大象传媒

My grandparents Pat Strange and Phil Clifton had met only a few times before the outbreak of the war. They first met at Mitchum Fair on the dodgems and had a couple of dates before Pat went off to Land Army training. Phil joined the Queen's Own Royal West Kent Regiment in November, trained at Maidstone and went over to France with the BEF in May 1940. By this time Pat had completed training (her training is covered in another entry I have written for this site), done some temporary work in Lincolnshire and would soon move to Bury Farm in Hertfordshire for the duration of the war. They corresponded regularly during this time, but mainly as friends.

Phil saw action in France in May 1940 as the Blitzkrieg swept across Europe. He was captured at St Valery and marched to POW camp in Poland, XXI and later moved to XXB. ONce settled at XXB he then resumed correspondence with Pat.

Phillip Clifton, Getangennummer 2640
Lager-Bezeichnung: Stalag XXI B/H
Deutschland
1/12/40
Dear Pat, Hope this won鈥檛 shock you too much. Remember me? Would have written before but our correspondence is very limited. Just before my capture I became an engaged man. If you should want more news please write home. Please write too if you have time. Things have improved vastly in the last few months and we鈥檙e as comfortable as possible but missing our homes! Keep smiling, it won鈥檛 be long now. Hope all is OK, Love Phil

Phil's fiancee was called Marge, and I know very little about her. He had had a number of girlfriends while at home but was clearly more serious about Marge. A letter to his mum dated 23rd September 1940 says "tell Marge I shall want to marry her when I get back if she still feels the same- I know I do."

However, Pat had entered into correspondence with Phil's mother Win and in a letter dated 25th Feb 1941 Win says "Re: his engagement his girlfriend has returned the ring as in her words: waiting for a Prisoner of War to return is like chasing a shadow. I was very disgusted, but I do not want Phil to know until he returns as he seems so full of good cheer and I loathe the idea of sending depressing news to him." Phil's letters home for a while are often asking after Marge: In a letter to Win dated 26th June 1941, he asks 鈥淚s Marge OK? Haven鈥檛 heard since November.鈥� A month later he says, 鈥淜eep in touch with Pat, will you. She鈥檚 an awfully sweet kid 鈥� you鈥檇 like her lots. The mass girlfriend idea was alright but she鈥檚 the only one who鈥檚 written. Can鈥檛 understand not hearing from Marge. Maybe her mail will come through sometime.鈥�

Pat and Phil's letters continue for 18 months, regularly exchanging news and occasional reminiscences of the few times they had spent together. Finally Phil learnt what Pat had known for some time.

XXB, 19/10/41
Dear Mum, 鈥eard from Pat too but have written card today. As you say she is great 鈥� especially considering I鈥檝e only met her about four times. Marge has let me know the sad news, but us male Cliftons must be a hard-hearted crowd. It鈥檚 only my pride that鈥檚 hurt so don鈥檛 worry. I don鈥檛 blame her. I鈥檇 guessed it months ago anyway. We鈥檝e become inured to that sort of thing over here and I鈥檓 just another added to the long list who have lost their wives or girls. It鈥檚 really a standing joke, but usually the Canadians are the cause. I鈥檝e replied suitably! But subtly!

XXB, 2/11/41
Dearest Pat,
Another few lines to assure you I have by no means forgotten you. I鈥檓 writing you to let you know the whole truth of a novel-like situation. I believe you know I was once engaged, shortly before I left England. I had forgotten the fact till quite recently when I received a letter, the first!, from my one-time fianc茅e, practically announcing her wedding day. I wanted you to know all this because it鈥檚 quite important as to whether it makes any difference to you. I know we鈥檝e only been pals but you鈥檝e been the staunchest pal I鈥檝e had all the time. As I told you I wrote a song a couple of weeks ago. It can tell you just how I feel. I鈥檓 afraid it will have to be transmitted by a third person because there isn鈥檛 room for it on here. I鈥檇 like your comments on everything. Sorry if I鈥檝e seemed a bit dramatic, sounds more like Ruby M Ayres or Wodehouse! However, please believe me, I鈥檓 really serious. I couldn鈥檛 very well tell you before, I wasn鈥檛 free to do so. Think carefully over your decision, you鈥檒l realise what I鈥檓 asking. I only wish I could see you to explain things better. Maybe that won鈥檛 be long anyway. Remember me to Joan and here鈥檚 hoping we see Mitcham Fair together again soon. Happy days honey. All my love Phil

The song was called "You鈥檙e Strange"

I have read in olden books, patience is a virtue
But I鈥檝e found from life itself, just how time can hurt you.
I had heard from other folk, absence makes you fonder
But I scorned them till you came
Now you make me wonder.

You鈥檙e strange, waiting the way you are
When I鈥檓 away so far
It seems to me you鈥檙e strange.
You鈥檙e strange, caring the way you do
After all you鈥檝e been through
Darling please never change.

Time will fly, till we can be together
You and I, two hearts that no-one can sever
Don鈥檛 change, dark days will soon be fair
I know I鈥檒l find you there
Sweetheart, because you鈥檙e strange.

Each letter took about a month to be delivered and so Phil will have sent this off and have had to have waited 2 months before there was much hope of a reply. In the meantime he wrote letters off to Pat as normal and waited...

XXB, 5/4/42
My darling Pat,
Received four letters from you in the last fortnight. Thanks very much 鈥� they are the best of all. If only you knew how happy you鈥檝e made me with just those few lines. I spend my days and nights planning the future 鈥� and what a future we鈥檒l make it!

XXB, 2/6/1942
My darling Pat,
Since writing you last Sunday I've had another lovely letter from you. As a matter of fact, when you were muck spreading and spud setting with the Italians, we were doing the same over here. Sorry to start a lovel letter with muck spreading but have got to start somewhere!...The day your letter arrived mentioning your green jumper I had a parcel enclosing a green pullover the same shade as the Land Amry's! I wonder if there's anything in this telepathy business. I'm always talking to you when I'm working or walking alone. I expect we mention the same things - if and how we'll meet, but sweetheart, that can't be long. Excuse scrawl but am writing in the garden - only wish you were here (under different circs of course) to pinice with me in the woods! Ever yours only, Phil xxx

XXB, 9/08/1942
My own Pat,
Many many thanks for your lovely letter - your greetings reached me day before my birthday. Received from Mum last week what I like to think is my acceptance into the family - please thank her for me. You ask if I think we'll agree. Well your side of the comnination is perfect, sweetheart, but did I warn you of my failing? I'm surly, sarcastic, selfish, untidy, unrelible, conceited but I don't snore! On the other hand, I'm ambitious, love children and all other animals and long to help my loving wife keep house. The house, by the way, should be exactly as you want it, with a bit of land attached so I cam experiment with farming as a hobby! I want to keep my job as I'm halfway through my exams and would like to make a real success of it. The trouble is I want my ambitions fulfilled while I'm still young enough to appreciate them, especialy the farming, but filthy lucre fails. However we shall see. But all things considered, I'm sure we can make a go of it and, as I've said before, I'll do my damnedestto make you happy. If our parents are agreeable, I'd like to get married soon after arriving home, we've lost enough time already. Let me know your ideas of furniture etc and in that way I think we'll be able to sort out everything by post. By the way, I notice discussions in Parliament re marriage by proxy. What an idea! Sorry this letter's so much about me but after all, you've got to know me sometime. Must close with love to Mum and the girls, but to you, no words can express sufficiently my love. it just keeps growing darling and will always be yours, Phil. xx

I don't want to quote many more letters but suffice to say, Pat and Phil courted and entered into engagement by post and then had to wait another 3 years before they could be together. the letters in this period are very similar - imagining what married life will be like, talking about children, and regular complaints about the mail service not being very reliable. They are not long letters and are full of as much love as you could expect for what was, after all, a relationship built almost entirely on correspondence. Occasionally glimpses of who I knew my grandparents to be come through - when Grandma enjoys the sunny weather but says "blast the gnats", or when Grandpa talks about books he has read.

Phil was moved from XXB in late December 1944 and forced to walk west to avoid the apporaching Red Army through one of the worst winters the continent had known. He once wrote Pat at this time, expressing his despair and worries about not making it through to see her again. It was never posted. His band of men reached Braunschweig and were liberated by the Americans in April. He wrote Pat immediately and followed the letter 5 days later.
They were married at Haringay on 19th May 1945 and remined married until Phil's death in 2001.

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