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29 October 2014
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Looking for love

Drawing of a woman's face
Is there such a thing as true love?

Looking for Love 1

by a mysterious woman
In the first Looking for Love blog, we meet a woman who's had her fair share of heart breaks, having been through one divorce and countless failed relationships. Now, aged 'forty-plus', she's about to embark on a new quest to find The One...

So here I am – in my forties, been through the mill a bit and fabulously single (of course it’s true).Ìý The last six years have been an experience in itself.Ìý I’ve been through every life experience apart from giving birth (thank goodness – I don’t do pain).Ìý

It’s been an interesting and challenging time.Ìý Now that the dust has settled a bit – nearly over the hatred of numerous exes (well I don’t dislike them all), oh and that’s post divorce dates not ex husbands, and have coped with bereavement on several fronts - it’s time to do something about my life.Ìý

"Am I out of touch with the dating game?ÌýAre they are any rules? Where do you go to meet a man who is sane, fun and just normal?"

My life.Ìý Divorced, good job, own home, teeth and car and can scrub up well from time to time – well quite a lot actually. This is me – this is my life and now I need to do something about finding a date!Ìý I’m not desperate but I’m just at that stage where I want to share things with somebody else.Ìý

To be honest the whole idea terrifies me.Ìý I’ll have to shave my arms and legs (just in case), pluck my eyebrows on a regular basis and do the girlie thing and go for manicures.Ìý Not that I don’t do this things on a regular basis, but let’s face it girls if we can get away without doing some of these things – we do!Ìý

When was the last time you bought new underwear?ÌýRecently, I was speaking to a girlfriend who has a new man in her life (post divorce), and she told me, ‘darling the best thing has been getting knew underwear – after all how else am I going to get what I want from him’.Ìý I’m not sure that this will be my approach.Ìý I need all the help and advice I can get.

I have tried it all.Ìý Even tried internet dating but don’t tell my friends.Ìý Scary photos, scary people and I gave it all up.Ìý I’ve never picked anyone up in a bar.Ìý Have you been out on a Friday and Saturday night recently? The music pumps, the alcohol kicks in and everyone is out for a wild time – usually with a man or woman they don’t know.Ìý I meet most of them on a Sunday morning – walking home the morning after the night before.Ìý Not my style really.Ìý

Call me old fashioned but I just can’t do the one night stand thing.Ìý I often wonder if it is difficult for people to say no.Ìý There is a pressure there whatever your age.Ìý If you say yes to a date is that a licence to jump into bed with that person.Ìý Does this mean that I’m out of touch with the dating game?Ìý Is this what the rules say?Ìý Are they are any rules? Where do you go to meet a man who is sane, fun and just normal?

You can see my dilemma.Ìý Where do I begin?Ìý The first line to the theme to Love Story – 'will there be a story to tell or will I go from disaster to disaster?'...

Time to call in some expert advice.Ìý Meet my new friend Lesley.Ìý She runs an introduction agency.Ìý I’ve never done this before and I’m not quite sure what to expect. I’ve booked out four hours in my diary to go and meet her and face some questions.Ìý What will she ask?Ìý How does it work?Ìý Will it work for me?Ìý Today is the beginning of a new me.Ìý Question is will me be good enough for someone else?Ìý Will it be dating delights or the usual disaster?Ìý

last updated: 20/09/06
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