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I Didn’t Go Home

I was born in Dulwich, London on 8.1.1937 and was just 20 months old when war was declared.

With the outbreak of war my father, who was in the Territorial Army, was one of the first to be called up, and was posted to a camp in Harrietsham. At the time we lived in Brixton, and my mother decided to close our London home and rent a cottage in Harrietsham. The first cottage we lived in belonged to a Mr & Mrs Tong, with whom we became friends.
My father was sent to France, and upon his return from Dunkirk, was posted to Bridge of Allan, Scotland. We also went to Scotland for a short time, returning to Harrietsham when my father was sent abroard. By that time our family had grown — two elder sisters, me, a younger sister and a baby brother. By December 1941, my mother thought it was time to return home to London, but because of the bombing polans were already afoot to evacuate children, Mr and Mrs Tong had been told they would have to take an evacuee.
On 9th December 1941, at four years old, I made a decision which shaped my life. I was given a choice — I could either stay with ‘Nanny’ Tong — or go home to London with my mother, but whatever I chose to do, I could not change my mind. That was the ultimatum and I can remember it as if it were yesterday. I chose to stay with Nanny Tong, even though I was at such a young age it was a very wise decision.
My two elder sisters were sent to live with an elderly couple at Langley, but they were very unhappy and returned to London after a few weeks.
Mother used to come and see me occasionally, and I went to London during school holidays. I can only remember seeing my father on two or three occasions during the entire war. He was in the Royal Artillery, which was one of the most traveled units in the British Army.

At the end of the war there were no immediate plans for me to go home. In August 1946 mother presented us with a baby brother, and two months later she died. Father not long home from the war, was left with six children, aged between 2 months to 15 years. Father took himself, my two elder sisters and baby brother to live with a widowed aunt and her four children. My other brother went to live with another aunt. I was going to be taken away and put in a home wioth my younger sister. Nanny Tong assured me that she would never let me go, she would always come to find me. She3 had a letter (which I still have) from my mother to say that she would ‘leave her with you as long as you wanted her’. In the end, father decided to let my sister be adopted by a family friend. She had an unhappy childhood and, when grown up, returned to London and became part of our family again.

I stayed with Nanny Tong until I married in 1958, but always kept in contact with my father, aunts, uncles and of course my sisters and brothers. My father married again in 1952 (my stepmother was wonderful) and the family increased — 2 half-sisters and a half-brother.
I do sometimes wonder where I would be now and how my life would have been if I had decided to go home to London with mother in 1941. What I do know, in my heart of hearts is that I made the right decision. Nanny Tong and her family gave me love and affection, a good home, a good education and was just a wonderful person.
I have had a good life, with the best husband in the world, two wonderful sons and daughters-in-law and four gorgeous grandchildren. My husband worked at Leeds Castle for 42 years, so I have been seen and been part of a way of life that not many experience. I have met many interesting people even going to Buckingham Palace on three separate occasions.
It is said that everyone has a guardian angel, and mine was certainly watching over me on 9th December, 1941.

This story was submitted to the People’s War site by Alison McNaught, and has been added to the website on behalf of Iris Bristow, with her permission and they fully understand the site’s terms and conditions.

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