Arrivals for the fank
Posted: Thursday, 23 March 2006 |
I think the first arrivals for the Fank are here. This morning at 11 o'clock, the good old Isle of Arran could be seen sneaking into port at an unexpected hour. She trailed vapours of Toilet Duck and Savlon shandies, so I think the Northerners must have hailed her from the shores of Loch Seaforth.
Now, as in all fanks, blond is best, so the local chemist shops have been stocking up on hydrogen peroxide for bleaching. Toilet Duck won't have a quack of an effect on your hair colour, you need the strong stuff for that. The beads that Calumannabel advised me to get for US contestants have turned up in the Ness emporium, probably for use at the fank.
I went down to the pier to assist with the circular conveyor belt that is coming from Unst, to be used in the caber tossing contest. Whether it's actually cabers that are going to be tossed or rejects at the fank, I dread to think. I'll have to get on to Galson Tractors to advise them to park well away from the fank. I'd hate one of their smart vehicles to get hit by a blond bombshell.
Comments
That was their make up, luggage and knitting coming 'luggage in advance'. Anythink likely to get wet in the longboat or anything taking up space that could be occupied by a captured male en route came via CalMac.
calumannabel from Logistics R Us Ness
TDS could catch on Arnish - Toilet Duck & Savlon - sounds as if it has a bit of body combined with palate cleansing qualities. 'I had a tedious (TDS) time on the ferry', folks will say as they stagger off the gangway.
Annie B from the usual
I have it from the horse's mouth that TDS also stands for Three Times A Day.
Arnish Lighthouse from Stornoway
I have been in Lewis since late 2004 and am observing life on this fascinating island from an outsider's perspective. I look out at the lighthouse every day - as it looks out over the island and the sea. 
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