大象传媒

It was early May 1943, and Cap Bon, the most north-easterly peninsula in Tunisia was our target. Tunis had been taken by the 8th. Army and Bizerta by the American II Corps. The campaign was coming to an end. Our signal squadron was in open laager in a large grassy field overlooked by a hill - a pleasant situation. I had "taken a spade for a walk" along with the customary three message forms. (What did the poor bloody infantry do without this vital material?)During the ensuing operation in the long grass I was appalled to hear mortar bombs exploding - within the laager! Seconds later (indelicate details omitted) I was up and away towards the relative safety of our large armoured vehicle. Its visor opened just long enough for our driver Jock to shout, "Get the stuff in the bonnet, Sandy," and shut again. My fellow operators had left cooker, mess tins and eating irons on the ground while they beat an ignominious retreat inside. I scooped them all up, rammed them into the false bonnet, and flung myself into the door of the now moving bus.

The mortaring continued, with a nice distribution of shots all over the field - and a number of hits. Every vehicle was now in motion, and most were making for the gate by which they had entered. Jock foresaw that that would be the next target, and made straight for the wall, broke through, and accelerated up the road, treating the big command vehicle like the fire engine he had driven before the war.The false bonnet and all the salvaged gear were mangled and crushed.

There is what might be called a tailpiece to this episode. The mortaring had come from the top of the aforementioned hill, where a detachment of Panzer Grenadiers were making a last stand in as deadly way as they could. When they in their turn were subjected to a selection of high explosives, the white flag appeared, and they came quietly down the hill. Their officer was a quintessential Nazi: blond, blue-eyed and extremely offensive - in Oxford English. His noncooperative behaviour was brought to an abrupt halt by two Lancers tank crew, who took his trousers down and spanked his bottom with a plank of wood, in full view of his own men. To his blond hair and blue eyes were now added red cheeks - four in all - and he gave no further trouble. I bet he doesn't mention that in his memoirs.

It was all over by May 12th.,a particularly delicious Tunisian date. There were suddenly captured vehicles by the thousand and prisoners by the tens of thousands. It was a major problem to know what to do with them all. The British Supremo, General Alexander, signalled to Churchill, "Sir, it is my duty to report that the Tunisian campaign is over. All enemy resistance has ceased. We are the masters of the North African shore."

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