大象传媒

I went to a concert last night at a cosy little venue not far from where I live. I like this venue because (in theory) even when it is full, there is still enough space to stand without getting extremely irritated by the large bloke jiggling around in front of me and waving his hands in the air obscuring my line of vision (why can they never dance properly?).

One of my companions was so annoyed she said 鈥淚t makes you want to cut their heads off with a machete doesn鈥檛 it?鈥� I didn鈥檛 comment. I reckon there should be a rule that all tall people should stand at the back and all small people should stand at the front. This would make for a much fairer concert experience.

I鈥檓 not really a fan of a standing only concert. I feel quite threatened if anybody touches me, steps on my toes or starts backing into me (even if it is completely innocent and accidental). I like to keep an invisible circle of space around me but this is obviously difficult to sustain, given that it is invisible and I am only 5 foot 3 inches. Unfortunately, this means that I find it difficult to relax and enjoy the show.

Another thing that I have difficulty with is the noise level. It can vary from band to band, but in general they like to keep it as loud as humanely possible, which is sometimes just a few decibels above my comfort zone.

But what really annoys me is the wolf whistling at the end of the show right down my earhole. I just don鈥檛 think these people understand the effect they are having on others nearby. I am sensitive to high pitched noise (I believe that this is a bipolar trait) and it upsets me so much that I have to put my fingers in my ears and it makes me want to cut my ear off.

And the flashing lights thrust upon the audience. Again, like a Gremlin, I'm acutely sensitive to bright light. Fortunately, I don't have epilepsy. Otherwise I'd be automatically excluded from all concerts.

You may ask why I bother to go at all, if I find it all such a negative experience?

The reason is this. There is nothing like the experience of seeing and hearing a live band perform right up close. They say and do things that you just don鈥檛 get on a recording. The venue that I went to last night was so small that at one point the artist concerned capitalised on this and left the stage to mingle amongst the crowd. You wouldn鈥檛 get that at a large venue.

But because I have bipolar disorder, I still have to think carefully before I decide on an evening out. A number of my favourite bands are playing at another venue in the city where I live in the near future. Only I haven鈥檛 bought any tickets, because the venue is just too large for me to feel comfortable on a standing room only basis.

Shame.

If you have a mental health condition, how do you cope at gigs and concerts?
Do you enjoy them or avoid them?

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