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17:53 UK time, Thursday, 14 January 2010

I demand Wednesday's letters! You've ruined the lunch hour.
PS: Please respond to my demands.
Jo, London
Monitor note: Your wish is my command. A bumper crop today.

Re : Could I suggest removing the number of alcohol units from the label and refusing to serve anyone who can't multiply volume of fluid by percentage strength as obviously too drunk to be served?
Ed, Clacton, UK

is an offensive description of the police officer referred to as the shortest policeman in Britain. Would the journalist who wrote this like to be called "fat" if overweight, "scrawny" if thin or any other derogatory description?
John, Northampton, UK

Re: : "Ricci was a very smart missionary. He put China right at the centre of this new universe, this new globe, to underscore its importance." Of course China is at the centre of a Chinese map. "China" in Chinese means "Country at the centre". Ricci's head would probably have been lopped off if he didn't put China there.
Jan, London, UK

The ´óÏó´«Ã½ has admitted to . On that page are links to stories about "U2 tour hottest US ticket"; "U2 to headline Glastonbury"; four more U2 stories; and a link to "U2 at the ´óÏó´«Ã½", with lots of other stuff about, er, U2.
Good to see that the ´óÏó´«Ã½ has reacted so swiftly to criticism...
John Whapshott, Westbury, England

The timing of the person walking across the road in the background towards is perfect.
Olly, London, UK

Judging from the picture in , it seems like they got quite a long way before they fell in.
Stuart, Sydney formerly Croydon

This morning I finally solved a mystery that had long puzzled me, namely the last verse of Good King Wenceslas: "In his master's steps he trod / Where the snow lay dinted / Heat was in the very sod / Which the saint had printed."
How on earth, I thought, could footsteps transfer significant amounts of heat? Now I know. On my way to work this morning, I walked across an almost pristine snowscape, which had just one set of footprints on it. Not wishing to spoil the beautiful scene, I walked in the footsteps, which had been made by someone with a longer stride than my own, so my walking pace naturally quickened. It is likely that the page boy was shorter than the king, so he would have experienced the same effect, and when you walk more quickly, you get warmer. Simples!
Adam, London, UK

Unashamed-exaggeration-for-a-cheap-pun-watch in . You say: "A Nuneaton engineer says he has been snowed under by orders for sledges built from car exhaust pipes." But he says: "I've had two orders from people stopping me to say: 'I love that - can I have one?'"
Tom Webb, Surbiton, UK

With reference to last week's Caption Competition (even though I know it's too late to formally enter) and to the current change in the weather, may I suggest "I thawt I thaw a thaw"?
Paul Greggor, London

Just to take issue with Rob (Tuesday letters). I find more relevance in Ron Jeremy lecturing on the internet, as it actually has an impact on his career/living, therefore he has a vested interest in it. Rainforest clearance however has no direct link on a certain patronising Irishman.
Owain Williams, Regensburg

Snowverload. Seriously, Paper Monitor?
Katherine, Canberra, Australia

Simon (Tuesday letters) may have a point; I clicked on hoping to read about new evidence in the England ball-tampering controversy.
Edward Green, London, UK


HB, London

Can you remind me how to post hyperlinks in my message? I have a witty comment to make but no clue how to link to the article... I bet by the time I find out someone will have already made the witty comment. Shucks.
Ellie, Oxford, UK

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