Mosaics and Toilet Seats
- 6 Aug 07, 10:32 AM
I had been admitted to the psychiatric ward on a voluntary basis in a very confused state. I was experiencing the classic symptoms of mania and psychosis 鈥 delusions (believing things that weren鈥檛 true i.e. a hot date with Matt Damon featured somewhere) and paranoia (I thought I was a secret agent and that the house alarm system was a set of TV cameras monitoring me 24/7 and I could trust no one).
In a psychiatric ward all control is taken away from you and you are at the mercy of the system. You have to take the medication as prescribed (two refusals and you鈥檙e put on a section), you are monitored at every turn (so if you weren鈥檛 paranoid when you were admitted you soon will be) and you have to negotiate with strangers in authority and other patients who may be disturbed. It is a very frightening experience, especially in a confused state.
I was frightened that I was going to be sectioned, frightened that I was going to be overmedicated with drugs that had nasty side effects and frightened that I would never get out of the place in time to return to my job.
I was desperate to get out of there, so I had to think quickly. How could I draw attention to my plight? The Cancer Care Charity shop on the hospital site proved to be the answer. It was a haven of miscellania stocking everything from pens to cuddly giraffes. In a flurry of manic delight, I bought some small yellow postit notes and rushed back to the ward, cradling my prize in my hot little hands.
It seems that Cancer Care Charities get more support and donations than mental health charities as I noticed that they had several friendly volunteers (used to psychiatric patients dressed in various forms of nightwear attire dropping in for breakfast) and a lovely garden containing roses and stone sculptures, but I digress 鈥︹.
Intent on my mission to escape, I proceeded to spend the whole morning creating a mosaic of small yellow postit notes all over the window of my room containing the messages 鈥Get me out of this hole鈥 and 鈥SOS鈥 in morse code in the hope that someone would see my masterpiece of abstract art in the window and come to my rescue 鈥︹.
Of course no one did, and later on I was asked to move to another bay. The health care assistant cleaned out my room for another patient, took the postits down and replaced them with a toilet seat (at least someone had a sense of humour).
Fortunately, I quickly got better and was discharged after six weeks, but while I was there, it felt like forever. The next time I may not be so lucky 鈥︹
The has spent years of campaigning on behalf of user groups and medical professionals to come up with a more humane mental,health system. Sadly, the UK Government (suffering from political paranoia and delusions) has refused to listen to the evidence and has instead widened the definition of a mental disorder for a Section and introduced draconian Supervised Community Treatment Orders in the new Mental Health Act 2007, to further stigmatise individuals, the majority of whom are absolutely no threat to anyone.
Get paranoid:
This could happen to anyone.
This could happen to you.
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Comments
I am now paranoid. Thank you.
But on the positive side, I love your writing here and am so glad you have been signed up by Ouch. I shall be checking out your own site, definitely.
brilliantly written, love the line about the govt suffering from paranoia and delusions. mebbe they should be locked up too.
That's the key, isn't it, Miss Bipolar Works - HUMANE. A humane mental health system. When I was taken into the mental health system rather against my will - though I needed to be treated - I felt like cattle, like I was being herded, just force-fed treatment and being given no explanations or even reassurance. The Mental Health Bill proposals are only going to make this worse.
What's stunning is that they don't realise how these faceless systems contribute to the problem instead of alleviating it.
Of course, no one has all the answers. But I have to believe that writing like yours is part of the solution.