大象传媒

Chapter 22.1

It is now February 1945 we have sufficient parcels to last us until May, in the meantime the German portion of ration is being gradually decreased, for instance the potato ration is only about 陆 that we had this time last year, the bread is of a much more inferior quality. I hope and pray that we are not here after the parcels run out my weight is low enough now, I haven't had sufficient food to keep me warm this winter. Now we have heard that owing to the RAF there will be no margarine or jam issue but instead we will receive in lieu meal or barley. Regarding the food we have in the room, tea is drawn in jugs and we add our own milk and sugar, when we have got it; by very frugal practice I manage to make mine last out every time. The bread is a bit of a problem; it could quite easily be eaten for one meal. Again one had to consider whether it was cut up into thin or thick slices, if cut thin would there be sufficient butter or jam to cover them, by cutting them thicker the spreads could be made to last the requisite time. When to eat it was a problem, I cut my bread ration in two, one half for supper the other I used as breakfast.

So my feeding day was planned as follows: -

0800 - Tea from mess (Red X.) 6 very thin slices of bread, butter and jam.
1100 - Brew of tea made from old tea leaves re-boiled and any cold tea left over from breakfast.
1200 - Midday meal in mess.
1400 - Tea from mess (Red X.)
1700 - Evening meal.
2000 - Tea or cocoa made in room from Red X parcels, bread, butter and jam, 1 biscuit and cheese.

On Sundays it was much the same except that we had no evening meal it all being served at midday and instead of tea at 1400 it was served at 1530. As I write this in February 1945 it has been published in the papers that there is to be a further cut in rations whether it will affect us we do not yet know, but generally it is that the rations for a month at present have got to be made to last 5 weeks or that they are to be cut by 12 陆 %, the fuel is to be cut by 50%. So much for food, I hope that I shall not mention it again in detail, sufficient to prove how weak I am at present is that I find I am unable to do exercise and my practice of getting up early has had to be stopped, I now lay in bed until about 9.30 and have not got the courage or strength to hurry anywhere.

The Weather
Although I had been in Germany and Silesia before I was not quite sure what kind of weather to expect, it had been a long time ago. The weather in Italy had been cold in winter but in no way severe, the summer had been as you expect glorious, our arrival in Germany was greeted by very sunny and quite pleasant weather almost up to Christmas and then it turned much colder but really not as cold as I expected, it was necessary to wear much more clothes and it was extremely cold during the night and early mornings. I used to sleep in socks and two cardigans but on the whole it was not too bad, though colder than England. Because of the receipt of a Red Cross parcel a week one got sufficient to eat to keep out the cold, the coming of spring made a lot of difference. Walks were introduced which made things a lot better, a sports field was put at our disposal, where I spent some happy times lazing in the sun on my own thinking of home, other times I went on walks they were simply grand, I used to like to roam along alone allowing my thoughts to wander. I should have enjoyed them more so could it have been possible to have a good meal on return, they made me extraordinarily hungry. The return to camp almost broke my heart, the approach to the camp was down a hill the place always reminded me of a pit head, and down my spirits went again. I took advantage of these walks and visits to the sports field on 8 occasions then gave it up because I got so low-spirited. The summer weather was quite warm, shorts and shirtsleeves were the thing, but the sun was too strong for me to read until I was given a pair of sunglasses. At this period I get up at about 6 am and took my bit of exercise, it was grand, the evenings were most peaceful, we were not locked in before 9.30 or 10, and so we were able to have a good stroll up and down the square. This lockup time was quite alright in summer but as winter draws in and the nights got darker so the lock-up became earlier until in December and January we were in our bungalows like naughty school boys at 4.30 and let out again at 7.45 the following morning, I have not been out after dark since being in Germany. But I am supposed to be writing about weather, in November 1944 weather started to be severe, cold weather, cold winds and rain, now we all began to feel the effects of little food, December was extremely cold, snow was the order of the day, I tried to stick it but was far too weak and at the end of December I had to give up my job of QM. During the month of January I was well and truly laid low, I felt such a idiot about it all but I could do nothing and couldn't keep myself warm. I only left the room to go on check parades and for my food the rest of the time I simply lay in my bed, the only warm place. I have never known it so cold, possibly we should not have felt it had we more food in our tummies, it wasn't there to be had so it was a case of grin and bear it. I confess that I was in low spirits and demoralised, there is nothing else to say for it, and however I was not the only one. Today is the 8th February 1945 it has been a wonderful day, in consequence I feel much better and am getting more life in me, but I shall not be right until I am once again with my Kit of that I am certain.

Week Commencing Sunday 4th February 1945
A telegram has been received on Friday 9th February saying that we may each receive a food parcel a week from the 1st February, the news was received with cheers, it is grand news, but isn't the news I was hoping for, looking at it with a sober mind I would much sooner have received good war news, all along it has been my opinion that things have got to get worse before better, and this has thrown a spanner in the works, I was hoping we were now going through our last bad period, but apparently that has to come, we have parcels for 5 or 6 weeks. What will happen, then I dread it although summer will be getting here. The conversation of the camp has changed today, up to now everyone was food conscious, what subject will take its place; I do not know probably it will be the reason why the parcels were sent. It is however a great relief to be above that craving feeling and the temptation to break into next days allowance of food. This evening I have sat down to my usual cup of cocoa and bread and butter, but I feel much more satisfied the cocoa was sweet and milky (two days supply), I could taste the butter and jam on the bread, so on the whole I feel good, but good war news would really suit me better.

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