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Lesbian Vampire Killers - Corden and Horne (that's them, there) battle lady-loving bloodsuckers in rural Norfolk. How can I put this nicely? It's not Shaun Of The Dead. 2 stars.

Duplicity - double crossing and triple crossing in this ice-cool twisty turny tale of corporate theft. With Julia Roberts and Clive Owen. 4 stars

The Age Of Stupid - well meaning eco doc about what we can do to save the planet, ruined by an odd futuristic fictional bit with Pete Postlethwaite as a historian living in a tower in the sea off the coast of Norway. Yeah, I know... 3 stars

Paul Blart: Mall Cop - weirdly gentle and gag-free 'comedy' where Kevin James plays a lonley security guard, out to protect his shopping mall from robbers. Not bad, just bland. 2 stars