大象传媒

The von-Thadden family in Pomerania (Part six)

Under the Russians continued -
鈥淚 was told to make banners on red pieces of material. I was given Russian words to copy; I remember one sentence meaning, 鈥楤ring large horses to the front!鈥� and one banner was cut from one of my mother鈥檚 silk eiderdown covers. We made quite a number of these banners, but the prize one was a big painting I had to do. I was given a very small picture to copy and then to enlarge it. I painted a huge horse with a victorious soldier on the top and then carefully painted the details of his uniform. I was rather pleased with the colourful result. A soldier came to look, fetched some of his comrades and they all burst out laughing, pointing to the horseman and shouting, 鈥楩ritz鈥� Fritz!鈥� 鈥� the name the Russians had for German soldiers! I had not realised that I had given my horseman such a Germanic looking face. I quickly altered his features by giving him smaller eyes and higher cheekbones and in the end they were satisfied with their Russian hero. Before we had to go back to work with the others, the soldiers invited both of us to give us some green tea and food, and I was able to hide some doughnuts in my pocket for my mother. I noted in my diary that we had difficulties to get away because the soldiers were drunk again.鈥�

鈥淭he Russians seemed to anticipate something or somebody of importance, they kept shouting at us to work faster. We gathered that high officers or even a general were expected to come. Vets came to inject the horses. Our banners and paintings were fixed to the stable and barn doors and they hung from newly erected portals, which were decorated with fir garlands. I noted in my diary 鈥榠t all looks like a circus鈥�!鈥�

鈥淎t all times the soldiers eyed the women and girls at work and in the evenings they went around to look for them. Nobody was safe except myself, thanks to my mother鈥檚 constant vigilance and thanks to the fact that I was now very thin and haggard and obviously not the sort of chubby, round girl they preferred. 鈥楰omm Frau!鈥� was the shouted demand with which the soldiers forced the women to go with them. Every day soldiers came to look for things, not only in our house, but in all the houses in the village. Our people were poor and when their carefully woven linen, the socks made from their own wool and their pots and pans were stolen and they were left with hardly anything, the women were so upset. They kept trying to hide things or to bury them but the soldiers had an uncanny ability to find hidden things. It did not take them long to discover several large trunks in our attic which had been sent to us by friends from Berlin and Hanover. There they stood, locked and safe from the bombs, only to be ripped open now and the clothes, linen and all sorts of other valuable belongings were strewn all over the attic floors. There I found some wonderful books, among them some that had been forbidden by the Nazis. For the first time I read 鈥業m Westen nichts Neues鈥� (All quiet on the Western Front鈥� and 鈥楪one with the Wind鈥�) 鈥� how I empathised with Scarlett in her chaotic war. Now all the things were lying about in muddled heaps.鈥�

鈥淎fter the great 鈥榠nspection鈥� the Russians began to pack up. For some reason they cut the leather off the two big armchairs in the hall which I thought was just wanton destruction. They rolled the pieces up and took them away. Then they were told to be ready next morning, April 12th, to 鈥榞o to the horses鈥�. My mother pleaded with the commandant to leave me at home, but he assured her that we would all be back 鈥榠n three days鈥� and that we would be guarded all the time so that nothing would happen to us. Early next morning, I joined the others carrying a small bundle on my back and wearing my father鈥檚 very comfortable soft black leather boots. When I said goodbye to my mother I said: 鈥業鈥檒l be back in three days, don鈥檛 worry!鈥� There were old men young boys, women and girls who were given four horses each, the four horses were tied to each other.鈥�

鈥淲e walked off in a long procession, followed by wagons with hay and corn. At first we walked along familiar lanes, through Cardemin and then to the south along roads that I did not know. It was a lovely, sunny, clear day, the birds were singing and the trees, still bare, seemed to feel the coming spring. We stopped in a wood to rest. There must have been at least 60 of us, and many soldiers. A Ukrainian man from the Wisbu trek came to talk to me. He said in a low voice that he had understood the Russians saying that we were going to take the horses all the way to Russia. His German was not good but I understood something about 鈥榞o back鈥� and I thought that he would come too. I had misunderstood what he had said earlier, he was not going to come back with me. Now I had to think what would I do? The man had said something about 鈥榙ark鈥� and 鈥榥ight鈥�. I had to be in Vahnerow in three days - that much was clear. I took great care to note where we were and realised that we were not far from Naugard when we finally stopped at Bernhagen, a completely deserted village some 6 miles south of Naugard. We had walked at least 20 miles on that day. We now had to take the horses to a pond and then lead them to empty barns for the night, where soldiers were waiting to tie them up. We were told to get hay from another barn, which was filled, to the rafters with hay. I was first back from the pond and I handed my horses to the soldier at the stable. I was well ahead of all the other people and horses and when I entered the barn I though this was my chance. I clambered quickly to the top of the hay crawled as far as possible away from the entrance and hid in the far corner. I fervently hoped that there would be enough hay for all the horses near the door! After a seemingly endless time all went quiet. The men had gone to another house with the women for the night, I had heard them talk about it and feared for the women. I hardly dared to breathe in my hiding place; the hay seemed to rustle with every breath I took. As darkness fell, patrolling soldiers would come to the barn, talking and smoking, walking away again. I was afraid that they could hear my pounding heart.鈥�

鈥淭he sun rose early, the people were woken up, there were shouts, and the horses came out, hooves clattered on the cobbles in the yard. Were they missing me? What would happen to my four horses? More shouting, more voices they had gone. I waited for a long time after all had gone quiet before I dared to come out. I thought I would avoid the lanes and roads we had come along yesterday but take my bearings from the sun and just walk north. There were plenty of woods and forests not too far from the road. I thought I could get home by the third day, even if I walked slowly and with detours. I sat in a light wood to rest for a bit when I heard a click of a gun nearby and in error I shouted 鈥榙on鈥檛 shot!鈥� and looked around to see where the Russians could be 鈥� only to see a squirrel making clicking noises on a branch behind me. I wept with relief.鈥�

鈥淚 walked all day, until late in the afternoon I saw two men who were just as scared to see me as I was to see them. One of them said, 鈥榯hat鈥檚 the daughter of the house!鈥� They were two elderly men from Wisbu from the trek that camped in our house and who had been driving one of the hay wagons. They had escaped late last night and had walked all night while I had been sitting in the hay. I was so pleased to have caught up with them and felt very relieved that I now had company. We stopped in a wood and took it in turns to sleep and watch. It was still quite cold at night. We spent the next night in a barn because it was frosty and started off again at sunrise. We decided to go faster, this was the third day after we had left home. From a hiding place near a main road we saw a long column of tanks and armoured cars with banners flying and 鈥楤erlin鈥� in large letters written on the side of the vehicles. We met no people on our way through the woods and across fields and along lanes. Soon I was on familiar ground again and we did arrive back in Vahnerow in the evening of the third day! I shall never forget the expression on my mother鈥檚 face when she saw the three of us coming round the corner just as she was coming out of the backdoor .. amazement was mixed with fear, not the joy I had hoped for. They had had a dreadful three days at home. As soon as we had left and all the officers and soldiers had gone as well with their retinue of women, marauding hordes of other Russians had come to loot and to rape old women, all the younger ones having left with the horses. They had terrified everybody. But I went to bed and slept until midday the next day. I stayed with my mother in the vegetable garden where we were relatively safe. I had not been able to eat during our walk home; the fear seemed to have made my throat very tight. I remember finding half a bottle of raspberry syrup near a little stream on our walk, there were dead wasps in it, but it made a wonderful drink with the water from the stream. My mother thanked my two companions with sausages from our 鈥榙ungeon鈥�.鈥�

鈥淭he chaotic conditions went on and on. Not having a resident company of soldiers who provided a certain amount of protection meant that these stray groups of soldiers behind the front line of troops roamed the countryside. The people from Medewitz and Wisbu went home. Mamsell could not bear it any longer and left to walk home to her parents. Ella, Gertrude and Irma left to go home the short distance to Adolfshof. In our house they had been in continuous fear and terror and they felt safer in their small houses at home. On April 23rd Herr and Frau Krienitz and the children left too. They took a letter with them for our brothers and sisters. ~There was no transport anywhere, no post, and no telephone. Nobody knew whether the people would get to the west at all. They would have walked some 80km to reach the Oder and nowhere was safe on the way.鈥�

鈥淲ith Ilse and Renate I spent most of the time in the vegetable garden. My mother stayed in the house and tried to cook for us when possible. From the garden I could see our bedroom windows. If all were clear, my mother would put a white pillow in the open window, but when there were Russians in the house, a red pillow appeared and I was not to come until the white pillow could be seen. What did we eat? I honestly cannot remember very clearly. I know we had potatoes and salt, we missed sugar, and we had some lard, which was the only fat we had. We had some preserves of food in the 鈥榙ungeon鈥�. As time went on there was rhubarb in the garden and some salad stuff. There was a pump in the vegetable garden, which still gave clean water for us and for the village. Sometimes Leni would come from Trieglaff and bring us some bread. Can you wonder that I cannot bear to throw food away, even now, more than fifty years later?鈥�

鈥淪ometimes we were surprised by Russians in the house, in spite of my mother鈥檚 watchfulness and Adda鈥檚 vigilance. The dog would shake and tremble when Mongolian Russians entered the house. They had a very specific smell, which alerted her. They were the most feared soldiers and they were very cruel. The Russians were able to surprise us because all the locks of all the doors were broken and many windows downstairs were smashed. The soldiers could appear at any time. I would run and hide under the cellar stairs (what had been protection for those two German soldiers certainly protected me now) and there I would sit in the dark, sometimes for a very long time. One day I was in the garden house when two soldiers came in and seeing me called 鈥榢omm Frau!鈥� I fought them off and screamed at the top of my voice, when Ilse came in and calmly told them to leave me alone and take her. They did and I ran off. Later when I went to thank her for saving me, she just said: 鈥檇on鈥檛 do it again, venereal diseases are no fun and we have no medicines and most of the Russians are infected.鈥� I said something about having felt safe because I was so thin and unattractive and that they always looked for smaller girls, to which she coolly replied, 鈥業t鈥檚 all a question of demand and supply, and there are no other girls in the village just now!鈥� Ilse was 30, and very worldly wise.鈥�

鈥淕radually the people from the horse trek came back in small groups. They had been walking for many days, well into the province of Brandenburg. Then they were told to walk home. But Alma, the girls who used to peel the potatoes in our kitchen, never came back. With the war still on at first and the Russian troops everywhere, it had taken them many weeks to walk back to us. None of them had tried to run like I had done, because they had been told that I had been caught and shot dead.鈥�

鈥淟eni, my half sister, who lived with the family in Trieglaff was our only source of information, told us of people and young girls who had taken their own lives. Among them was our dear piano teacher Herr Kratz, who had been driven out of his house in Greifenberg with his wife and baby. He had been ill with pneumonia and he killed himself with his wife and child. We think he had been too ill to face up to all the fear and misery.鈥�

Continued in part seven.

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