, was it? I know she's a bit old for school half term, but parenting is "cool" in my eyes right now...
Chris,
You are such a sweetheart to share this with us! I know men HATE being called a sweetheart, but I'm afraid that's what you are!
I am really glad that you and Billie are o.k. and ready to move on. I can only wish you both the very best for the future, wherever that leads you. And I would like to say hello back to the girl on the sofa!
I was having a fairly difficult day, just about to leave the office and I am so glad I read your blog before going home - sometimes I don't get the chance.
I'm really happy now!
C xx
I'm a young lady golfer - will you marry me? In fact I won a big tie yesterday against a male colleague so I've been walking on air today. Match went to the 19th hole. He was 4 up at the turn but i played a blinder on the back nine. Can there be anything better than an afternoon by the Scottish seaside, golfing in the sunshine?
are you sure you aren't getting married Chris? I was thinking I could be bridesmaid agian.
I was sitting in Waitrose Coffee shop a little while ago and I read about your 'wedding' as well, I nearly fell off my chair!
AHHHHH girl on the sofa, haven't heard about her for a while, are you marrying her instead?!
C L PIE
cool is good...
Hello G o t Sofa...
Good luck & good vibes to you all...
D x
Mr E
Yep, I guess the great Oscar was right.
The other quote that I love is
''Life is what happens while you are busy making other plans''
Oscar again? Nope. John Lennon.
How true though, we often get so wrapped up in our plans for the next job, the next house, world domination, you know, normal everyday stuff, that we lose sight of what we are doing right now. Experiencing the most precious of gifts.
Jeez. What a day. It was one those 'if it can go wrong, it will' jobs. Missed most of the show as a result.
Still, only six working days 'till Road Trip! Did I mention......
I'll pop in my ARF request, have a swift glass of Californian (did I mention....) merlot and have a bash at getting some sleep. Thank you for your comments and support, I am hoping that the holiday (did I mention....) will de-stress me completely, but if things persist I will go and see the doc.
Much peace and love all
MfR
PS Keats and Yeats are on your side.
PPS Wilde is on mine.
PPPS Entertaining Mr Sloane
PPPPS Gingembre. Mostly nonsense, sprinklings of modern culture that mean something to me for some reason. Possibly.
Hi all - Christoff, I think it's brilliant that you and Billie keep in touch but are also getting on with your own lives. It's very refreshing to hear of two people who, for whatever reasons, are no longer a couple, but are not bitching and back stabbing about each other. I parted company with my ex husband 8 years ago, and we have 2 incredibly gorgeous boys. Throughout the whole "breaking up" thing, we have both maintained our dignity and never ever put each other down in front of the boys. Now we get on well, and the boys are very balanced, adorable young men. So, it can be done, and you've done it with dignity, so well done you.
Hi girl on the sofa - welcome to the blog.
Love you Christoff,
Catbird xxx
Hi Chris,
Well, I guess, if everyone is cool, then you can't do much better...at least you'll be happy that ye met and mattered and still do today, just in a different way.
I have my own girl on the sofa right now! Mrs Tickle...who is feeling a bit poorly is resting there as we speak...poor thing. Still, we have Saturday to look forward to as we'll be marking 5 months of married life....doesn't get much better for me there!
So for now, back to life and loving it - as the old Irish phrase goes - "May you be in heaven, half an hour before the devil knows you're dead!!"
Tickle :)
Love the show.
Radio 2 in the afternoon fabulous.
Divorce is a bit scary unless it's amicable like I don't fancy living in the bed sit above a curry house, tempting though ...
May each day in your life be a good day one and all.
May you make friends with each one you meet.
What about that Paul McCartney video then... Postman patish but very good.
chris you and colin monty would make a lovly couple ......thats golf couple by the way ...laughter all the way
Its difficult if not impossible for one person to meet all of your needs for all of your life. I think it was fine when we lived in stone age communities and life moved at a snails pace. Now we fly faster than the speed of sound (well, we did till the safety muppets grounded it) its kind of only natural that you pick up with someone, enjoy the best moments however brief, then move on. I have no idea what it must be like to be Chris Evans but It can only be ten times as pressurized as it is for the rest of us. That makes it even more admirable that Chris and Billie have protected their privacy and given the sewer press no opportunity to create their mischief. Just my two penneth, for what its worth
JK Nonegreen
Today's the day folks - I'm going to the new Wembley and I'm very excited about it too.
Journo's - well we all know what they're like, the only things about the paper that are of any use are the sports sections and the fact you get fish n chips inside them!!! I was a photographer in a previous life and some of the requests I had to 'papp' people were outrageous - and in sleepy Norfolk too???
I wouldn't say I've copied you CLP - my divorce was messy to start with but you have shown that it can be done with dignity (esp in the public eye) - but I have taken the way you and Billie have conducted yourselves as the way to behave.
HL - you're spot on, ex or not it's the hardest thing I've ever faced, I'm a tad on the outside now but we do have a daughter together - I'm dreading 'the' phone call. Could be this year!
Have a great weekend all of you
Check out Tina's page, it's great.
KWx
Hello Chris,
Bloody Journalists! The curse of modern life. Their job is to present the FACTS and we'll decide for ourselves what to make of it all. I don't want their twisted views or even their speculations, frankly who gives a damn what they think anyway? "Just gimme the facts ma'am" as Joe would say. and let me excersize my own grey matter. Have a good day one and all, journalists not withstanding, and look forward to a beautiful weekend, HURRAH! David.
Chris
Don't just dismiss marriage to Monty out of hand - there are worse I am sure!!!!!!!!!
Amicable divorce what a nice idea. Not too good at it myself..not that there is any animosity just find that extra level of friendship and support a step too far.
Well, I'd knocked orf before I saw this last evening, so am just catching up today...
So, Christophe, good morning, and happy ARF to you!
I saw this bit in the DM yesterday whilst scanning the trashier bits of the net, and indeed did comment sur le blogge. Wot a pavlova eh, and it appears to be 'silly season' in the press already and it ain't even summer yet!
But this morning I was in bed with my own fuzzy thoughts having partaken of a tad too much of the fermented grape last evening, and was awoken by all four paws of my boy cat landing upon my chest. Not quite as alarming as hearing my name on the radio, but it frightened the living bejeezus out of me!
Anyhoo, would an egg timer be a suitable gift? Either that or a nice tin opener.
If you could let me know where you're registered
love
hazel
x
ps hello to the girl on the sofa, and to the lovely Billie too x
Chris,
Just been catching up with your blogs - I have been absent for a few days. Inspirational words from you, as always.
Thank you.
Gingembre - enjoy tonight - please give a cheer (for me) to our Nickey Shorey if he gets a game : ) If he does, he will be the first Reading player to play for England for 100 years!!!!
MfR - really empathise with the (lack of ) sleep thing....have a fantastic trip
Mange tout
Gaby
x
Hello Christophe
I think it is soo cool how cool you and Billie are :o) xx
Hi to the girl on the sofa :o) xx
Hi to Billie and lots of love, luck and happiness in your new home :o) xx
Happy ARF!
Have a great weekend all
Mary xx
ps. MfR - fingers crossed for ARf!
Morning Shloggers. Just a very quickie to say Greetings from an unfeasibly fantastic and sunny Dublin, where it's bank holiday weekend AGAIN, hurrah yippee! Life is indeed sweet for a little aul eejit like meself so if any of yous is feelin' miserable, swot up on Father Ted and get yourself on Ryanair to God's own country, where it might be illegal to smoke but it's also against all Civil Law to be pissed off.
Anyway..ChrissieS...rumbled. Yes that's me. I really should get a life shouldn't I.
Or maybe not. And if there is a grain of truth in what I'm readin' in the papers over here then Congratulations Christoffe Lambie Pie. But I suspect there isn't, in which case still Congratulations Christoffe Lambie Pie for being a Top Bloke and possibly clinically insane.
Bless you, mummy's brave little soldier.
Must go, there's a kerfuffle outside and I can't wait to join in.
Clodagh.x
Hey Hey You You.....
I would probably quite like your girlfriend.
I still don't have an aerial.
Maybe you could play a request for me anyway, and I will tune in laterally with my own air waves.
have a great weekend. I'm having a weekend ex-familie, they are all doing Scouty things. I'm staying home and eating.
dwnb
Hello all - happy ARF!
In the same way I don't shop in Tosco's now (ethics, organics and the way most supermarkets are wiping the individuals off the face of the earth) I don't read the Red Tops, don't buy hello or OK and can't be bothered with gossip columns.
Each person on this planet has the right to privacy. We all make mistakes and fools of ourselves. Most of us, thank goodness, don't have to read about it the next day in the paper. Treat each person as you find them. He who sows the wind, will reap a whirlwind.....
Anyway, nuff of this...away to Exeter for 80th birthday party for my lovely Dad and meet up with the family -
Here's wishing each and everyone of you a peaceful and safe weekend.
GotS, CLP, BP - you're doing good. Stay that way.
BB
I don't buy newspapers anymore for the fact that i don't believe a word they write.
How sad it is that we are so intrested in celebs lives while we probably ignore what is happening on our own doorsteps.
When i am PM i will ban OK, Hello and Big Brother. And tell people who miss em to get a life.
Chris, Chris, Chris - I told you that on Wednesday, were you not checking your blog??? Could have saved you an early morning shock!!!
Lovely that you and Billie are so cool.
Hello Girl on Sofa. Is Chris on Sofa too???? Is it a big sofa???????
Loved Women's minute last night - made me chuckle when you kept talking about stripy things during the intro to the next song.
By the way, - love the new Ray la Montagne song - but if you play Riverman by Nick Drake - it's got the same lovely cello bits in it. Not complaining, Ray's done it brilliantly as well!!
Have great weekends all.
xxxxxxxxx
Andy and Bodminbabe - couldn't agree more! Don't shop at supermarkets, don't read tabloid junk, don't watch reality TV (Stephen Fry was absolutely right recently) and recycle/reuse whenever possible. Is it enough - are there enough of us doing it - do we have enough time left? Gets very heavy if you think about it all too much and so it's light relief to just enjoy the moment and being here and now and, of course, looking ahead to arf!
Le bon weekend to all
Jx
Hazel, not sure about the egg timer idea. CLP likes to take his cooking slow and steady, so I've heard, can't imagine him wanting to be rushed by an egg timer.
hmmmm, how about a nice teapot? That would give them a chance to sit and ponder whilst the tea is brewing ...
Clodaph, what's going on out there??
Gingembre - have a fab night tonight. PLEASE LET US AT LEAST SCORE?!!! And am sending positive vibes to you and yours - can't imagine what a difficult situation it must be for all 3 of you.
xxxx
Thanks Tinsel. I was wondering myself. A lovely big Brown Betty tea pot with a bit of a dribbly spout.
OR
One of those blue and white plastice tea dispensers that you afix to the kitchen wall, and each time you press the button, it chucks out EXACTLY a teaspoon's worth of tea.
Who needs messy caddies after all...
love
hazel
x
ps I only thought of the golf connection after I'd typed it, so I decided to leave it in. Purely for my own delectation and delight!
sometimes I just gotta...
Gingembre - are you a lollipop man?
well hello all,
its been a while since i last caught up with you. My travels round NZ were great and I have learn't, well sort of, to play golf.
Glad to see you are all blogging along as usual and sounds like his lordship must have made some good progress with the girl on the sofa! good skills!
anyway must dash I am doing battle with strange red beetles which appear to be eating my roses! - any beetle repelling tips would be greatly appreciated.
Love Jennie (from the blog)
Yo Christoff & ALLL Blog Dudes,
Bingo Star ere.
I was half way through writing a blog comment before and it suddenly disapeared, don't know if I hit a wrong key on the old keyboard of happiness, aye and I ain't talkin' Roland keyboard, although that does bring much happiness with the old 'riffs'. What I'm talkin' is Compaq keyboards.
Anyway me blog ain't appeared 'ere 'alf finished so i'll try again.
Just commenting on Chris & Billie. I don't like talkin' about Chris's private life or indeed any celebrities private lives as I think it's rude and celebrities should be allowed a private life that iz private- know what am sayin'!!!!
But a slight exeption today as Christoff you have mentioned Billie so I take it as ok today to comment abit on the subject. It's a line i'd never normally cross - know what am sayin' Christoff!!
I wish yourself, Chris and Billie all of the best in the future. It's very sad when a relationship comes to an end but atleast you both have kept it amicable. It makes an already difficult situation alot easier to sort out than couples who get nasty in the courts.
I myself recently came out of a long term relationship and tryed my best to keep it as pleasant as can be. Unfortunately sometimes a relationship just seems to run it's course and come to an end.
I'm very happy that both of you are doing very well in your careers and I wish you both well for the future in all areas of your lives.
As for the press they really do disgust me, the way they hound celebrities.
Laws in this country should be tightened to stop what is basically stalking of celebrities by photographers. Celebs should be allowed a private life!!!
That's why I don't buy daily papers as there full of rubbish in my opinion.
Also that's one of the main reasons why I myself don't push my music ideas too much. I'm not saying i've got any talent as a musician. (that would be egotistical and I don't want to sound like that) But what i'm trying to say is say if say you did become famous at something like music, I personally would hate having photographers following me around.
Yeah it would be great having your work liked and bringing lots of happiness to alot of people and getting very well paid at the same time (although not in all cases) but I don't think I could handle the press.
Anyway Christoff and Billie I won't be reading any lies or rubbish about you both in the papers.
JUST TO SAY I WISH YOU BOTH ALL OF THE BEST FOR THE FUTURE!!!
From Bingo the demented Star. (that's one 'r' star..... err yes)
Chow!!!!
PS Sorry about another serious Bingo Blog terday but i've got some crayzee jokes in me pipeline- might 'ave ter get a plumber out to unblock them!!!!!
I'll post them soon if Christoff doesn't ban me!!
hi chris , just aquick note to say love the show on a friday , it just get me in the moad for the weekend . i think you and billy are sound i wish most couples would do this when they spilt up, keep up the good work mate
many thanks tony mckenna
Chris, your a breath of fresh air and your behavior's are clearly rubbing off well on your nearest and dearest and hopefully extending outwards.
Your consistent upbeat approach to life and work and them being the same thing basically is spot on with me!
Please keep on walking that talk - loving every day / making the most of every part of what IT has to offer... As the saying goes "sometimes your the fly... sometimes your the windscreen" its always best to keep your chin up!
Hi
You make me laugh so much I live in USA now and use the listen again to hear the music and crack that you come up with on the radio.
I from Belfast and used to live in England and listened on my commute for years when I worked on Twiglets at Jacob's liverpool.
So I have just read your blog - I agree about sarah K she rocks and when I did my drive on a Monday morning she is really lovely listen about her peacocks etc.
Keep on Rocking Chris - your great
Back to the job of world domination on SPAM.
Marianne Pollock