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This story was submitted to the People's War site by Simon Harris and has been added to the website on behalf of Valerie Barnes with her permission and they fully understand the site's terms and conditions.

I was only three years old when the war started and lived with my family at Cherry Garden Lane in Folkestone. My brother Raymond worked for the electricity company at the time but knowing that he would get called up he enlisted in the Royal Navy.

The first and last time I Raymond in his navy uniform was at Christmas 1940 when he was home on leave. He made a very impressive sight for a four year old! On 1st March 1943 my brother’s ship hit and sunk on the Java Sea. My family was sent an awful telegram saying that he was ‘missing presumed dead.’ Some months later another telegram arrived to tell us that Raymond was in fact alive and living in a Japanese prisoner of war camp. We had no way of knowing what conditions were like in these camps and this gave us renewed hope. There was no more news until March 1945 when a further telegram arrived to tell us that Raymond had died. Now aged nine I screamed ‘blue murder’ when I heard the news and I was scared to sleep at nights. My other brother kept it all inside and my mother convinced herself that the telegram must be wrong and Raymond was still alive. There was no counselling available for anyone. A little while after the war Dick Best, a fellow of my brother’s on HMS Exeter and in the camp came to Folkestone to find Raymond’s family. He remained in contact with the family until he died in 1992 and I still have contact with his wife.

As a child I was asked whether I felt any animosity towards the Japanese because of my brother’s death. At the time my innocence led me to assert that I was not aware that any animosity should be felt or a grudge borne. However when, after mother’s death, Dick told me how Raymond had died horribly at the hands of his captors, my feelings welled up. I have a strong Christian faith however and through prayer and reconciliation I was able to forgive and move on.

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